Finally
by windedeagle
Summary: Jesse and Suze are getting married...now if only she can fit into a four, find the perfect dress, and get her mom to stop calling while her and Jesse are in bed...oh, and the ghost that wants to kill her best friend? Yeah, she wants Suze dead now too.
1. Chapter 1

I looked up at the clock on the wall. It was seven. Time for me to jet.

"Well, I should be going," I told Jesse, who looked at me with the saddest sad face I have ever seen.

"I thought we were going to dinner?" he asked in that sexy, deep voice.

"I thought you had to work," I said, and tried not to sound so pleading.

"Not until nine," he said quietly.

I groaned inwardly. Sometimes I hate love. "Well, I'll stay for fifteen more minutes. Then I have to go home; I promised my mom I'd come to dinner." I paused, then added, "I would have asked you to come if I knew you didn't have to work until nine."

He smiled his breath taking smiled. "That's alright, Susannah. We can go to eat tomorrow."

I reached out and kissed his cheek, then found his lips.

Maybe I should stop here and explain, and save you the details of this part of our evening.

I'm still the same old Suze, only eight years older and a half-cup size bigger. And Jesse is still the same old Jesse, eight years older and...no bigger anywhere, I guess. Not that I know, but I'll go into that later.

So what all have you missed? Nothing really. I'm out of high school and in my last year of nursing school. And sometimes I do wonder if I picked the right job. I mean, people do annoy the crap out of me most of the time. But hey, I get to work with Jesse. That makes up for a lot.

Jesse, now a resident doctor here in Carmel, with only a few more years until he is a MD, works night shifts three times a week and makes enough money for the rent on his little apartment, his food, some of his clothes (since I do most of his shopping), and a savings account. And while three nights a week might not seem like much, I saw his pay check once and _man_, was I ever wrong. In fact, I suspect he makes just enough for a down payment on a two bedroom house and oh, say, the engagement ring I saw on the Tiffany's website last week. But whatever. It's his money.

Me? I have no money. I know, it's sad. And I still live at home, which is sadder.

But I mean _come on_! My mom is paying for my food, board, clothes...everything I would be paying for if I was out there on my own. Besides, I'm not even home most of the time. I'm with Jesse.

And it's not like I haven't tried to move in with him. But no, no, no, Jesse is a fanatic about morals and "waiting until we're married" and all that crap. It sucks. All my friends have done it! And I'm the only virgin in the house, too. But he just can't see that.

So now that you're in the know, let's continue.

Jesse and I went on kissing for a while, and when I pulled away enough to make out the hands on the clock I thought o_nly twelve,_ then,_ twelve?,_ then realized I was looking at it from upside down on the floor. Oops. It was seven-thirty. Crap.

"Uh, Jesse." I really hated to stop his wonderful biting on my neck, but I kind of had to be somewhere.

"_Querida_," he breathed, then went back to his biting.

"I, uh, got to go."

He looked up at the clock and sighed. "I guess you do," he said, and got off me. "Would you like me to take you home?"

"Um, no, I'm fine. I've got my mom's car." That's another thing: no car. But I have a very good idea from the history tab on my mom's computer that that might change this Christmas.

"Alright, _querida_," he whispered, and pulled me up beside him to give me one more awesome kiss. "Call me tomorrow."

"I will," I panted, on account of that great good-bye kiss, and made my way outside to my mom's car.

Parked beside my mom's car was Jesse's car: a 2000 black BMW. Seriously. So what if it was a gift from some rich old dead lady who we helped move on to her place...which I can only think of one place an old bag like her could go. It still wasn't fair. I mean, I was the one who called the old lady's son in the first place to tell him she had kick the bucket. All Jesse did was open a storage closet on whatever floor he had been working that night and, after hearing her sap story, told her were to find me. I should be the one with the BMW, not him.

But at least I get free rides.

I got in my mom's car and pulled onto the street the opposite way of my house. Yeah, I lied. So what? I would take care of my little problem, stop by Taco Bell, and be home by eight-thirty. Piece of cake, or so I thought. Man, was I ever wrong.

It was super cold when I got to the old house that my little problem had been hanging around, and I had to dig through the trunk for a jacket. But I only saw one of mine, a Juicy Couture sweat jacket. Not only was it too thin, I had just spend ninety dollars on it and was not about to have it messed up. So I dug further, and found an old sweatshirt.

Just do it! it said, only it didn't mean in the Nike way, since it was under a very nasty picture of two stick people. I smelled it and sighed. My stepbrothers were so gross.

Better than freezing though, I guess.

My little problem was waiting (for me, no doubt) in the old metal swing that hung from a tree limb in the front yard. She looked up at me with piercing blue eyes, then stood up and came over to me.

She was a lot taller than me, and under her basketball sweatshirt was long, strong arms. Too bad the sport she had lived for had killed her.

"You know what you have to do," I told her, trying to keep my voice down so her family inside wouldn't wake up and she some weird girl in a provocative sweatshirt talking to the wind.

"What?" she asked, not bothering to keep hushed like me. Not that she needed to, or anything. "Put the pills out for her to see? Why can't she just think it was a heart attack? Those kinds of things run in our family."

"Because if she _doesn't_ find out, her thinking she pushed you to death is going to keep you here forever. Even after she's gone. Don't you want to at least get the chance to see her again, maybe?"

She kicked at the dirt with her basketball sneakers. "But she will hate me."

"You're dead! It's not like you're going to get grounded or anything!" Oops. That did it.

She glared at me as the wind picked up, blowing some hair loose from her ponytail. I saw tears stream out of her eyes, then the limb that held the swing, which was now shaking frantically, broke and landed with a loud _boom_! and pieces of it went flying. I ducked the biggest, but felt the biting pain of a sharp-edged chunk hitting me in the arm.

And to my surprise, the ghost-girl yelled, "Fine! I'll do it!", and disappeared.

I sighed. That's ghosts for you.

Looking down at my arm for the first time, I noticed a big rip in the sleeve and that the black jacket was kind of turning darker...I pulled up the sleeve and saw the wood had cut the important looking vein in the crook of my arm. I sighed. Fantastic. Another trip to the emergency room.

And then I groaned. Jesse was working tonight. Maybe he wouldn't be in the emergency room, though. God, I hoped not.

It took me forever to make it to the hospital, and even longer to find a parking space. The whole time I kept the sweatshirt wrapped around my arm (which was probably really unsanitary) and tried to remember all the bones of the face for my quiz the next morning in Anatomy.

I finally found a parking place and went to put my name down with the front desk. And then I waited. And waited.

But not for too long. Because the next time I looked up to see the clock I saw Jesse coming around the corner, and the expression on his face told me I'd better not go anywhere.

He came over and glared at me a minute before he leaned down to looked under the jacket.

While he looked, I took a deep whiff of his hair. It smelled so good. And he looked so hot in his black scrubs with the white shirt underneath. God, I wanted him!

But instead of taking me to a closet to make out like in my fantasy, he instead took me into the emergency room and had me sit on a bed while he got out some stuff. I tried to ignore the needle and metal thread he had.

"So," I said, in a truly conversational voice, "how has your evening been?"

He looked up at me, then back at the stitches he was carefully sewing into my forearm.

"You can't just say nothing, Jesse," I told him. And he did say something. Only it was in Spanish. "I'm sorry," I mused, but that didn't help.

Once he was done he wrapped my stitches up tight and stood up.

"That's all? You're done?" I asked.

"Not at all," he said quietly, and, after holding out the sweatshirt to read it, threw it in the trash. "I still have to call your mother."

"My mom!? Why? I can drive myself." Which was a lie, seeing at how I couldn't even bend my arm past 90 degrees. But whatever.

"No, you cannot," he told me sternly. But I guess my pout kind of worked, since his face softened and he sighed. "I guess I could take you on my break."

"Yeah! Break. That sounds good."

He looked at the clock and sighed again. "I have fifteen more minutes. Go sit in _that_ chair and _don't_ _move_. Understand, _querida_?"

"Yeah, yeah, of course. Won't move an inch."

He looked at me for a few more seconds and walked off, saying some more Spanish stuff.

Oh well, he'd get over it. I went and took my assigned seat. The only problem with this seat was that I got a great view of everyone coming into the emergency room. Which was OK, until the first ambulance came. Then it got a little gross.

I was about to ditch my chair for another one on the other side of the room when Jesse came up, keys in his hand and a little blood on the white long-sleeved shirt under his scrub shirt.

"Ready?" he asked, and I nodded quickly and followed him out the automatic doors.

I turned up the radio since that "We Got More Bounce In California" song was on, but Jesse pushed the mute button. "Please," he almost whispered. "I have a headache."

I glared out the window. Jesse always had a headache when songs like that were on. Or maybe it was because me seemed pretty peeved, but whatever. Like I said before, he would get over it.

Only he didn't seem over it when he pulled into my driveway, or when he turned off the car and gave me a warning glance when I went to open the door.

"What?" I asked him. "Are you mad because I got myself hurt?"

"No," was the loud answer. "I'm angry because you told me you were going home to eat with your family, and you went somewhere else. Somewhere else to do something I have told you a _thousand_ times not to try by yourself. That is why I am angry."

And then he added, more softly, "What if something had happened to you, _querida_? I would have no clue where you were. You don't know what that would have done to me." He looked over at me, the moon hitting his face just right. "I love you so much, _querida_, what _would_ I have done? You are my life, and my only..." He drifted off for a minute, then leaned over to reach into the glove compartment and grab something...

...something little, and black, and square...

"_Querida_," he started, setting the little box on the dash board in front of him. "Susannah, I love you so very much, and we both have done so very much to get each other and, well," he looked out the window for a second, and then back at me, "I was going to wait until after you where done with school, and I had this long speech I was going to tell you, but I think this is the time for it."

He took that little satin box that had Tiffany's&Co etched on the front, and opened it to show me the very ring I had looked at the other night on the computer.

"Susannah, _querida_, will you marry me, and please be my family? Please?"

I never was one to cry, and really didn't expect myself to, but by the time he was done with his little speech I was bawling. So much all I could do was nodded my head throw my arms around him. But I think he got the message.

I didn't go into my house until Jesse stopped our frantic kissing to tell me he was going to be late. I hid the ring and the little box in my purse and made it just in time to catch my mom coming out the door to "check on us". But her disdain for our kissing was replaced by freaking out over my arm, and I made up a story about breaking a plate a dinner, or something. After she made sure I was alright a fifth time she let me go upstairs to take a bath.

While I soaked in the hot water, I could help but to get happier. I mean I was getting married! And my own house, and my own life...not to mention a sex life.

I thought about that for a minute and laughed out loud. Suddenly my crappy day was getting a lot better.


	2. Chapter 2

_I have never noticed, but little is a weird word. Little. Little. Little. See? It is._

My crappy luck returned the next day just in time for my quiz in anatomy. Not only was my arm killing me, I also had forgotten all the bones I was supposed to know.

"It's probably from the trauma," my friend, Kristan, said when we walked out to our cars. Kristan and I had gotten close the past year, since CeeCee had taken that job at some big Atlanta newspaper and had called to tell me the other day she was moving to Chicago. I miss her sometimes, but Kristan fills in perfectly. She's the kind of friend who will go to Victoria's Secret with me and let me stay at her apartment when my family gets on my nerves and do crazy stuff with me like egging her ex's car. (Which was her idea.) She is also going to be a nurse, and is way smarter at anatomy and math. She's great. And so I felt she was the first person who should find out about my getting married.

"Well, I guess. But I don't think that's going to help my D," I said, meaning about the trauma comment.

"Want to get something to eat? I'm starving."

"Um, no, that's fine. I was going to dinner with Jesse." I looked over my shoulder to make sure the few people behind us had walked off, then grabbed her arm. "Oh God, I've got to tell you!" I whispered, and showed her the ring in my purse.

She screeched and pulled it out, holding it really close to her face. "He asked! Finally! When are you getting married!?"

"Shh," I told her, then took the ring and put it on my finger. "I don't know yet. He just asked last night."

She screeched again, and hugged me. "That's awesome! I've never been a bridesmaid before."

She gave me a meaningful look, and I rolled my eyes. "Of course you're going to be a bridesmaid. And I'll also make you maid-of-honor runner-up, after Gina, of course."

She squealed this time, then calmed down. "Well, I won't keep you waiting from Jesse. I know you are," she elbowed me, "_anxious_ to see him."

I snorted. "Just because we're getting married doesn't mean anything to him. Trust me."

She smiled. "Well you never know. Maybe Dr. Jesse has changed his mind."

"We'll see," I said, and waved good-bye.

I started up my mom's car and rolled down the windows, letting the last warm air of summer hit me. After finding a good song to listen to, I went to see Jesse.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

As soon as I came into his apartment I was rushed to the couch and the bandage was taken off of my arm. Jesse examined his stitches, then went to get the plastic box he kept in a cabinet in his kitchen that had "The Fix Susannah Box" written on in with a Sharpie. Ha ha, real funny.

I looked away when he started to clean it, and noticed Spike curled up on the chair glaring at me. I glared right back. That stupid cat had left seventeen little scars on my hands and arms, last time I counted. Jesse had debated with me that seven of them were freckles, but whatever. For all he knew I could have been a hand model or something if it wasn't for that stupid cat.

"Susannah," Jesse said quietly, and I looked at him. "Leave the cat alone."

"I wasn't messing with the cat! It was starring me down!"

He looked at me again, a little smile on his lips, and finished with my arm.

I examined at his handiwork. "When do I get the stitches out?" I asked him.

He started to put things back in the box. "I would wait another week. Then you came come to the hospital and I can take them out." He smiled at me. "No charge, _querida_."

"But you work nights," I whined, a vague attempt to get him to take them out earlier.

"Actually, I was going to start working days." I looked at him in surprise, and he smiled as he got up to put the box away. "Well I thought you would want me to be at home at night, when we get married."

Oh yeah. I forgot all about that. "So you are going to work everyday?"

"Only Monday through Friday, _querida_. And only from eight until five."

That didn't sound so bad. "When are you going to start?"

He came and sat beside me, taking my hand with the engagement ring and holding it up close to his face. "Next Monday. When are we getting married?"

That question kind of blew my mind for a minute. Well, actually, A-SAP was the first answer I had in mind, but then I thought on it some more. It was too cold to get married right now, in November. And with Christmas on the way it would be too much. I had finals in April... "How about May?"

He was quiet for a minute while he scrutinized my ring. "May sounds good," he finally decided, and kissed my cheek. "Do you want to go eat?"

"Now?" I asked, looking at the clock. "It's only four. How about we go look at something first."

He raised the eyebrow with the little scar. "What do you want to look at?"

"Oh, I don't know," I mused, picking up his hand and playing with it. "I was thinking houses, maybe."

"Houses!" he exclaimed, then laughed. "Why houses?"

"Uh, because I'm not going to live _here_."

"What's wrong with here?" he asked defensively.

"Because! Here is...well, here. It's just an apartment. I want a house." He groaned and picked Spike up off the coffee table. "And I know it's not too much to ask. I've seen your paycheck."

"But _querida_..."

"Just a little house," I said quietly. "A little house in a little neighborhood with a little garden and a little--"

"Fine, Susannah," he said, which was a good thing, because I was running out of _littles_. "We will go look. But that doesn't mean you will find it tonight."

"Oh, I know," I said.

And it turns out that he was right. We didn't. Oh, don't get me wrong, we looked. For hours. But I hated all of them—too big, too small, too old.

By the time we made it to dinner I was in a pretty bad mood. Well, okay, a really bad mood.

We went to Jesse's favorite Mexican restaurant, the one I was so tired of but Jesse couldn't seem to get enough of. I guess it reminded him of the olden days, only with margaritas. One time I asked Jesse if his mom ever made margaritas. He said she didn't.

But I had convinced him to try one when he turned twenty-one, and he liked it. In fact, it was the only alcoholic beverage he _would_ drink. Even if he only had one when we went out to eat.

He was always getting different stuff, too. Never the same thing. Me? I just stuck with a burrito.

So I was drinking my margarita, eating my burrito, when Jesse finally noticed my mood.

"What is it, _querida_?" he asked in a deep, sexy accented voice. One that had my head swimming.

"Nothing," I mumbled.

"Is it about the house? I told you, Susannah, it would be a while before you found one you liked."

"I know," I mumbled again. He sighed.

"I'm not working this weekend. We can go look on Saturday until you find one you like. How about that?"

I sat up a little and shrugged. "I guess that would be okay."

He smiled at me. "You are just getting caught up on something little, _querida_. You haven't even told your family yet."

And that got me thinking. About telling my family, I mean. I was kind of dreading it. Maybe Sunday dinner would be good.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

Saturday came before I knew it, and I was pumped. I had been looking online when my family wasn't around, and had found a ton of houses I liked.

But as soon as I got in the car Jesse told me about a house his friend had told him about.

"Ben says it's in very good condition, and it is under a foreclosure, so the price is very much in our range."

Ben was Jesse's only really close friend, and they weren't even that close. Jesse was kind of a loner, which made me worry about him sometimes. If it wasn't for me, he would be a recluse. Well, if it weren't for me, he wouldn't be here, but whatever. But Ben was sort of a loner, too. I guess that's why they're friends.

Ben had been Jesse's friend since he started school, and they both worked together at the hospital. I heard they had been dubbed the "Dr. McDreamy" and "Dr. McSteamy" of the emergency room. I think that Jesse is McDreamy.

"So," I said, back to the houses, "where is this house?"

"Only about fifteen minutes from here," Jesse said, and I through him a skeptical look. "What?" he asked.

"There's something you're not telling me, Jesse de Silva."

"That is not true, Susannah. I am telling you everything." He sent me a smile that made me forget about what we were discussing.

It took just as long as he said it would to get to the neighborhood, a quaint little place called Seagrove. It was kind of charming, all the houses painted in yellows, blues, and pinks with white shutters. But all the houses were for rent, not for sale.

It turns out the actual "houses" of the neighborhood were further down the main street, and that main street ended in a cul-de-sac.

And in that cul-de-sac Jesse pulled into a little driveway in front of a dark blue beach cottage with white shutters.

And all I could do was stare. It was perfect! Just what I had in mind. I leaned across the seat and kissed Jesse.

"What was that for?" he whispered, his warm breath hitting my lips. But I ignored his silly question.

"Can you write a contract on it today? Please? That way I can start shopping for furniture next week--" 

He put his hands on either side of my face to stop me. "We haven't even seen the inside yet, _querida_."

"So we can get it?"

He let go of me and got out of the car, then came and opened my door (which, as I have stated many times, I can open my own door) and pulled me out of the car.

I groaned as he led me into the house. (Excuse me, _our_ house.) It seemed like now that I liked the house, he was going to hate it. What was his deal? Wasn't he the one gah-gah over the idea of a cheap house in the first place?

Sometimes Jesse really unnerved me. But his butt did look great in those jeans.

He opened the door for me, which had been left unlocked by the real estate agent for us. I took a look around _our_ house...the living room, the kitchen directly off of it...the view of the beach...and I was sold.

So the walls needed to be repainted, and the bathrooms and kitchen needed some serious gutting, so what? It was our little fixer-upper, and it was just what I wanted. Besides, Jesse couldn't resist the pouty face.

Which is just what I gave him. The pouty face, I mean. And I had the pleasure of seeing his brown eyes turn a little mushy.

"Can we please, please, please, please have it? Please? I will be so good."

He smiled a little. "Good how?"

"I will...I will not use my sexual powers over you to try to get you to sleep with me until we're married." Which was a big thing for me, really.

"Your sexual powers over me? Like the kind you are using right now?"

I groaned. "I don't mean girly powers. You're just going to have to get over those."

He sighed and took his hand over the wall next to him. "I _assume_ we can get it."

Jesse's lack for enthusiasm had no effect on my own. But he did only slightly groan when I jumped on him and wrapped my legs around his waist, then proceeded to kiss every square inch of his face, neck, and even a little of the chest hair poking out of the V of his shirt before he stopped me. I didn't get off, though.

"So we can really have it?" I asked. I saw his eyes narrow as he looked around one more time, then he sighed again and kissed my neck.

"If it is really what you want, _querida_."

"Of course it's what I want! It's perfect!" I hugged him one last time before I climbed off of him.

"I'll call the real estate agent tomorrow." He put an arm around my waist when I started to jump around again. "But don't get too exited, _querida_. It might already be sold."

I just rolled my eyes.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

My happy mood didn't last too long, I'm afraid. The next day, which I had hoped to spend with Jesse, was taken up by studying and washing clothes. Dinner was in the back of my mind all day; I could smell Andy's seven small turkeys in the oven, all made with a different recipe. Thanksgiving was still two weeks away, but Andy obviously couldn't start experimenting early enough.

But enough about turkey, the thing that had me worried was the actual dinner. As in the dinner where I was going to break the getting-married news. The dinner where I was going to tell my mom her only daughter was moving out and finally _finally_ getting her own life.

And, yeah, our house was only going to be fifteen minutes away, but still.

I had just changed my new Aerie pajama shorts for a pair of Victoria's Secret Pink baseball sweat pants and a clean white tee (hey, it was my day off. This was about as far as I was going for Sunday night dinner dress up) when Jesse showed up. When he rang the door bell I ran down stairs yelling "I got it, I got it!" before anyone else could get it first.

I was so relieved to see his face when I opened the door, all I could do was gasp and hug him. Then push him up the stairs to my room before anyone could notice.

I shut my door behind me and turned to face Jesse in a whirl, then grabbed him again. "I'm freaking out!" I whispered.

"I can see that, Susannah."

I groaned and pushed him away, then flopped face-down into my pillows. "Seriously," I said, even though I'm not all that sure he heard me.

I felt him sit beside me, then I felt his hand on my back. "What is it?" he asked quietly.

I turned over, stubbornly taking the hand he had pulled away and laying on my belly. "I have no idea how to tell my mom."

"Easy," he mumbled, his big hand drawing casual circles on my belly. "Just say, 'Mother, Jesse and I are getting married.'"

"Ha-ha," I said bitterly, and he sighed.

"Well, if it were our daughter getting married, and she had come to tell us, what would you want to hear?"

I watched him for a second, then said, "I'm letting you slide on the daughter thing." He smiled sweetly, and I took a deep breath, letting the feel of his hand on my stomach etch into my mind. "I guess that...well, that I was getting married, and when you purposed, and how much I love you, and all that." I groaned and turned over into the pillow again. "I give up," I mumbled.

Jesse leaned down next to me so his sweet breath (he was chewing Orbit sweet mint gum, I could smell it) was hitting my ear. "I think you can manage without a script, _querida_," he whispered. Then kissed my cheek. Then my lips. Then my chin, then my neck...

And talk about using your sexual powers for evil!

But our little charade ended with my mom knocking on my door (_somebody_ ratted me out) and Jesse apologizing. At least he was apologizing for almost getting me in trouble, not for actually kissing me in the first place.

See! We have made _some_ progress.

But dinner was ready, so I sighed and grabbed Jesse and toted him down the stairs.

Andy, who had obviously gotten word that Jesse was in my room, was watching for us to come down before he started to serve the food. I picked the most normal looking turkey to share with Jesse.

Our table was packed, as always: Dopey and David still lived at home (Dopey because he was a collage drop-out loser and David because he was just starting collage this year.) Jake, at least, had a life—he owned a little surf shop in town, and he lived in the apartment above it. He had a steady live-in girlfriend—Summer (fitting name) with blond sun-bleached hair and dark skin from being out all the time. She also had this awesome tattoo on her back she had showed me one time, but the "'rents" don't know about that one.

And then me and Jesse, of course. At the table, I mean.

We had our usual dinner—plenty of fighting and stealing each other's food. When Andy brought out the pumpkin pie (another Thanksgiving experiment), I knew it had better start my little speech.

I reached into my front pocket to get the ring out, but it was stuck in the corner. I know I looked pretty weird jerking around in my seat, since Jesse let go of my other hand under the table and Dopey opened his big mouth to say something. But before we could enjoy the wonderful commit my stepbrother was about to make, I got the ring on and reached for the piece of pie right in front of my mom.

Who, when she saw it, dropped her own pie, which landed on the floor to be vacuumed up by Max, and hugged me so tight my pie would have landed right beside if it was not for Jesse's taking it away from me.

I really didn't hear what all my mom was saying, she was crying so hard. No one else said anything for a while, until I saw (I couldn't really feel that much right then) Andy grab my hand and look at the ring. Then he asked, "You two are getting married?"

Whoa. _Big_ shocker.

My mom had let me go and told me how happy she was and cooed over my ring and ask me all kinds of questions, and then Andy pulled out a bottle of champagne he had hidden for "special occasions" and made a toast.

And the whole time I was completely embarrassed. All I really wanted to do was slip down under the table and hide. Well, and pull Jesse down there and make him hide with me.

I was so relived when it was all over and I had walked outside to say good-night to Jesse.

"I thought it when well," he told me after I made the hiding-under-the-table comment.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, Jesse. Sure."

He checked to make sure we weren't being spied on, then wrapped his arms around me. "Are you excited about getting married?"

"_Soooo_ excited," I gushed. "You don't even know." I rested my head on his chest. "And excited about our honeymoon."

I knew he knew what I was aiming at, but he said "Where would you like to go?" to get me off subject. I just shrugged. "Where would you like to go?"

"Any where as long as I am with you." Aw! He was so good!

"How about Mexico?"

"No," was the flat answer.

"Okay, then, how about somewhere in the Caribbean. Like Barbados,"

"Barbados," he purred in a full on Spanish accent, and every cell in my body went _uhhh!_ at the same time.

"Yeah," I said, a little dizzy, "Barbados."

He laughed and kissed me, and I could feel the regret when he pulled away. "I need to go, _querida_. Mondays are always busy at the hospital."

"Don't make up lame excuses, Jesse." I said, joking.

"It isn't a lame excuse. Mondays are busy." He gave me one more little kiss. "Come by tomorrow after school and I'll take out those stitches."

"Really?" I said, and hugged him tight. "Cool. I'll be by ASAP."

He looked inside the little side window once more, then gave me a kiss I felt from my Sperry's to my Fat Hair shampooed head.

I stayed outside to make sure he didn't, uh, hit the mailbox, and watched his black car disappear into the blacker night.

I wondered if Jesse would be any good in bed. I mean, he was an awesome kisser, and he did seem to have a lot of passion somewhere in his little Spanish heart.

And one time when he was sick I was over at his house and walked in on him naked. That really doesn't have to do with anything, but it was still nice. Not that I saw anything, though.

I was pretty sure he was a virgin, too. Not that he had flat-out told me, but he had dropped a clue or two. Unless he was shacking up with some cowgirl back when he was alive...I mean, alive before. If so, she might be getting a little visit from _moi_.

What was I thinking? Of course Jesse was good in bed. He was a stud! How could he not be?

Maybe I was just over-analyzing my fear that he wouldn't like it because he is so against PDA now.

(Whoa, Oprah moment.)

Or maybe I had had too much turkey.

Yeah, that was it. I looked down the street one more time and when inside.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

_Cool! Much more interesting chapters to follow, I promise. I just kinda had to get this one out of the way._


	3. Chapter 3

"You are being so good," Jesse remarked to me. Which would have made me angry if I wasn't having seventeen stitches taken out of my arm, and was trying my very best not to get upset.

"Thanks," I whispered, and went back to making shapes out of the little holes on the ceiling tiles.

"Do you want to hear some good news?" he asked, and I looked at him quickly. His eyebrow was raised.

"Uh, yeah!"

He smiled and bent back over his work. "We got the house."

"Seriously!?" I squealed. A few suffering patients on the cots around me looked over to see the happy girl in the emergency room. I really had wanted to do this somewhere a little more...I don't know, less open, but Jesse had insisted on taking out my stitches right here, on Bed 11.

He shushed me. "Seriously. The real estate agent called earlier."

"So we can move in?" Like I didn't already know his answer.

He smiled. "_We_ have to go sign the papers first, then I assume I will move in, but--"

"But what? Why can't I live there?"

"Because, we are not married yet, Susannah. You _are_ going to wait."

I went back to my ceiling tiles. He sighed after a little while and put up his tools. I examined my arm; only a few tiny scars were left.

"So can I pick out our furniture?" I asked hopefully, and he shot me a look. "What?" I whined.

"I thought you wanted to redo the bathroom and kitchen first." He had put up all his stuff and helped me off the exam table.

"Oh, yeah."

He sighed as we walked towards the door. "Maybe you should decide what you want to do in the house first, Susannah."

"I guess," I said, and he gave me a little hug: about all the PDA I was going to get.

"I'll call you tonight, _querida_," he told me, and I stole a quick kiss before he could object. He gave me another look and disappeared into the emergency room chaos.

So...it was off to the mall for me.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7L7_

Kristan was ecstatic when I picked her up to go to the mall. But first she wanted to see the house. "So I know what I am shopping for," she told me. Kristan was a shopaholic like me.

So I took her by the house, proudly pointing out the _under contract_ addition to the For Sale sign.

She was even more excited when I showed her all the rooms, and she started to plan out the color schemes.

But what got her the most excited was my next door neighbor.

"Who's the hottie?" she asked, and I looked out the screen of the back porch. (Which, I might point out, looks over Carmel Beach and our 6.2 feet of private sand.)

"It's Ben!" I hissed, and Kristan came up beside me to see better.

"Ben who? Jesse's friend Ben?"

"Yes!" I hissed again, and looked at her. "I knew he was hiding something."

"So? God, he _is_ hot!"

I looked back over to see that Ben had taken off his shirt and was laying in a beach chair in the sand. Kristan waved, but luckily he didn't see. "Jesse is so dead," I said (excusing the pun, or past pun, really).

"Why? Do you not like him?" She smiled at Ben's sun tanning form. "Because I'll be glad to take that piece of meat off your hands."

I groaned. "It's not that I don't _like_ him. I just...I don't know. Jesse lied to me!" I pointed out again, and Kristan rolled her eyes.

"Jesse couldn't lie to you if his life depended on it. You have him wrapped around your little finger."

"Not true!" I argued, and looked over at Ben again. Then I groaned and rubbed my face with my hands. "Come on, Kris, let's go shopping."

She tore her eyes off of Ben and followed me out to the car.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7L7_

There are two furniture stores near Carmel. One is this up-scale place in the mall about thirty minutes away. It has soft music, nice employees, and free coffee.

The other place is called Furniture-4-U. Seriously.

So I decided to use a little extra gas to go to the mall.

The nice furniture store also has "cabinet, kitchen, and bathroom specialists", who were the first people I sought out. Or actually they found us first. Before we could walk in the door all the way there were people asking if we needed help and pushing coffee into our hands. I looked at Kristan, who had her eyes on a cutie standing next to her.

"Can I help you with something today?" the cutie asked.

Kristan answered before I did with a happy, "Yes!" You would think she had been on boy abstinence or something. Which was totally not true. Kristan _always_ had a date.

"_I_ need help," I cut in. "I'm gutting my bathroom and kitchen. And I need some furniture."

"How about I show you some things," he said in a voice that made Kristan's mouth water.

But, too bad for Kristan, these "things" was a book. (An awesome book that had every bathroom and kitchen I had seen in _Bath & Kitchen_ magazine.)

"So how much would something like this run?" I asked, pointing to the kitchen I liked best.

"Well, I we would have to come out and measure...and there's installation fees..." he plugged some numbers into a calculator. "About six thousand dollars."

My mouth dropped open. "Six grand? For the kitchen and the bathroom?"

"Oh, no. The bathroom would be about another four thousand more...all together about ten thousand."

I groaned inwardly. Ten grand? We didn't even have the furniture yet!

"Just, um, let me call to my boy—fiancée about it real quick." I got up and looked at Kristan, who I decided would be fine on her own. Probably more than fine.

I called Jesse's cell, (Christmas present from _moi_...the only way I could get him to get one was to give it to him) and was happy when he answered. He must have been on lunch break.

"Jesse!" I said after he said hello. "Have I told you how much I love you today?" He was a sucker for the mushy stuff.

"What have you done?"

Well, most of the time.

"Nothing. Well, without your permission, of course."

"What is it?"

"I, um, well, okay. I'm at the furniture store, not the cheap one but the nice one, and I have found the kitchen and bathroom plans I like, only they cost a lot of money and we still have to get the furniture, but I really like them, and--"

"Wait, _querida_," he said. "How _much_ money, exactly?"

"Ten thousand," I squeaked.

He was quiet for a while, then he sighed. "The only way—the _only_ way—you can do that is if you gut and paint and move our stuff all by yourself."

"You're not going to help me?"

He groaned. "You know what I mean. I am serious, Susannah. No extra money for _anything_."

"Not a cent!" I promised.

"All right, then," he sighed. "Go ahead and order it."

"Cool!" I squeaked, only this time from joy.

"I love you," he told me. "And remember—_no buying anything else_."

"Got it!" I told him, then said I love you back and hung up. When I went back into the cozy little furniture store (or Flirtation 101, as I could see from Kristan's face) I smiled at Mark—that was the cutie's name, Mark—and said, "My fiancée was ecstatic."

I saw Kristan roll her eyes.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7L7_

The next evening Jesse and I went to eat dinner, and while he was in the bathroom I watched the couple a few seats away. They where doing the old I-love-you-so-much-I-can't-keep-my-hands-off-of-you routine, and when Jesse came back he noticed me looking.

"Aren't they cute?" I asked him, and he raised his eyebrow—you know, the one with the scar that I trace with my finger tips occasionally.

"I don't know if "cute" is the right word," he said, and I kicked him softly under the table.

"You be nice," I told him, then added, "I wish you would act like that with me sometimes."

He just laughed. "Do you really need me to act like that to prove how much I love you?"

I cut my into smaller pieces (I had insisted on picking where we would eating tonight, or it would have been Mexican _again_), and said, "I know you love me. You just obviously don't want other people to know."

He smiled and took my hand. "Susannah, if I could I would scream it to the world. But that doesn't mean we should act like that," he nodded to the other table, where the love birds had started feeding each other. "There is a time to act like adults," he told me, "and there is a time to act...differently."

The sexy little smile he gave me at the end of his little speech had my head swimming. "Differently?" I asked, that stupid little voice that is always wrong telling me he might have changed his mind.

"Yes. Differently. Did you want dessert?"

I swear. If Jesse thinks he can get me off subject that easily..."No. What do you mean, differently?"

He took a big bite and pretended to chew it for a really long time, like he was trying to taste all the five cheeses in his lasagna. Finally he swallowed. "Just differently," he said, and when I shot him a look he said, "You know what I mean, Susannah," sort of quiet.

And I smiled, because I did know what he meant. Further proof that, Yes, Jesse is a stud, and, Yes, will be awesome in bed.

My spirits stayed lifted when Jesse drove me home, and I barely even noticed he had turned in our new subdivision.

He drove down our little, homey street to our house. I watched him anxiously as he took the key out of the ignition and showed me our new house key in the blue glow of the dash board.

"Open it," he told me, like it was a present or something. I hugged him tight before running to the door.

Jesse was right behind me, and he helped me turn the door knob when I unlocked it. I swung the door open wide and took a long look at...

Well, at nothing, really, since there was no furniture or anything. But to me, to us, it was enough. Enough to be perfect.

Before I could realize what he was doing, Jesse picked me up and carried me over the threshold and towards the door to the screened-in porch.

"Jesse," I whispered to him in a laugh. "You are supposed to carry me in on our wedding night, not now!"

"Well," he said, smile playing on those all too perfect lips, "this is not about wedding nights, my _querida_. This is about getting you where I want you sooner."

Yeah, so I got a little excited. But that might have been the sexiest thing Jesse has said to me in a long time. Maybe ever. Well, okay, not ever, but still, it was pretty nice. So I had every reason to melt in his arms like butter.

He took me out on the porch and caught the door leading out to our beach-slash-backyard with his foot. He started to carry me down the stairs, but stopped halfway. 

"I have a surprise for you," he whispered.

I tried to control the butterflies in my stomach and said, kind of lamely, "A surprise?" I know. Real sexy.

"Yes, a surprise. So close your eyes," he whispered, and I quickly did what he said.

I have no idea what I was expecting. Maybe a bed. Maybe a car. But I think what I got was something better.

"Open your eyes," he whispered.

Jesse had obviously gotten off work early, because now, where there used to be only the support beams to our house, there was a big hammock, two glasses, and a bottle of champagne.

I squealed with joy (seems like I have been doing that a lot lately) and hugged his neck while he carried me over and laid me down in the hammock. Once I was settled he got in beside me, and the heavy rope fabric hugged us closer.

He popped open the bottle and, while pouring my champagne, asked, "Do you like it?"

I stroked his cheek. "Like doesn't even begin to cover it."

He smiled and handed me my glass.

"So," he asked, the sound of the waves in the background making his voice all the more sweeter, "have you decided where you would like to be married?"

I rested my head on his chest and stared out at the white sand. "I don't know," I whispered to him. He put and arm around me to hold me closer. I buried my nose in his polo shirt and took a deep whiff of him. I love the way Jesse smells. There is no way to describe it, really. I just hope I smell like that when I move in with him.

"Would you like to get married in a church?" he asked me, and I loved the way the deep words vibrated in his chest.

"Um, a church? No."

He grunted at my straightforward answer. "Where else would you get married, then?"

I rolled my eyes and played with the button on his shirt. "You can get married anywhere you want to, Jesse."

"But what about the Lord's blessing?"

I looked at him for a minute. "Jesse, I think the Lord's blessing kind of works where ever." Besides, I had stayed a virgin the whole time we have been dating. The Lord better bless me with something.

"Well, alright then, _querida_, where would you _like_ to get married?"

I ignored his tone. "On the beach, I think."

"On the beach?" Jesse asked, like he was holding back a laugh or something.

"Yes, on the beach. With the waves, and the sand..."

"I...I have never heard of a wedding on a beach."

"Well I have. A lot of people get married on the beach."

He looked out at the beach, then sighed, but in a happy kind of way. "I really don't care where I marry you, Susannah, as long as I do."

_Aw!_ He was so good! I turned his head and kissed his big stubborn mouth.

"I love you," he whispered to me.

"Love you more," I whispered back, and he only shook his head and kissed me again.

_Sorry for cutting my chapter kinda short...i got a laptop for Christmas and will be writing all my new chapters on it...so that means BETTER and LONGER... _


	4. Chapter 4

_At the end of all my chapters I am going to put the websites of all the things they (Suze mostly lol) has bought...paint, dresses, whatever! And since I didn't do it the last time, I'm going to put the ring website at the end of this chapter! Please go look! Its a great time waster for computer class!_

I started gutting my kitchen the next week. At first I thought, you know, piece of cake. I mean all I had to do was break stuff into pieces with a hammer. It seemed pretty easy.

Um, WRONG. Breaking stuff up is not as easy as it looks. Especially when it is eighty-five outside in the middle of November.

And my loser of a fiance Jesse wouldn't even help me. I kept telling him he was going to be sorry when he moved in in a few days, but he just brushed it off with "I have to work" or "Not tonight, Susannah".

Well, at least I got the satisfaction of seeing his face when he came through the door with a box of his stuff that afternoon. He hadn't seen what I had done in the last week, and the shocked look he gave the ruins around me made me want to go nah-nah told you so.

But that, of course, wouldn't be very mature.

"Like what I've done?" I asked, coming over to him and taking the box from his hands. He walked over slowly to what would be our kitchen, then heaved a little gasp, like he didn't know what to say.

But, of course, it being Jesse, he found something. "Susannah, what...how am I supposed to eat?"

I rolled my eyes. "I guess you're going to have to get by on cereal and take-out for a few weeks. Do you think I've done a good job in here?"

His eyes met mine. "For how long?"

"Until the people come out and start putting in everything. They said the Friday after Thanksgiving."

"_Querida_, that is two weeks away."

"Well, a week and a half, really."

He glared at me, shook his head, and took his box back. "Have you started on the bathroom yet?" he asked me while he walked into our bedroom. I followed behind him.

"Not yet. I was going to start that next week." Our bedroom was really nothing to look at. We had already picked out the bed and bought a mattress and box spring and all that, but that was all. Not even a bedspread. Jesse had told me that was okay, though. "It want really be home until you live here as well, querida," he had said. Which had seriously almost made me swoon.

Jesse went into our now-empty closet and started to unpack his box full of clothes. I laid down on the bed. "Left side," I reminded him, referring to the conversation about closet space we had last week, and he said something offhanded sounding in Spanish.

"What do you think we should paint the walls with?"

"Paint."

I ignored his frivolity. "I was thinking a oceany blue. Kind of give it a beach cottage vibe."

He looked up at me. I was laying on our bed on my back with my head hung over the side. He met my eyes for a second, then looked at the walls around me, then back at me. "You are the lady," he said, and then "Not meaning that in a demeaning way, of course" before I could say anything. Jesse still had that Old-World women are our inferiors, We are Sparta kind of mindset sometimes. But I was working on that with him.

"So you think you can survive?" I asked him. "You know, no kitchen, no bathroom. No couches, no tables."

He put a stack of jeans on one of the shelves. "Well, I will have the guest bathroom, will I not? And I thought we could go look at furniture this weekend. And paint. And tonight we could go look at televisions, maybe."

I hated when he said televisions. It's a TV, okay? A T-V. "I guess so. I'm going to have to go home and clean up a little first, though," I said, gesturing to my dry wall incrusted shirt and dusty, holey jeans. You know, the ones my mom hated and Jesse secretly adored. Those jeans.

He finished with his box and came to lay next to me on the bed, his arms wrapping around my waist and his head coming to rest on my shoulder.

"I guess," I said, "I should go ahead and go home to take a shower. You can finish unpacking and I'll drive back here and we can go in--"

He put his hand over my mouth and whispered, "Shh,_ querida_. Let's not talk for a minute."

"What are--" but he stopped me with a fantastic kiss. He had shifted so he was almost lying on top of me, and I let my hand venture down his back and to his butt, which I grabbed without realizing what I was doing. Not like could help it. Jesse did have a great butt.

But instead of stopping me like usual and lecturing me on the behavior of "proper, un-wed young woman", Jesse only let out a sexy little groan and kissed me harder.

Wow. He must have had a ruff day. Jesse never let me grab his butt, and almost never grabbed mine in return, and when he occasionally did he ended up stopping me at what ever I was doing and apologizing. But this afternoon he was all over it; grabbing it, rubbing it...God, he was driving me up the wall! Now only if he would move his hands up a little to my bra...

I didn't let his slowness stop me. I had his shirt off before his first butt grab, and was at the button of his jeans right when he...

Grabbed my hands and brought them over my head.

"Susannah," he breathed, his eyes wide with...shock? Yeah, right. Like he didn't know what I was doing.

"Jesse," I breathed back, more accusingly than surprised.

"Susannah, I have to apologize. I had no idea--"

"Yeah, yeah," I said, pushing him over and sitting up. "Save it, Jesse. We both know you're not sorry."

He watched me for a minute, then sighed. "I guess I should finish unpacking."

"I guess so," I said, a little cocky to get on his nerves, and he gave me a look. I laughed and kissed his frown. "I'll be back in a few hours, Jesse. I love you."

"Hmm." He put his shirt back on and stood up. "Don't be too late, _querida_," he told me, and I rolled my eyes and left.

Walking out to my car, I went to Jesse's trunk and stole a look at what he had brought; clothes mostly, some towels, bathroom stuff, the Fix Susannah Box (he was sooo funny). He had also brought what looked like a half-eaten squirrel, but when I picked it up I realized it was a torn up stuffed animal. Great. I had forgotten all about Spike.

I went ahead and took a shower and got dressed when I got home, then I started going through the stuff in my room. My mom had already bought me some moving boxes at the Fed-Ex store the other day, and I got one out and started putting things in it; books, some collectable stuff (which was going in the attic), some of my summer clothes I was saving for next year, things like that. I also stuck a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt in there, just in case.

My mom knocked a little later and cracked my door open. "Jesse called," she said. "He said he was done unpacking. I see you have started."

"Um, yeah." I was really hoping to skip over this little conversation today, but I could see that wasn't going to happen. "I thought I would go ahead and start so I didn't have to do it all at once, you know."

My mom sat down on my bed and smiled at me. Uh-oh. A mother/daughther talk was coming up, I could feel it.

"I'm just so glad you're happy, Susie. I...well, for a few years there I didn't know where you would end up. But I obviously was wrong. Jesse...Jesse is such a great man, Suze. Especially for you. He has done a lot for you." I could see a tear or two spilling over. "I just wish your dad could be here to see you and know how happy you are."

I came over to my bed and hugged her. "I think he knows, Mom," I said, and she smiled at me, then stood up quickly.

"Well, I didn't mean to interrupt, sweetie. I just came to tell you Jesse called. Let me know if you need any help."

"I will," I promised. She sniffed again and left me. I pushed my box aside and got on my feet. Jesse would probably get worried if I was much later.

I decided to take my first box of stuff over that afternoon, just so Jesse wouldn't get any bright ideas about taking over my house.

Um, I mean our house.

Jesse didn't seem to mad when I came in with my box and put it in the closet. Well, until he saw me.

"What is in that?" he asked.

"Just some of my things I wanted bring over. So I wouldn't have to do it all at once, you know."

Jesse scrutinized me with those black eyes of his and sighed. "Just as long as you don't get it into your head that you are moving in before we are married, Susannah."

"Why would you think that? And what do you mean, 'get into your head'?"

"Well, _querida_, when you get an idea into your head it usually stays there."

"Are you saying I'm stubborn?" I accused, and he looked up for a minute before answering.

"Actually, that is _exactly_ what I wanted to say. Thank you, Susannah."

"Well don't worry," I said harshly. "I wouldn't dream of moving in with you until we're married."

Jesse must have felt kind of bad for agitating my little snap, because he quickly put his arms around me and hugged me close to his chest. "You smell wonderful," he whispered to me, first in English then in Spanish. I replied with a grunt. "Are you ready to go, _querida_?" he asked.

"I guess," I mumbled, and rubbed my cheek against the little bit of chest hair poking through the V of his Ralph Lauren polo shirt. Why he didn't keep that wonderful chest and those awesome abs uncovered all the time I just don't know. Sometimes I miss him being a ghost. But not often.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7L7_

Best Buy was in the same little shopping center that the furniture store had been in, so it took us about thirty minutes to get there. (Jesse, being Mr. Cheapskate, said we couldn't eat anywhere nice. So in return I tortured him by refusing to eat anywhere else but Taco Bell. Jesse hates Taco Bell. He calls it Taco Hell.) As soon as we stepped foot in the store I towed him to the back, where the huge wall of TVs was. We both looked up at them in awe.

"I like that one," I said, pointing to a 60-inch flat screen.

"I like that one too," Jesse said.

"Cool. So what size do we want for our bedroom?"

"Bedroom!" he laughed, but not humorous way. "We are _not_ getting a TV for the bedroom."

"Why not?" I whined, surprised Jesse had said TV.

"Because, we will not be using the bedroom as an entertainment room."

"I beg to differ," I chimed in, and he gave me one of those looks. "Jesse, I have always had a TV in my room. It's just normal! Most people do!"

He looked up at the wall of TVs, his arms crossed, then back down at me. Then a boyish smile broke his frown. "I'll get you a TV for our room, Susannah," he told me. "On certain grounds."

"Like what?"

He smiled broader. "Well, you have to promise me you won't move in until we're married. And I am only saying that because you usually get your way with me. And you have to start going to mass with me."

"Ugh!" I groaned. Jesse had always been on my back about this church thing. "Okay, how about I'll start going to mass with you when I move in. That seems fair."

Jesse looked at me a minute, the said, "Deal. And no, we cannot get the 60-inch one if we are going to get two."

"Can they both add up to 60 inches?" I asked. I was on a roll tonight.

"Sure," he said, a little sour, and I kissed his cheek.

"Thank you," I whispered to him, and he rolled his eyes and hugged me loosely with one arm. All we had to do was make eye contact with a sales person and about five of them were on us. But a pretty blond girl got to us first.

"Can I help you with a TV today?" she asked. I could tell she had been waiting for us, especially by the way she looked at Jesse.

"Yes," we both answered at the same time, and Jesse (after an annoyed look at me; I guess it was the "man's job" to buy the TV) finished, "We were looking getting two."

"Well, we have a great deal on that 80-inch Sony over there,"

Jesse bit his lip when he looked at the one she pointed out, and the sales girl--her name was Amanda--nearly fell out in the floor. "We actually are looking for something a bit smaller," Jesse said.

"Well all of our Sony's are actually on sale, 40-inches and up. And if you buy two, I will be glad to cut you a deal."

_Oh my God!_ This girl was so annoying! She looked like she was still in high school, too. (Wait. That makes me feel old. She _acts_ like she's still in high school. That's better.)

"How about those two?" I asked, pointing out the two I had originally looked at, a 40-inch and a 30-inch. The sales girl looked at me like she just noticed I was there.

"Oh," she said, seeing the two I pointed out. She kind of had that rich girl accent. You know, kind of like the girls on _Clueless_. "Those two aren't on sale, though."

I was very proud when Jesse walked over to the TVs and completely ignored the Amanda girl. "I like them. They look very nice, actually." He turned back to the sales girl. "I think we'll take these two," he told her.

She gave me that rich girl sneer, then smiled at Jesse. "Just let me get your information," she said sweetly.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

The TVs came the next day (Amanda had some "friends" in delivery) and I made sure I was there when they were delivered. The Geek Squad guys hooked them up to the satellite and hung them on the wall and everything, and they left about the time Jesse got home from work. While he was taking his shower I went and got us Chinese (Jesse loved Chinese and Japanese, which was a huge shock to me. We always went to his favorite Japanese restaurant on his birthday, the one where they cook in front of you. He loved it.) While he was getting dressed I got the blankets off the bed and made a huge pallet on the floor (we still had no furniture), found a good movie in the box I had brought, and set out our dinner. Jesse came out looking a little surprised, then smiled when he saw what I had done.

"I love this," he told me quietly, about halfway through the movie. I took another spoonful of ice cream out of the pint I had gotten from the fridge (which, at the moment, was sitting in the middle of the--or what would soon be--our kitchen) for us to share.

"What?" I asked. "This movie?"

"Well, yes, the movie. And the dinner, and the dessert," he said, motioning towards the ice cream. I laughed. "But most importantly I love you."

"Aw," I whispered, and kissed him. He was so good! "Thank you, Jesse."

"You're welcome," he whispered back.

I saw Spike, who had been laying several feet away, slowly creep towards us after I kissed Jesse. Stupid cat. I watched him curl up at Jesse's feet and start purring like the fake sweet-and-innocent cat he was, and then I watched him slowly take his nails and dig them into the carpet.

"CAT!" I screamed, and Spike jumped a foot off the ground and went running to the front door, which he started scratching on next. "Jesse!" I yelled. "Go stop that damn cat! He's ripping up my house!"

Jesse jumped up and yanked open the front door, and Spike went running into the night. I paused our movie and went to look at the threshold of the door, which now had small chunks out of it. "That's it!" I told Jesse loudly. "Next time that stupid cat comes in, I'm taking him to the vet to have him de-clawed."

"You can't do that," Jesse, as always, argued. "What will he do when he goes outside?"

"Jesse, that cat hardly ever goes out anymore. You've spoiled him rotten. And I would say make him stay outside, but I know that won't work."

Jesse stared at me, those big black eyes debating, and finally he sighed. "All right. Whatever, Susannah. Let's just finish our movie."

By the end of the movie Jesse had fallen asleep, and I turned on _America's Next Top Model_ while I stoked his hair. I hoped he wouldn't wake up, and I could stay the night. I had stayed over with him before, one time when he had the flu and one time when we stayed out really late and he wouldn't let me drive home. The time he was sick I slept on the couch and the other time, after fighting over it, _he_ slept on the couch. But this, of course, was different. This was our house, not his apartment. I had every right to stay over.

I was busy playing with a little curl at the nape of his neck when I saw something out of the corner of my eye. I turned, just slightly, to see it better. Our picture--the one of me and Jesse at the restaurant he had taken me to for my last birthday--that I had sat on the mantle was floating in mid-air. I looked a little harder and saw that it was held by a woman. Well, young woman, really. She couldn't be more than seventeen or eighteen, with long, wavy black hair. And a hoop skirt.

I know what you're thinking: Maria. I thought so too, at first. But I knew Maria couldn't have come back if she wanted. (And trust me, she probably did.)

But then the girl turned, and I saw her face. It wasn't Maria at all. This girl's face was so much softer and kinder than Maria's could have ever been.

She looked up from the picture and at us, and I thought for a second she had seen me looking. I quickly hid my face in Jesse's chest, but just enough to where I could still watch her. I then realized she wasn't looking at _us_, really, but more at Jesse.

She sat the picture down gently on the mantel and slowly walked over to us, brown eyes shining. She bent over gracefully and, with a slow, shaking hand, stroked Jesse's cheek.

I was about to go all _Thighs of Steel Kickboxing_ on her, but stopped when I saw her face up close. Black eyes, perfect nose, full lips...

This wasn't Maria at all. This was one of Jesse's sisters.

I caught my breath at the same time Jesse grunted under his sister's touch and started to wake. The young Miss de Silva caught her breath, too, and disappeared quickly.

I sat up to try to grab her, and when I realized she was gone I looked down into Jesse's questioning, but smiling, eyes. "Are you alright, _querida_?" he asked, and I nodded quickly.

"Fine. Just fine. I guess I should be getting home." I stood up and fixed my shirt, but Jesse grabbed my hand.

"Why don't you just call your mother and tell her you are staying over? I don't want you out driving this late."

I looked at the clock I had plugged in and sat on the floor earlier: 1:36 a.m. "I, um, I guess. I have some pajamas. But there's no couch or anything." I couldn't believe I was arguing _Jesse's_ side to this, but seeing his sister had really freaked me out.

"That's alright," he told me quietly. "We can sleep in the bed. I trust you, _querida_," he said with a wink, and I smiled half-heartedly.

"Okay." My mom answered on the first ring, which I had expected, and with a sigh of relief said she would see me tomorrow at dinner. Tomorrow was Sunday.

Jesse had re-made the bed while I changed into my pajama pants and t-shirt, and had already gotten in on his side of the bed. I smiled at him and climbed in on the opposite side. He reached over and kissed my forehead. "Are you alright?" he asked softly. I smiled and snugged into his chest.

"Just fine," I told him. The dark was eerie, even to me. Jesse had cracked open our windows so we could hear the ocean, and soft rain had started to fall onto our metal roof. The sound usually would have relaxed me, but tonight it creeped me out. Why had, all of the sudden, his sister decided to come around? Was Jesse in trouble? Was something going to happen? Or did she just want to see her big brother get married? Probably not. Had they never re-met out there, when he was a ghost? Was she here because of me?

I listened to the rain again, and the soft roll of thunder far away. I heard Spike, somehow, crawl through the window. Stupid cat. Better than him clawing down the front door, I guess.

I listened to Jesse, his breathing slowed. I very gently placed my hand on his chest and felt his heartbeat, something I did all the time. I loved that he had one.

His face was so innocent when he slept that I could always imagine what he looked like when he was little. I wondered, in the back of my mind, if we had a son would he look like that, too?

"Hey, Jesse," I said quietly.

"What?" he whispered.

"I, um..." I almost said it. About his sister, I mean. Almost. But I changed my mind. "I, um, let Spike in since it's raining."

Jesse squeezed me under the blankets. "My Susannah, heart of gold," he whispered, and kissed my head. I smiled and stroked his cheek, then turned the TV on and put it on mute.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7L7_

I spent the next morning finishing the kitchen while Jesse planted some stuff outside. I was a little skeptical about this when he first told me, but he only laughed when I admitted it. "Susannah," he reminded me. "I grew up planting things. I do know a thing or two about it, _querida_."

Something inside me said to trust him, and when I walked outside later I was glad I had.

"How does it look?" he asked, and I put and arm around his waist.

"Fantastic. Really. It makes Ben's yard look like something in front of a double-wide."

Jesse laughed. "I'll tell him you said so." He took a dirty arm over his sweaty face. "I'm going to go take a shower. You said you wanted to go look at paint, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Be out shortly, then," he said, and kissed the top of my head. I walked around our front yard. Hibiscus bushes grew in front of the windows, flowers in the pots I had bought lined the three stairs to the front door. Jesse had planted some kind of climbing vine-flower thing under the mailbox. In the corner of our yard, next to our driveway, he had revived the dying palm tree that came with the house. He had figured out how to use the sprinkler system, too.

"Wow," I said to myself, and went back inside. My part--the kitchen--looked like crap compared to what he had done. I got a broom and started sweeping up the sheet rock dust that covered the floor.

And then I saw something out of the corner of my eye again. Jesse's sister. I turned around quickly and saw her face freeze, then she started to disappear.

"Wait!" I yell, and ran to grab her arm. Her image cleared and she looked at me like I was crazy.

"You can see me?" she whispered, not from shock, but from not using her voice for so long. She cleared it and asked again, this time louder.

"Yes, I can. I'm Suze, Jesse's fiance."

"Su-su..."

"Susannah."

"Susannah. That is a pretty name. I am Josefina, Jesse's--"

"Favorite little sister," I finished.

She blushed. "Well, I don't know about favorite. But I am his sister, yes." She looked around, big black eyes taking everything in. "Is Jesse here? I thought I just saw him..."

"Oh, he's taking a shower. Um, bath," I restated when I saw her perplexed expression. "Bath. He'll be out in a minute. Would you like to sit down?"

"Yes, thank you." She sat gracefully on a lawn chair I had brought in earlier. "So you, you are a mediator, right? And Jesse is as well?"

This _was_ a little weird, sitting here talking to Jesse's sister. Or Jesse's sister's ghost, really. "Um, yeah. Yes. We are."

"So I heard," she said, nodding a little. "Do you live here as well?"

I saw her look around at our empty house. "Well, we're moving our stuff in. Jesse's just living here now, and I'm going to move in after we're married." I heard the water shut off in the other room.

"It is a lovely little house. I saw Jesse working on the yard. He has always loved flowers. He use to plant them when he was little and give them to all my sisters and me."

"Really?" This sister thing might not be so bad. Jesse had always been tight-lipped about growing up; I think it hurt him to talk about his family. I mean, it would upset me. But still, I really wanted to know.

"Oh, yes." She laughed. "Jesse is such a wonderful boy. Man."

The bedroom door opened and Jesse stepped out, hair wet (but still perfect) and wearing jeans and a button-down Banana Republic shirt.

"Susannah," he started, "do you like this..." He dried up when he lifted his gaze. His eyes went from me to Josefina and back again. "Jose--Josefina?" he whispered. Only he said his J like H, and with the killer accent. "Is...are you...Wow." She stood up when he walked over. He took both of her hands and kissed each one. But in a brotherly way, you know. "Josefina, you...I tried to find someone for so long. Why now?"

_Great_ ice breaker, Jesse.

"We looked as well!" she exclaimed. "I mean, Marta and I. She...she is gone now, though. When her sick granddaughter regained her health."

"Marta," Jesse whispered, then said something in Spanish.

And she answered. In Spanish. Of course.

Well, no dirt to be gathered here. I went back to sweeping up the kitchen, and after that I cleaned the bathroom up, and after that made the bed, and cleaned out the fridge, and found the cat and threw him outside. When I had nothing left to do I went and sat on the floor, listening to their Spanish going back and forth. And finally, they where done.

And Josefina disappeared.

"What did you do?" I asked, and Jesse gave me a dark look.

"We talked. And she wanted some time to think." He came and took my hand, then gave me a big wet kiss. "Ready?"

And that was it. I mean, he looked completely normal. Like he hadn't just seen his long-lost sister's ghost, or anything.

"Um, I guess. If you hadn't screwed up my make-up with that big slobbery kiss."

He laughed and led me outside. "You don't even need it, Susannah," he told me.

I mean, I know he might seem okay on the outside, but _knew_ on the inside it was _completely_ opposite. One-hundred percent. Jesse was just like that. Which really bugged me. I mean, all I wanted to know was a thing or two about him growing up, or what he did as a ghost (before me, of course), or what his mom and sisters where like. That kind of stuff.

But _no_. Jesse had to be all "mysterious" about it. Maybe I should Ti-Vo some more Oprah for him or something.

Jesse made small talk on the way to Home Depot, and when we got there he agreed to everything I said. Even when I held up a coral pink and asked, "What about this for the living room?"

"I think it would look great," he said. I rolled my eyes and put the sample back.

"Jesse, stop acting like that."

"Like what?"

I groaned and pulled him over to the greens. "I mean acting like you aren't thinking about your sister. I know you are." He didn't exactly reply, so going through different shades of green, I asked, "What did you two talk about?"

He picked up a few samples of his own. "Just about what happened. To me. And my--our family. And I got a little angry with her, so she left. She'll be back though. It just might be a few days."

"Does stubbornness run in your family?" I joked.

He put an arm around me. "It runs in your as well, _querida_. I will hate to see our children."

I laughed and held up my three favorites. "I think we should try these three."

"I do too, Susannah. Are we done?" he asked, and I laughed.

"Hardly! We still have to pick out for the bedroom, and the bathroom, and the guest bed- and bathrooms, and the kitchen..."

Jesse groaned, and I grabbed his hand a dragged him down the paint isle.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7_

Here r the sites (I had to space them out or it wouldn't work right--so backspace the spaces when you copy/paste!)

**The ring**: http:// www.tiffany .com/Engagement/Item .aspx?sku19861015--I was also looking at the "round cut brilliant with bead-set band", but I was just in love with this one

**paint**: **Guest bath/bedroom**-http:// www6.homedepot .com/paintinspiration/index .html? ("red tomato") **Bedroom**--http:// www6.homedepot .com/paintinspiration/index .html? (color of room) **Kitchen&Bathroom**--http:// www6.homedepot .com/paintinspiration/index .html? (color of walls) Living room--http:// www6.homedepot .com/paintinspiration/index .html? (strawberry freeze--this color looks tres bien on walls!)

**TV:**http:// www.bestbuy .com/site//olspage.jsp?id pcmcat141200050012&typecategory


	5. Chapter 5

THIS CHAPTER HAS BEEN RELOADED WITH thE URL'S!

_I have found the brides maids dresses! Go to http:// vera wang .com/ maids/ (no spaces, no parenthesis) and look at dress 20! It is gorgeous! And if you haven't seen 27 Dresses yet, you need to! It is awesome! I am in love with the James Marsden guy! (Who knew he was Corny on Hairspray and Lon on The Notebook? It sure didn't. He was in Enchanted, too. But this is his best character yet!)_

_L7L7L7L7 _

My winter break started the week before Thanksgiving. Which was awesome, especially since it lasted through the first week of January, but I was bored by the second day. Seriously. I had nothing to do.

Well, except work on my house. And looking at wedding stuff on the Internet. But that was about it. A cold front had ruined my beach weather, and the tanning salon-slash-gym-slash-spa I went to was closed for "repairs". (Kristen told me they had a sick case of ring worm break out in the tanning beds and they had to shut it down and get new ones. The next day I made Jesse check to make sure I didn't have it. Not that I think I did, it was just a good excuse to take my shirt off in front of him.) So here I was, stuck at home.

But the next week was something to look forward to, because Friday was my favorite holiday: Black Friday.That's right, Kristen and I were going to get up at midnight and go stand in front of the mall for mind-numbing hours until they opened the doors and we all start running in there like a herd of hormone induced cattle. I couldn't wait.

And then the next Wednesday was my birthday. I was excited about that, too, since Jesse was probably going to take me somewhere special. He always did.

So all I had to do was make it through Thanksgiving.

Which I did, but barely. By the end of that night I was so disgusted with my family that I begged Jesse to "take me home, just take me home", meaning the house that is partly under my name and that is willed to me in the case that Jesse dies again, the house that I still don't live in...But, of course, Jesse refused. Nicely, but still flatly.

Oh, well. Not that I would be at home much longer, right?. I hope own own family doesn't turn out so annoying.

I met Kristen at her apartment at twelve, and we ventured into the night not soon after, heat on and radio blasting.

I had one-thousand, five hundred dollars and twenty-six cents crammed in my wallet, which was the total of working my last two summers at the Pebble Beach Golf Resort. And by last I mean _last_. As in never again. _Ever_.

"What're you going to spend it on?" Kristen asked when I told her this, and I pulled out a list from my Kavu purse.

"Um, bedspread, sheets, towels, new purse, dress I saw on the Internet, new pillows, a watch for Jesse for a Christmas, a book he wanted for Christmas--"

"Okay!" Kristen interrupted. "I got it."

I looked over at her. "How much do you have to spend?"

She reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a shiny red American Express that said, in even shinier letters, Jeremy K. Branes on it. "Dad won't miss it," she said. "He has two."

Kristen was from L.A., but had moved here when her parents got divorced when she was in high school. Her mom and dad still had Thanksgiving together, though, "for her and her sister". And, luckily, her dad stayed at her apartment.

"Sweet," I said, and turned up the radio.

We made it to the mall in no time flat (there wasn't much traffic at one in the morning) and was at the front doors before the real crowd got there. But we paid our price.

It was freezing.

"I heard this story on the news about this lady who was waiting like we are to get in the mall on Black Friday, and she was so cold the blood actually frozen in her veins."

I looked over at Kristen. "Seriously?"

"Seriously," she said. "But she did live in like, Canada, I think."

The lady in the fold-out lawn chair next to us was staring at us, huddled together against the doors of Macy's with two jackets on and a blanket around us. But we should have been staring at her, sitting in that pink lawn chair with a battery-operated heater at her feet. I gave her the evil eye and asked, "Do they even celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada?"

"Good question," Kristen said, and I saw the guard coming towards the other side of the door with the key. I nudged Kristen and we both stood up.

Over the music speakers we heard, "Good morning, shoppers! Welcome to the beginning of the Christmas shopping season! We ask for no pushing, hitting, or fighting on Macy's premises. If you do engage in such activities, you will be removed from the store. Thank you all, and have a wonderful shopping experience!"

And then the doors were opened. And the next thing I knew I was on the ground.

If I had to describe it as something, it would say it was like being run over by horses. Or over-weight middle aged housewives who only leave their house to get replenished on Slim-Jims and Little Debbies. But no matter who was stepping on me, it hurt like crap.

Kristen must have noticed, since the next thing I remember she was pulling me to my feet and towards the bathroom. I even think I black out for a few seconds, because the thing I remember after that was being helped down onto the cold floor and Kristen asking "Are you okay? Suze, you okay?"

Yeah. I was fine. Peachy, even.

"What happened?" I groaned.

"You kind of got trampled," she said with a chuckle, and helped me to my feet. I looked in the mirror and groaned. My bang poof was completely ruined.

"God, that hurt." I heard the screams of a fight outside the bathroom, and then men's voices breaking it up.

"Ready to get back in it?" she asked, and I groaned.

"I guess. I just hope this wasn't a omen or anything." Kristen just laughed.

And it turns out I was exactly right. About the omen, I mean.

The first thing that happened was the fight in got into with this lady over a Coach purse--a Coach purse _I _had seen and picked up first, a Coach purse _I_ had been hunting down for_ three weeks now_. And I did get it, as well as a massive scratch down the side of one of my arms from the lady's fake nails.

The second thing happened on the elevator, when we were just trying to go to Starbucks, and two ladies got in to it over some blender they had seen at Sears. I mean really. A blender?

But before you can say _Black and Decker_, the ladies were on the floor trying to claw each other's eyes out. Over a _blender_. And of course Kristen and I got pulled into it as well, and received quite a few bruises and scratches.

And the third thing that happened--and this was the whammy--was Paul. Yes, _that_ Paul.

Kristen had wanted to look at drapes after we had ate lunch, and I wanted to look at toasters. Simple as that. The toasters were kind of off by themselves in the store, next to all the skillets and stuff. I was looking at a very nice toaster (it was stainless steel with four little slots, even though Jesse was the only one who ate toast out of the two of us. But best to be prepared, though. And it wasn't like I was buying it. It was going on my bridal registry.) when I spotted Paul not ten feet away, looking at plates. Or really, he was following a tall, skinny blond lady looking at plates.

As soon as I saw him I ducked behind a display and started crawling for the escalator. You see, Paul and I really haven't been in close contact since high school. Not because he was still stalking me, or whatever, it was just that the rest of my high school career--after the whole Jesse incident--Paul had been really annoying. Like the geek that has the crush on you and rushes to your side when ever you need a lab partner, or can't open your locker, or your being chased by a sixties biker chick who was killed in a motorcycle accident.

But the only problem was Paul was no geek.

So here I was, crawling on the nasty hard wood floor, when a pair of Italian leather shoes almost stepped on my hand. I swallowed--hard--and looked up into Paul's blue eyes.

He was smiling his hot little smile when he bent over to help me up. "Of all the places to see you, Suze," he said conversationally.

"I, um, just lost my earring," I said as happily as I could.

"They seem to both be in your ears, though."

"Um, yeah. I found it. Well, got to go." I lurched for the escalator, but Paul grabbed my hand and pulled me back.

"What is this?" he asked. I realized he was looking at my engagement ring.

Oh shit.

"It's, um. Me and Jesse are getting married." Why lie? He would probably fine out anyway.

"Oh. Wow, Jesse sure went all out on this little ring. He must have been saving up for years."

I yanked my hand out of his grasp. "For your information, Jesse is a resident doctor at the hospital. And he is making very good money, too."

"Aw," Paul purred. "A doctor and a nurse. How cute." I made a face at him, and he only laughed. "I'm sorry, Suze. It seems were always getting off on the wrong foot." He looked me up and down. "I miss talking to you," he said quietly.

Oh God, here I go again. "You do?"

"Of course. You're the only one like myself I had around. I wish we could have dinner sometime--all of us, Jesse included. In fact--" he pulled out a business card and gave it to me. "I'm trowing a little party for New Year's. If your not busy, give me a call."

I looked at the card--_Paul Slater, Attorney at Law_. "I, um, I guess we can make it."

"Great," he said with a smile. "And still give me a call." The blond he was with started calling him, and he sighed. "Live-in girlfriend. She thinks she can redo my house or something." He rolled his eyes and started to walk off, but turned around last minute. "I am invited to the wedding, right?"

I swear I have no idea what came over me next when I said, "Um, sure Yeah. I'll send you an invitation."

"Great," he said with a smile, and waved goodbye before disappearing into the mall chaos. I just groaned and sat down on the floor.

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse, who was working that day, called me later.

"What are you doing?" he asked, and for the first time in hours I forgot all about Paul.

"I'm actually registering at Sears. What are you doing?"

"Oh, just watching five very large men completely rebuild our bathroom."

"Seriously?" I squeaked.

"Seriously. They've already finished the kitchen."

"Really? Oh God, I can't wait to see it. Wait, I though you were working today."

He chuckled. "I did work today. It's six o'clock, Susannah. Aren't you sleepy?"

"Oh." I looked out the doors of the store. It was dark. "Wow. I guess so."

"When will you be leaving?"

"Oh, I guess in a few. I'll probably be over about eight."

"_Querida_..." he started, but changed his mind. "Drive safely, please."

"You know I will!" I said, and told him I love you, which had come to mean "goodbye" when we were on the phone. He said it back, and we hung up.

"Was that him?" the lady helping me register asked.

I smiled and nodded. "That was him."

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse was waiting when I got to our house, and took some of the bags I had brought in out of my hands.

"Wow," I said, meaning the kitchen. It was gorgeous. I sat down my bags and went over to it, where I opened all the cabinets and turned on all the eyes on the gas stove. The marble was beautiful, and the cabinets were perfect. Wonderful. Amazing. (And it looked fantastic with the leather furniture we had bough last week.)

I went and checked out the bathroom next, and when I saw it hugged Jesse so tight he squeaked a "You are welcome, Susannah."

I kissed him and grabbed his hand to pull him through the bathroom, still in a daze. Maybe it was because I hadn't slept in, oh, nineteen hours. But I didn't care. I crashed on the side of the bathtub and turned on the water.

"I guess you will be spending the night, then?" he asked, and I nodded.

"And taking a bath. Will you go get me a towel? I bought some today."

"Of course," he said with a chuckle. He left and was back before I noticed, and sat the towel down on the vanity and walked into the bedroomclosing the door behind him.

I sank into the warm water when the tub was full and closed my eyes.

And the first thing that popped into my head? Paul.

God, how in the world was I going to tell Jesse? He still hated Paul. I mean, I would too, if the scenario had been vice-verse.

What was I thinking? I still had every right in the world to hate Paul. I sighed. Maybe Father Dom's insights where finally getting to me.

And that reminded me. I needed to ask Father D. about marrying us. I knew he would, but I still need to ask.

And I need to go buy the paints we had decided on. And call about getting the cat declawed. And call about places to get married. And...and..._so_ much more.

_L7L7L7L7 _

I woke up the next morning in my bed--our bed. I sat up and threw the covers off, and saw that I was fully dressed.

Huh.

Jesse was in the living room watching TV and eating a sandwich. When he saw me he smiled and said, "Good afternoon, _querida_."

"Afternoon?" I asked, and looked at the clock. It was twelve-thrity. "I don't even remember going to bed."

He smiled at his sandwich. "You fell asleep in the bathtub."

Oh. Okay, Mr. Sneaky. "How did I get in the bed, then? And full dressed, I might add."

His eyes got big for a second, then he asked, "Would you like a sandwich?"

"No no no, Jesse," I said, coming over and sitting beside him. "You _are_ going to explain."

He got up quickly and went to wash his plate off. I sighed and put my feet up on the couch. "I would like to know when I have been sexually harassed, thank you."

"Susannah," he said angrily. I knew it would work. "You fell asleep in the bathtub and I laid you down in bed."

"And put a shirt, shorts, bra, and panties on me. Which you did a wonderful job of matching by the way." I loved saying panties to Jesse. It always made a little tongue-tied.

"Well, you were...naked, Susannah, what did you want me to do? Leave you in there?"

"No, no. I was just asking. I think it is very sweet that you love me so much you dressed me, even though your "morals" are so against seeing me naked, and all."

"I see women naked everyday. It _is_ part of my job description."

"So seeing me naked is like seeing any other women naked?"

I saw his shoulders tense at his little verbal mistake, then he sighed. "No, Susannah."

He came and sat beside me and looked into my eyes for a long minute. "I'm sorry for dressing you. I should have woken you up instead, I know, but you just looked so peaceful. I apologize."

"Oh, Jesse," I said, rolling my eyes. "I'm not mad or anything. I just think it isn't fair that you get to see me naked and I can't return the favor."

He got that exasperated look in his eye (the one he gives me all the time), stood up and started walking to the door. "I just can't win with you, Susannah," he said before walking outside.

Which was true. He couldn't.

I wondered where Josefina had gone off to. I hadn't seen her since the beginning of last week when her and Jesse got pissed at each other. Jesse had said it would take her awhile before she got over her stubbornness, or whatever, but I mean two weeks? Geeze. I wonder what he had said. (There was no doubt in my mind that _he_ was the one who had said something to make _her_ mad.)

Jesse had started watering his plants (I could see this plant thing was going to turn into something with him), so I went and got dressed. In the past week or so I had brought over some extra clothes and my make-up and stuff, since I had spent the night more than once. Five times, actually. But not that I'm counting.

I told Jesse where I was going and stole his car before he noticed. But hey, his car was so much nicer. And faster. And I happened to look _great_ in it too, might I add.

I got the paint I needed and stopped by the grocery store on my way back. (Jesse might have been a 19th century gentleman, but he still didn't know what to buy at a grocery store.)

And I took the long way home, too.

Jesse didn't even seem to notice that his car had ever gone missing, since he didn't mention it when he kissed me later. Or maybe it was because I was making dinner.

"What are you making?" he asked, lifting a pot lid. "It smells wonderful."

"Spaghetti," I said, concentration on trying to _not_ burn the meat. "You know, I can't wait until we're married."

"Why is that?" he asked while eating a noodle.

"Well, new pots and pans and a nice toaster and maybe a new strainer. Not to mention hot, steamy sex. You want a piece of meat?" I asked when he chocked on his noodle.

"Just where did that come from?" he asked.

"Um, I think a cow, Jesse."

"Not the meat," he said, exasperated again. "The comment."

"Oh, that. Well, it was just on my mind. Why don't you set the table?"

He looked at me for a minute, them got out the silverware and put it on the table. I smiled when he started mumbling Spanish. Can you blame a girl for testing the waters?

Sitting down to have dinner was kind of weird. It felt like we were already married or something. I mean, I had cooked for Jesse before, at his old apartment, but this was different. Because this was our house. The house where we would be eating dinners for the rest of our lives.

Well, not the rest of our lives, since we would probably move to a bigger house when we had kids or something, and after that probably end up in some nursing home together, but still. You get the gist.

I smiled at Jesse across the table. "So, um, what did you do today?"

"I work outside a little. And washed some clothes, which turned into washing most of your clothes as well." He eye-balled me.

"What?" I asked. "You could have separated them."

"I wasn't going to touch your nasty clothes," he said, impersonating me.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I though you were okay with touching my underwear now."

"Stop bring that up Susannah," Jesse snapped. "You got me off track. I wanted to say that I thought we agreed you weren't going to move in."

"I'm not moving in--"

"Or try to." He held my gaze. "You haven't been home in two days, _querida_."

"So you don't want me here!?" I yelled, and Jesse groaned in frustration.

"Why must you spin everything I say, Susannah? You know exactly what I mean. I love you. I just...I just don't want you to move in before we're married. Is that too hard to understand?"

"No," I mumbled. "I just don't get why you are so uptight about stuff."

"Like what?"

"Like sex, of instance. It's like you want to wave the bait in front of my face, but if i try to go for it your all "Oh, no, Susannah, it's bad for you". So what if it is? Don't get a say on my virginity anymore? Or do you control that as well?"

"What do you mean control?"

"You control everything I do!" I stood up and went to wag a finger in his face. "You control what I do, where I go, when I do stuff. News flash, Jesse. This is 2007! Not 1850!"

"I'm so very sorry I was _brought_ here to be with you," he yelled back, standing up.

I took a step back. He had never said anything like that before. Not ever. I grabbed my keys off the counter and stormed to the door. "You want space?" I yelled, fighting back stupid, pointless tears. "Fine. Hope you enjoy it. I don't know how I could love such a selfish person in the first place!"

"Neither do I!" he yelled back, and I slammed the door. And that was it.

I didn't get far before I had to pull over and cry my eyes out. I know. I was being a real big girl about it.

I mean, Jesse and I fought all the time. All the time. Yeah, over stupid stuff ninety percent of it, but still.

I knew it was what he had said. About me bringing him here, I mean. Maybe I was being selfish. I groaned and rubbed my face. Here was that old conflict again.

When I could see without the tears streaming down my face I got back on the road and drove home.

I though I was in the clear about no one seeing me when I hear Dopey yell, "Well looks who's back from here weekend fling. And I thought that you were still playing the virgin card." He stepped out of the kitchen, running to cut me off from going up the stairs.

"Bite me," I suggested when I walked past him.

"Hum, seems like Jesse got to you first."

I turned around a slapped him hard across the face.

"I swear to God I cannot wait to move out of this house!" I yelled as I stomped up the stairs. I got to my room and slammed the door, then flopped down on the bed.

It wasn't very long until I heard someone coming up the stairs. Andy knocked (he was about the only one who did) and cracked my door. "Brad says you punched him," he said.

"Slapped him, actually. And he deserved it. Trust me."

Andy chuckled and sat down in my desk chair. "I don't doubt he did. But I was actually here to see what was wrong. Is it something with Jesse?"

Where was my mom? "Yeah. It's no biggie, though. Just one of our weird little fights."

"Over what?"

Um, my virginity, actually. Yeah, you see, Jesse thinks every woman should be treated like they are from the eighteenth century, why I have a very different view on the matter...Yeah, right.

"It was about his cat. I wanted to get him declawed because he's tearing up the furniture, but Jesse won't let me. And some other stuff," I added when Andy threw me a skeptical look.

"Are you sure?"

"Well, um, no. It was something I would feel more comfortable talking to Mom about."

His eyes got big. "You're not..."

"Pregnant? Oh my God, no." Actually quite the opposite.

"Just making sure," he said, throwing up his hands. "I'll go get your mom."

"Um, Andy?" I called. "I really don't need her. I think I'm just going to have to work this one out on my own."

He stopped at the door and looked at me for a second. "Okay. Left over dinner's in the fridge, if you want it."

"No thanks," I told him. "I've, um, already ate."

_L7L7L7L7_

The next morning I woke up to a face full of flowers.

Sneezing, I sat up and read the note beside it. _Querida, I'm so very sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it at all. I love being here with you. Please find it in your heart to forgive your loving fiance. _

I picked up the bouquet and smelled it. Orchids would be beautiful at a beach wedding. And since Jesse had always given them to me, they had became my favorite.

I guess I wasn't that mad at Jesse. I mean, I could forgive and forget. But I was going to give him some serious space over the next few days.

_L7L7L7L7 _

On my birthday I got more orchids. A lot more.

Some on my pillow, some in my bathroom, and some on the window seat, which I thought was a nice touch, since that was still _Jesse's_ window seat. It always would be.

I had talked to him on the phone yesterday (I still was giving him space after are fight; but all was forgiven) and he had said his sister was back. I guess she had been playing delivery girl the past few days.

I went down stairs and ate a bowl of Froot Loops, and turned on the TV to watch my mom's morning show. No one was around to wish me a happy birthday, but she always did. On air. In front of thousands of viewers.

And, never fail, at the end of her broadcast she wished me a happy twenty-fourth. Which was okay, since she had done it every birthday since I was one.

The door bell rang not soon after, and I went to open it. I was expecting Jesse, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed with another bouquet of flowers, but I got a UPS man instead.

"Miss Simon?" he asked, and I nodded. He shoved a clipboard under my nose. "Sign, please."

I did and he handed me a big box. "Thanks," I told him, but he had already turned to leave. I shut the door and headed to the kitchen, where I undid the tape on each side with my fingernails. Some corny soap opera had come on; I put the TV on mute and took the top off the box.

Laying on top was a single, perfect orchid. I rolled my eyes and sat it down on the table. Then I ripped the tissue paper away from my present as fast as I could.

It was a dress silk. It held it up to see it better, and a gorgeous black Betsey Johnson dress unfolded in front of my eyes. It was beautiful. And it must have cost Jesse a pretty penny.

I looked back down in the box. Where the dress had been laying was a note, written in Jesse's perfect handwriting.

_Happy Birthday, My Dearest Querida. I though you would like this dress. As soon as I saw it I knew it would look wonderful on you. I was hoping you would accept my dinner innovation for this evening. I will pick you up at six o'clock if you do. And make sure to wear the dress. You look wonderful in black. _

I laughed and held it up to me. I must say, the man knew his couture.

Kristen called a little later.

"Hey girl," she said. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks." I dug through my closet for my strapless bra.

"So are we going to Beach Bodies for our spa day? Bikini Wax, my treat."

"Oh they opened it back up?" I found my lacy black strapless bra and threw it on my bed. Now if I could only find the panties that matched...

"Yeah. It turns out the ring worm was just a fungus. They came and disinfected everything."

"Oh. Good. Yeah, I'll met you at...noon?" I found them and threw them on my bed.

"Yeah, sounds great. See you there."

"You too," I said, and hung up the phone. I dug even farther and found a pair of heels that matched perfectly, then pulled out my _Cosmo_ magazine and started experimenting with new up-do's. I liked the wavy side ponytail the best. It was the only way my hair actually looked good pulled back.

Losing track of time, I pushed a headband through my hair and threw on a pair of sweats. I ran down the stairs to my car, grabbing an orchid on the way.

The Beach Bodies Spa was busy that afternoon, but Kristen had made reservations. We got manicures and pedicures first, then a massage and a facial. Then came the bikini wax.

Oh, God. I hated bikini waxes. They freaked me out. I don't know why I let Kristen (and Gina, when she visits in the summer) talk me into them. I mean why get some Oriental lady to do what you can do yourself--and a lot less painfully too, I might add.

But Kristen did pay for it, which was a nice gesture, I guess. Even if I couldn't walk strait for a few hours.

But in the end, that was okay. Because my my French manicure did look fabulous.

When I got home I turned on my shower and laid down on my bed. I reached behind me and picked up the letter, and traced my fingers over Jesse's flowing handwriting.

My cell phone rang in my purse (which almost gave me a heart attack) and I ran to answer it.

"Hello?" I gasped.

"Suze! My God, it's been forever!"

"Cee Cee! Wow, big city girl calling little old me? I'm touched!"

"Aren't you glad I remembered your birthday?"

"So glad," I laughed. "But--oh my God I've got to tell you! No, guess."

"Um, your pregnant."

My God, where was this coming from? "Um, no. I'm getting married!"

She laughed, and I heard a truck horn in the background. She must have been walking down the street. "Finally! How long did it take him?"

"Only eight years. And guess who's going to be a bridesmaid?"

"_Moi_?" she laughed. "I touched!"

"You should be! It _is_ only the social event that will rock Carmel for years to come."

She laughed again. "Well, just called to say a quick happy birthday. I've got a meeting in a few minutes. I'll call you later."

"You too," I said, and paused for a second before I hung up.

I took a long, hot shower, then took my time with my hair and make-up. But hey, it was my birthday. I wanted to look good. Besides, Jesse was probably taking me to that real swanky restaurant in the new Hilton they had just finished. I had been dropping hints for weeks about it.

I saw Jesse's headlights in my window and I did a last minute make-up check. I had to admit--I looked fabulous.

Jesse was talking to my mom--about coming to see the house, since she hadn't been in, oh, five days or so. (I had finished painting, though, and it did look really good.)

I got on the bottom landing of the stairs and cleared my throat loudly, and they both looked up. Jesse's slightly bored expression turned to amazement in an instant.

"_Querdia_," he whispered, and came forward to take both my hands. I blushed a deep red. "You look amazing," he said quietly.

"Suze," my mom said. "You look great! Where did you get that dress?"

"Jesse," I mused, taking his hand. He smiled a little shyly.

"It was a birthday present," he said.

My mom came over and spun me around. "It's beautiful!"

"Thanks," we both said, then I added, "Well, we don't want to lose our reservations."

"Oh, of course." My mom shooed us out the door. "Have a good time," she called when we started down the yard to the driveway.

"So," I asked after I had made sure she had shut the door, "where are you taking me?"

Jesse looked over at me with those sad eyes. "Oh, I'm sorry, I gave you the impression I was taking you somewhere?"

I punched his shoulder before he opened my door for me. He got in on his side a second later. "Of course you are. It's my birthday."

"I was just going to take you to Sandry's."

I groaned. Sandry's was the big grease trap that all the tourists went to. We both hated it.

Jesse smiled at me. "Where would you like to go?"

"You know," I mused. "That place..."

"The place I took you last year, right?"

I looked over at him. He sounded so sincere about it. Had he made reservations there? "Um, yeah, that place was nice. I really liked it."

"Oh, well I made reservations at that restaurant at the Hilton instead. I could change it if you wanted..."

I hit his arm again. "You are so mean to me," I told him.

He pulled up to the red light in town and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I don't mean to be mean," he said. "I just love seeing you flustered."

The light turned green again. "Flustered? What kind of eighteenth-century word is that?"

"A good one," he replied, imitating me.

"Ha-ha, you are _so_ funny."

"I am, aren't I?"

I rolled my eyes. It took forever to get to the restaurant, but it was so worth it. Jesse had reserved a seat on the deck that faced the beach, and luckily it had warmed up the past day or two.

"Wow," I told him when he held out my chair for me. "This is nice."

"Thank you, _querida_," he said, taking his own seat. "It took me two weeks to get this table."

"Now I remember why I love you so much," I whispered when the waiter walked up. Jesse smiled back at me and order our drinks. While the waiter was going over (and over) all the specials, I looked out at the beach. The water was beautiful, even at night, and the sand looked cool and smooth.

"We'll have to go on a walk," Jesse said when the waiter left.

"That would be nice. I can't remember the last time we walked on the beach."

"So you really like the dress?" he asked. "Because if you are just trying to spare my feelings..."

"Jesse! I love it! It is a great present. But I do want to know who helped you pick it out."

He looked at me for a second before answering, "My sister."

"She did really? She liked it?"

"Well, out of the ten or so it came down to."

See, this sister thing _is_ good. "Does she like me? Your sister, I mean."

Jesse shrugged those strong shoulders. "She likes you. She just would like to get to know you better. But she knows you and I are...meant to be together."

We exchanged one of our secret smiles.

Jesse told me to order whatever I wanted. And I did. We started out with salads, hot garlic bread, and this fantastic spinach-cheese dip. Then came dinner: we both had a steak, think and juicy and tender, and I had the big loaded, twice baked potato on the side. Then, for dessert, then brought out a chocolate cake with a bowl of that really fancy whipped cream, and fresh fruit to go on top. Then a bottle of champagne, which Jesse opened and toasted me with.

"To you, my dear _querida_," he said, and raised his glass.

"To many more birthdays together." I clinked my own glass with his, then leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Let's take that walk," he whispered.

We must have walked for two hours, just him and me and our empty champagne glasses. We talked about a lot of things, like his sisters and mom and stuff. He wanted to know about me growing up, too, and I told him all about that. When we finally started to walk back to the car I told him, "This has been the best night of my life."

He put his arm around me and hugged me close. "It's not even over yet," he whispered.

"It isn't? What else do you have for me?"

"Just...another surprise." We got to the car and he opened my door for me.

"Jesse, you need to stop spending money on me."

"I didn't. But I promise, it is something you want. Something you have been wanting for a while, actually."

We had started to pull out of the parking lot now, and I turned up the radio, then turned it back down. "Wait, what?"

"What, Susannah?"

"What do you mean, "something I've been wanting"? Jesse, are you...Are we...?"

He looked over at me, his face soft in the blue dashboard lights. "Do you still want to?"

"Yes! Of course! So you're ready?"

He nodded.

Oh my God. Oh my God! This was the best night of my life! The night I had been waiting for for eight years! But why now? Unless...

"You aren't doing this because of our fight, are you?"

"No," he said, like it was a silly idea. "But after our fight I did decide that we should. But not because of it. Did that make sense?" he asked, and I laughed, and not just because that was funny.

"That made perfect sense," I told him. He took my hand and held it the whole way home--I trip that seemed five times longer back. When we finally did get there I ran to the door before he could even get out of the car, and waited impatiently while he unlocked it, kissing his neck and cheek while I waited. Finally he swung it open, and picked me up in his arms to carry me to the bedroom.

Okay, I'll admit it. I wasn't all calm and sexy during this whole thing. No, no, quite the opposite. I was literally freaking out. So bad, even, that Jesse stopped and asked me several times if I didn't want to do this. Of course he, on the other hand, was _so_ calm and _so_ sexy that it made me feel like a spaz. I don't think there is one thing in the world that Jesse isn't good at.

And let me tell you, I found one more that night.

Later on we laid in the bed, looking out the windows facing the beach. The sun was coming up over the water, and it was beautiful.

"Have you ever seen a sunrise, Susannah?" he whispered.

I shook my head, then asked, "Did you enjoy yourself, Jesse?"

He laughed. "I most certainly did. And yourself?"

"Oh, God," I said, turning on my back and putting my hand on his shoulder. "I hated it."

"Hmm," I grunted. "Is that why you cried?"

"Oh, shut up," I told him. So what if I did cry a little? I saw a tear or two of his own welling up. Which I quickly pointed out.

"That," he said, "was because of the laugh I was holding back."

"About what?"

"Those funny noises you were making."

"Look who's talking!" I said back, then punched his arm. He winced and hugged me, halfway laying on top of me.

"I love you," he whispered, in English and in Spanish.

"I love you, too," I whispered, and kissed him one more time before I went to sleep.

_Well. That was an interesting chapter. Here is the dress Jesse bought her: http:// www. betsey johnson. com/ EveningCasinoDress/pd/np/1140/p/3831 .html (no spaces) _

_Please go check it out!!!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Thank to all my reviewers btw. Y'all r AWESOME! And I promise no URL problems in the future. (Let me clarify that Jesse has been working for approximately a year and a half as a res. doctor. idk about the math, just humor me)_

I woke up the next morning to the sun shining brightly in my eyes.

"Jesse," I groaned. "Go shut the blinds." He said nothing. "_Jesse_," I said, and turned over to hit his shoulder, but he wasn't there.

Oh yeah. It was a Thursday. He had gone to work. Duh.

Feeling a bit dejected, I went and got some clothes on (looking at myself in the mirror first--but no, still same old Suze) and then ventured into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. There I saw, propped up against the coffee maker, a little piece of paper folded in half with my name on the front.

Forgetting the cereal, I grabbed the note and unfolded it.

_Susannah, I am sorry for leaving so early. But I will be back after five, and we can go have dinner. I love you, Jesse. _

_P.S. If you see Josafina tell her I will talk with her tomorrow. _

That was it? See you later and, oh, by the way, if you see my _dead_ sister will you tell her I'll talk to her later?

Wow Jesse. Real romantic.

"You needed to see me?" Josafina asked behind me, and I jumped a foot off the ground. She must have mistaken my thinking about her as calling her. (Which still happens all the time.)

"Um, not really. But Jesse wanted me to tell you something." She looked at me with those big brown eyes, and it was almost like I was looking into Jesse's. "He wanted to me to say that, um, he will talk to you tomorrow about whatever. He was going to talk to you about."

She kept looking at me, a bit confused, then nodded. I still don't think she got it, though.

I started my coffee and poured myself a bowl of Special K (hey, I was in a six and keeping it that way), then sat down at the kitchen table across from Josafina.

"So," I started, "what did Jesse--" the doorbell rang, and I apologized quickly and went to answer it. Looking out the side window, I noticed my mom's car. "Oh, um, Josafina, that's my mom. You might want to..."

"Oh," she said. "Of course. Tell Jesse I will be back later." And she disappeared. Just like that.

I opened the door, and my mom grabbed me up in a hug. "It looks fantastic!"

"Mom, you haven't even seen everything," I whispered. She grabbed my hand and pulled me into the house.

"Suze!" she said. "Everything looks great! I can't believe you did this all by yourself."

"Wow, Mom. Thanks."

"Oh, you know what I mean." She had pulled me into the bedroom, and suddenly I felt very awkward when she saw the bed, with the sheets all tangled up and the comforter halfway on the floor. And there was that vibe in the air, too. That _I Know What You Did Last Night _kind of vibe.

"Um, I painted in here, too," I said quickly, and threw the comforter back on the bed.

"I know. It looks fantastic. And the bathroom is just gorgeous." She went to look at it, and I breathed a sigh of relief and followed her. "I hope you don't mind, but I set up a consultation at Pebble Beach Resort," she said, admiring the picture of me and Jesse I had hung up.

"For what?" I asked, and somewhere in the back of my mind thought of that _Bridezilla_ episode where the mother had picked out everything for her daughter's wedding.

"A consultation," she said, giving me that you're-such-a-silly-little-bride look.

"Consultation? For...?"

"You said you wanted to get married on the beach, didn't you?"

Whoa. Wait. "So you made it for me?"

"Of course. Wedding dates go quickly, Suze. The planner said she was glad I called; she had a cancelation and can squeeze us in at noon."

"At noon? Holy crap, mom, I've got to get ready!"

"Well go ahead," she said, starting to walk out of the bedroom. "And dress nice, Suze."

I rushed through my shower, then blow-dried my hair and straitened it, put on some eye make-up, and pulled a beachy looking summer dress out of my closet. I looked in the mirror once more before I left, and I must say I looked pretty good for thirty minutes notice. In fact, Jesse would have been all over me.

_L7L7L7L7 _

The Pebble Beach Golf Resort was kicking this time of year. Really. I didn't know so many people had the same urge I did--to take a long vacation over the holidays.

Barbie--that was the wedding planner's name, seriously--was waiting for us when we got to the lobby of the hotel, and, after making friendly introductions, we followed her to the restaurant. It was a kind of swanky place, so I was glad I had worn a dress.

"Let's start with the obvious," Barbie said after we ordered our drinks. "When you you like to get married?"

"Um." I fidgeted a little under her blue-contacted gaze. "Well, in the spring, I guess. Or early summer."

She whipped out an iPhone and started tapping on it. "Let's see...the 23rd of May is open, as well as May 27th and May 30th. Then I have a June 1st, a June 3rd, a June 17--"

"June 3rd," I said, and my mother and Barbie both looked up at me. "June 3rd sounds...good." Actually, it sounded wonderful. I don't know what it was, but it just sounded...right. June 3rd...June 3rd.

"Terrific," Barbie said. She small talked us over lunch, then took us out to the beach the weddings were held on.

I came to the end of the boardwalk and smiled. The sand, the waves...everything was perfect.

"Now," Barbie said, slipping on a pair of Chanel sunglasses, "we have the ceremonies here, of course, and the reception is usually held in the restaurant. We supply the caterers and wait staff, but you have to supply the cake, the florist, the person of choice to marry you..."

God, she just went on and on. Actually, she did remind me of this Barbie I had one time--it was one of the ones that talked, and my mom's cat chewed it up, and it just kept saying "You look like a Barbie girl!" over and over.

That's what this lady reminded me of. A chewed-up Barbie.

I stopped paying attention to her and started looking around. And that's when I saw her. This crazy looking lady in cocktail dress walking on the beach.

Well, she didn't look _crazy_ crazy. Actually she was pretty. Very tan and skinny, but with a J-Lo butt. Very pretty, actually. It kind of made me jealous.

Well, until I noticed that she kind of glowed and that the wind didn't blow back her ridiculously think black hair. That's when I decided I was better off, you know, alive.

"Suze?" my mom broke in, and I looked up at her. "Barbie asked you a question."

"Oh. I'm sorry. I was just...admiring the beach."

"I was wondering how you and your fiancé met."

"Um, through a friend, actually." I hate BSing people, but it was for their own good. Really.

"Oh," she said, like it was the most unromantic thing she had ever heard. "That is nice. What does he do for a living?"

The JLo-butt lady was walking up the stairs to the boardwalk we were standing on. "He's, um, a doctor."

"A doctor! Well, aren't you lucky!"

"Sure are," I said, and looked over my shoulder. The ghost lady walked _through_ my mom and strait _into_ me. So hard that I actually stumbled a little.

"Suze!" my mom said, and grabbed my arm. The JLo lady was staring at me like I had two heads or something. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just...I just lost my balance, is all."

My mom eye-balled me for a second, then let me go.

"Why don't I show you some books?" Barbie asked, trying not to stare at the bride-to-be who stumbles for no reason, and we all followed her inside. Including the JLo girl.

Barbie pulled out these massive wedding albums when we got back inside. I looked through them for a while, the whole time feeling the JLo girl prick me in the back with her French-manicured nails.

"Um, Mom?" I said when Barbie pulled out the third album. "I've got to use the bathroom. I'll be right back."

"Okay, sweetie," she said, then went back to oohing and ahhing over the pictures.

I went down the hallway to the bathroom, JLo girl in tow, swung the door open, made sure I--we--were the only ones in there, and turned around to face her.

"Who are you?" I asked, and her eyes got big.

"I thought so," she whispered, and I sighed.

"Come on, lady, I don't have all day. I've got a wedding to plan."

"Oh, boo hoo," she said, and went to check her make-up in the mirror.

"Really," I pleaded, and she sighed and turned around.

"I'm Lea," she said. "And you must be the mediator."

"Suze," I said. "Nice to meet you, I guess." I looked her up and down. She really was pretty. Too pretty. Like a Covergirl kind of pretty. "So, how did you die?"

She looked in the mirror again. "Car wreck," she said. "My friend was drunk. We all were, really. It was my bachelorette party. Night before my wedding."

"Ouch," I said, and she shrugged. This was weird. Usually ghosts weren't so open with their death.

"I was dead on impact, they said. I rode with myself all the way to the emergency room. My fiancé was working that night--he's a doctor. He was the one who got to me first. It took two other doctors to tell him I was dead."

I imagined myself in her place for a minute, with Jesse in the fiancé's place. "How long have you been dead?" I asked her quietly.

"A year," she said.

A year. That means Jesse was working...

The bathroom door swung open and I jumped. "Susie," my mom called, and smiled when she saw me. "Barbie has another appointment. Are you okay? You look a little pale..."

She came over and felt my forehead, and I pushed her away. "Gosh, Mom. I'm fine, really."

She looked me over for a second, then said okay and walked out. I followed her, and Lea followed me.

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse wasn't home yet when my mom dropped me off, and so I sat Lea down and asked her some more questions.

Not about the night she died. I was working up to that. I started off with easy stuff--like where she grew up (here) and what she liked (swimming) and where she went to school (home schooled) and stuff like that.

Then, finally, I asked her about her fiancé.

"Where did you meet him?" I asked her.

She smiled out the kitchen window. "At the beach. His dog had gotten lose and came up to me. We walked for hours together."

"What was his name?"

I heard Jesse's key in the lock when she answered. "Ben."

"_Querida_!" Jesse called when he opened the door, and stopped when he saw me almost passed out in my chair. And Lea, too, but that kind of stuff he was use to.

"Susannah!" he said, running over to me and getting down on his knees to hug me. "Are you alright?"

"I'm, um..."

"You," Lea whispered, and Jesse looked up at her. "He looks so familiar...can you hear me too?" she asked, and Jesse nodded. "I...I've met you before, haven't I?"

Jesse looked from me to her and back to me. "Susannah?" he asked quietly.

Okay. Let me clarify a few things. Jesse's friend Ben--the one who lives next door--was engaged to Lea--the ghost sitting in front of me. Lea went out on the night before her wedding and got really wasted with some of her friends, and one of her friends rolled her car into a ditch, killing the bride in the process. Ben was working that night--as well as Jesse--at the hospital, but just a short shift. Before he left, though, they brought in Lea and he went fix her up like anyone else they get that is dead-upon-arrival. She was so messed up from the wreck, though, that he only realized it was her from the engagement ring. Jesse said he was so shook up he didn't believe it was her, and kept calling her phone. Jesse said that her phone was in her pocket, and that that was how they knew. He was the one who had to go and tell him. Jesse said he stayed with her body until the next day--their wedding day.

I remember that night so clearly, even though I tried to push it out of my head. Jesse called me when he got home and I went to his apartment. I remember it so well because it was the only time I ever saw him really cry.

"Lea," I said softly. "You're Ben's Lea. I was going to your wedding." I know that really didn't help, but I felt the need to say it.

"Yes," she said with a smile. "I'm Ben's Lea. And you're Jesse's Suze! This makes so much since now."

"It does," I whispered.

"Why are you here?" Jesse asked. He should know it was never that easy.

"Ben isn't happy. And I wanted to know if there was anything you could do to help me come back to life."

"NO," we both said, and Jesse continued, "I'm sorry, but we cannot."

Her eyes got over bright. "But I have heard all these stories..."

"They're rumors," I told her quietly. She knit her eyebrows.

"But there has to be _someway_..."

"I'm sorry, Lea, but there is no way," Jesse told her softly.

At least no way we were going to tell her.

She looked at both of us, then sighed and crossed her arms, hugging herself. "Ben is next door, isn't he?" she asked quietly, and we both nodded. "I guess I'll see you later," she whispered, and disappeared.

"Well," I said once she had gone. Jesse just sighed and hugged me again.

"Let's not let this ruin our evening, please," he whispered.

"Our evening?" I asked, and he smiled his sexy little smile.

Ooh. Our _evening_. Okay.

Jesse picked me up out of my chair and took me into the bedroom, laid me on the bed, and started kissing me.

"You smell like hospital," I told him, and he gave me a look.

"And..."

"And I think you need a shower."

"With...you, right?"

"Well," I said rolling my eyes, "if you insist."

He laughed, and I felt his laugh go through me (since he was laying on top of me, and all). "Oh, I insist," he growled in my ear, and scooped me up in his arms again.

We took a very hot shower then went and, cough cough, dried off in the bed. Twice.

"Hey," I told him breathlessly a little later. He looked over at me. "June 3rd."

"June 3rd?" He was panting a little too.

"June 3rd is our wedding day."

He smiled a little. "Oh," he said. "June 3rd. It has a nice ring to it."

I laughed, then reached across him for the phone. "Want a pizza?" I asked, already dialing the number.

"Sure," he mumbled, seeming more occupied with tickling me. I grabbed his hands when the line was picked up, and had to fight him the whole time I was ordering.

I'm telling you, Jesse had turned into quite the little sex machine.

I hung up and threw the phone on the other side of the bed. He tackled me quickly, and we landed on the opposite end of the pillows.

"We have thirty minutes," I told him, and he laughed.

"What ever will we do with the time?"

_L7L7L7L7_

We came out of the bedroom when the pizza came, Jesse in a pair of boxers that said "I Love You" all over them (Valentine's present) and me in one of his shirts.

I have to admit, I really am glad I acted like a baby about the whole sex thing. If I hadn't, Jesse would have never changed his mind. Like he said, I always get my way.

I sat on his lap and ate my pizza. Jesse took a bite out of my slice, and I took a bite out of his. He stole another bite and kissed my collarbone, and I kissed his nose.

"Alright!" he mock-yelled. "Enough."

I laughed and went back to eating.

"I am taking tomorrow off," he said, and I raised my eyebrows.

"Why?"

"I'm just taking a sick day to spend with you." He hugged me closer to him. "I missed you terribly today. You were all I thought about."

"Really? What did you think about?"

He chuckled. "I'll tell you later. What are we going to do tomorrow?"

"Well, we need to go see Father Dom. I haven't seen him in a while, and I wanted to ask him in person if he'd marry us."

Jesse nodded. "Anything else?"

"Um, we can go eat at Pebble Beach, and I can show you were we're getting married and all. And I invited Kristen over tomorrow night watch a movie. You can go hang out with Ben or something."

We both remembered Lea at the same time, and were quiet for a minute. We finished our pizza in silence.

"Would you like to know what I was thinking about?" Jesse asked with a smile, and I laughed.

_L7L7L7L7_

The next morning Jesse brought me breakfast in bed.

"To make up for leaving you yesterday," he told me.

"Aw, Jesse, you didn't leave me." He sat beside me and I fed him a strawberry.

"I know," he whispered. "I would have woken you up, but you looked so peaceful..."

"Jesse," I said, rolling my eyes. "You are so silly." I gave him a bite of egg, and he kissed me.

"So," he asked, "what are we doing today again?"

"Well, I thought we would go see Father D. first, then go and eat lunch at Pebble Beach. Maybe we could get a Christmas tree..."

"Next weekend," he said. Jesse didn't like putting decorations up early.

I ate another strawberry and pushed the tray towards him. "Okay, I need to go take a shower. You're making me fat, by the way."

Jesse watched me get up (naked) and go into the bathroom. "I beg to differ," he yelled after me.

_L7L7L7L7_

Father Dom wasn't in his office when we got there, so we sat down to wait. Well, Jesse did. I stole Father D.'s computer (which he had just got like, last year) and put a picture of me and Jesse as his background, then turned off his monitor so he didn't see it.

"You are so bad," Jesse said, and Father D. opened the door. I ran to my seat.

"So," he asked. "What brings you two here?"

"Have you seen my ring?" I asked, and showed it to him. He brought my hand closer to see.

"It is extraordinary. You did a wonderful job picking it out, Jesse."

"Thank you," Jesse said quietly. He seemed a little shy...

_Ooh_. He was feeling guilty about the whole sex thing. I rolled my eyes. Jesse is so weird.

"So," I said, leaning forwards and taking this neat little pen with a floating dolphin in it off Father Dom's desk, "we want to ask you if you'd, you know, marry us and all."

I looked up from the pen to see his reaction.

"Of course!" he said. "I would be honored."

"Awesome," I said, and Jesse said, "Thank you, Father."

"You two are very welcome. Now, I am sorry to cut this visit a little short, but I have some...behavioral issues to address."

"Aw, you must really miss have to deal with just me," I said.

"Of course, Susannah," he said, and shooed us out the door.

I took Jesse's hand when we walked into the now flooded hall, watching all the girls looking at Jesse and wanting to go "Nah-nah, he's all mine!"

I didn't of course.

Jesse opened my door and then got in on his side, put it in reverse, and pulled smoothly out of the parking spot.

"So," he said. "We are going to Pebble Beach, correct?"

"Correct," I said, turning up the radio. Jesse picked up my hand and kissed it, then held it the whole way there.

Jesse pulled into a front parking spot, and I hurried to get out of the car before he could come open my door. He smiled when I met him halfway, and we walked into the restaurant.

"Now," I told him when the hostess took us to our seat, "remember that this is a nice restaurant. So no balking at prices."

We took our seats and he opened his menu. A look of pain came over his face, then he said, "As long as we aren't paying this for our reception dinner."

I rolled my eyes. "How about we just get an appetizer, Jesse."

"Thank you," he whispered.

We ordered this yummy crab-and-cheese dip (twenty-seven dollars, which dismayed Jesse) and Cokes, and bread, of course. After our cheap little meal I took Jesse out to the beach. We sat in an oversized beach chair and watched the sunset.

"It really is beautiful here," he said. "The perfect place to get married."

"I have a question," I told him, snuggling closer. "If we were getting married in, you know, your time, where would we?"

He looked out at the ocean, his face growing darker with the disappearing sun. "Probably in our yard. Or the church. But most likely our yard."

"Where would we go for our honeymoon?"

He laughed and looked at me. "Back to our house, if I had finished building it by then."

"That's all?" I asked, and he nodded.

"That's all. But we might sneak away the next day and spend it at the beach. If you were quiet about it."

I smiled, thinking about us sneaking away, probably on his horse. I laughed and hugged him. "I'm glad we live here now, Jesse."

He kissed the top of my head. "I am as well." He looked at the time on his phone and sighed. "We should be getting back. Don't you have company coming?"

"Oh, yeah. Let me borrow your phone to call her," I said, and he handed it to me. I dialed her number, and she picked up on the second ring.

"Suze!" Kristen said. "I forgot to call and tell you I can't come over."

We were walking up the boardwalk now, and I could see the restaurant filling up with people. "Why not?" I asked.

"I, um, I don't feel so good. Cramps, you know."

"Mm-hum. You have a date, don't you?"

"Oh, God, I've got to go take a Midol. I'll call you tomorrow," she said, and hung up.

"Is she still coming over?" Jesse asked. By now we were in the car.

"No, she has "cramps", which means she has a date."

He chuckled. "And I only thought women used the cramps excuse on men."

I hit him in the shoulder. "Hey, when I say I have cramps, I have cramps. Don't make me go all hormonal on you."

He laughed and stole a kiss at the stop light.

I made Jesse watch all the movies I had pulled out for me and Kristen; _How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days_, (which Jesse found slightly amusing, especially the shower scene at the end with Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey, which I enjoyed as well), _The Wedding Planner_ (which gave me some wedding tips), and _The Notebook_ (which, to my amusement, made Jesse cry).

After that I stayed up to watch TV and Jesse fell asleep next to me.

I think I had dosed off as well when a loud crash woke us up. I jumped off the couch and waited for my vertigo to clear before I saw what had happened.

A picture of Kristen and me at my birthday before last was laying smashed in the floor. I watched, a little dazed, as our faces slowly ripped into tiny pieces.

The Lea came out of no where, her angry, shaking hands destroying the picture.

"Hey!" I yelled. "What gives?"

"Is this your friend?" she hissed, and the lights and TV flickered.

"Um, yeah. Why?"

"Because, she is over _there_--" she pointed towards next door "--with _my_ husband!"

"She is?" Jesse asked, and I remembered that he was in the room. He had the same shocked look on his face that I had.

"Oh, you bet. And would you like to know what there doing?"

"Um, no thanks," I said. "Besides, it's not like you two are married or anything. You are dead, you know."

"Don't remind me," she hissed, and disappeared. I sighed, looking at the picture, and went to get the vacuum.

"So," Jesse said when I came back. He had gotten the trash can and was putting the little pieces of glass in it. "Let me get this strait. Kristen cancels her night with you so she can go on a date with Ben, right?"

"Right," I groaned, get on my knees to help him.

"And you had no idea she was seeing him?"

"You think I wouldn't tell you?" I was a little offended by this.

"Well, no. You might not. Not that that wrong, since she is your friend."

"No," I sighed. "I knew nothing about it."

Jesse went to put the can back up, then went to turn on the sink, but no water came out.

I turned off the vacuum. "What are you doing?" I asked.

"Well, I cut my finger, and I was trying to wash it off...Did you forget to pay the water bill?" he joked.

"No," I said, and a second later we heard a loud explosion from next door.

"Well," Jesse said, and I ran over to the window to look next door with him. Water was rising up from under Ben's house and flooding his yard. "_His_ water works."


	7. Chapter 7

_This could be the most reviewed, stressed over, disgusting, boring chapter ever. Which is EXACTLY why i deleted all of it and wrote it again! so now it is MUCH better! this chapter contains a--maybe two--"adult scene"(s) if u read it and are not in high school or older, u might regret it. their maybe some mistakes in this chapter. i really didnt feel like editing lol _

"I think it was just the septic tank," Ben said when we came over into his yard. Kristen sent me a nervous smile from behind his back.

"I don't think it's septic," Jesse said. "I looks more like water."

"Smells more like water, too," I pointed out.

"It might have just been a pipe," Jesse said. Him and Ben went into guy mode about pipes, and I grabbed Kristen and pulled her to the side.

"You should have told me!" I said.

She looked fondly over at Ben. "I know. I just didn't know what you would say."

"How long have you two been going out?"

"This is only our second date," she said, then leaned in closer to whisper, "And we almost went all the way!"

I saw Lea standing behind her, and with the down turn of her lips water started bubbling up under Kristen. She screeched and jumped back on the sidewalk.

I came over to Jesse and Ben. "We should probably go," I said, pulling on Jesse's sleeve. "I have that casserole in the oven."

Jesse looked at me. "What casser--oh, right. That casserole. I forgot all about it."

We said goodnight to them, and walked back home.

"Well," I said. "That was awkward."

_L7L7L7L7_

The next afternoon I met Kristen for lunch. Well, me and Lea, I should say.

"He is just so sweet," Kristen gushed about Ben. Lea glared at her so hard my Coke started to shake in it's glass.

"Well, you know he's been through a lot. With Lea and all."

"Lea?"

My Coke started to work itself off the table, and I grabbed it quickly. "Yeah, he didn't tell you about Lea..."

"Oh, oh, oh," she said, and took a sip of her drink. "Lea. Yeah. Well, it's been a whole year. He seems fine."

"Well," I said, grabbing the moving salt shaker. "He might seem fine on the outside . . . I'm just saying take it slow. Don't rush into things."

"DON'T RUSH INTO THINGS!!" Lea shrieked. "How about don't rush into _any_thing!"

I shoot a look at Lea.

"Oh, we're not. But I was wondering, we were thinking about taking a trip to L.A. Maybe you and Jesse would want to come. Kind of a New Year's trip."

"Sure. When are you two going?"

"HEY! You're supposed to be on my side!" Lea yelled at me.

"We were thinking about leaving the first, to miss the crowd. We'd come back around the fourth or so."

"Yeah. Just let me talk to Jesse about it."

"WHAT!!" Lea yelled, and Kristen's martini fell over in her lap.

"Ugh!" she yelled, jumping up. Several bus boys ran to our table with towels while Kristen tried to salvage her white t-shirt.

Or, at least, that's what everyone else saw. Only I saw Lea standing in front of her, angry hands holding my friend's shoulders, trying to shake her.

"YOU BITCH!" she shrieked. "YOU DRITY, UGLY BITCH! YOU ARE GOING TO DIE, YOU HEAR ME! D-I-E!"

"Hey," I said and Lea looked at me with eyes like fire.

"_I_," she whispered, voice shaking, "will talk to _you_ later."

And she disappeared, leaving me to help clean up spilled martini.

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse was working in the yard when I got home. He put a dirty arm around my shoulder and kissed my cheek. "You don't look too good," he said quietly.

"I have a headache," I mumbled.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, and made sure the neighbors weren't out before he gave me a kiss. Most of our neighbors were old.

"Please tell me why you are doing yard work in December," I said, once my head cleared from his kiss.

"Because, Susannah, you have to start planting the bulbs of most flowers early. And this is also a good time to fertilize."

"Is _that_ what that smell is?" I asked, and he kissed my forehead.

"Very funny, _querida_. Why don't you go take a nap?"

"I think I will," I said, and gave his butt a playful slap before I went inside.

I stripped off my jeans for sweatpants and laid down on the couch, watching Jesse working through the window. He was so hot. I have no idea why I got so lucky. I mean, what did I ever do to deserve someone as great as Jesse?

"Don't just lay there."

Oh yeah. That.

"You know I'm here to talk to you." Lea got out of our armchair and came to pace in front of me.

"Please," I whispered, pulling the throw blanket over my head. "I just want a nap."

"Oh, God. I'm _so_ sorry, do you have a headache? Here, _let me make it worse_." She glared at me, and the disposal started grinding in he kitchen.

"Ugh!" I yelled, throwing the blanket off. "God, okay? I'm listening."

"Good," she said, sitting on the arm of the armchair. "So let's start with this little trip. It's a retarded idea, okay? Don't go."

"Hey," I said. "Don't tell me what to do. I'll go on whatever trip I want to."

She narrowed her eyes. "You do, and you, Jesse, and that little tramp will be _very_ sorry."

"Don't call my friend a tramp!"

"Well, she is. What else should I call her?"

"Hey!" I yelled. "You wanted to talk!"

She sighed, looking out the window. "You're right. My God, Jesse has a great ass. What does he do for that? Strength train?"

"Okay," I said, getting up and coming to stand in front of Lea. "Either you tell me what you wanted, or I'm out of here."

"Fine fine fine," she said, holding up her hands. "All I wanted to say was not to egg this little relationship on. It's just a phase of grieving, obviously."

And she disappeared. Again.

"What's a form of grieving?" I yelled out. "Wanting a girlfriend? A little company? Maybe, oh I don't know, a successful relationship with someone _alive_?"

The disposal grounded again, and I groaned and laid back on the couch.

"What was that?" Jesse asked. He had come in as I had laid down.

"Never mind," I sighed, and grabbed the remote off the in table. Jesse eyed me wirily on his way to the shower.

I think I fell asleep, because the next thing I knew Jesse was moving my feet off the end of the couch and putting them in his lap. Then he started rubbing them.

Talk about heaven.

Noticing I was awake, Jesse smiled at me and asked, "Are you hungry?"

"Not really," I crocked. "I know _you_ are." Jesse was always hungry. Unlike me, he didn't have to worry about the size of his hips or if his stomach was pooching over his jeans. He had zero fat on his body. Not even his butt, as nice and round as it is, had any fat on it. It was all tone muscle.

Which I don't have a problem with. But still.

"Maybe we can go somewhere later," he suggested. "Maybe Chinese."

"Maybe," I said, covering my face with my arm.

He was quiet for a while longer, his big, strong hands still rubbing my feet. Then he said, "Do you realize I will be twenty-eight this year?"

"Actually, you will be more like one hundred and seventy-eight. Ish."

"Susannah," he continued like I had never said anything. "Twenty-eight is two years away form thirty."

"And?"

"And I don't won't to be thirty."

I looked at him. "Jesse. You have been alive for almost TWO HUNDRED years. What is thirty to you?"

"Susannah, I was _dead_ for most of those years. Now I am actually aging."

I rolled my eyes. "You are just trying to annoy me," I said. Because honestly he was. He has never cared how old he was. Never! Why now?

"I am not," he mumbled. Then, "Can we go eat please? I am so hungry."

I groaned and got up, going to put my jeans back on. "Sometimes I think I am marrying a seven year old. _Not_ a one hundred seventy-seven year old," I told him. He stuck his tongue out at me. See? My point is proven.

I put on my favorite jeans (the ones with the holes that drove Jesse crazy) and a clean white shirt and fluffed up my hair. I definitely was rocking the whole sex kitten look, it you ask me. Which might have been why when Jesse walked into the bathroom, (to pee, I guess) he came up behind me and nibbled--nibbled! Like with his teeth!--on my neck, then my ear. Then he whispered, "I'm sorry for annoying you," in my ear, and went to go pee. (The toilet is separated from the rest of the bathroom. It's in it's own little room.)

So yeah. DEFINITELY rocking the sex kitten look.

When we got in the car I pulled down the mirror and put on some lipgloss. I noticed Jesse looking out of the corner of his eye, but he didn't say anything.

Though I'm pretty sure he didn't keep fidgeting in his seat for any reason. If you know what I mean.

We went to Friday's for dinner. (I wasn't in the mood for Chinese.) Jesse got this huge cheeseburger with bacon and ketchup and onions and mustard and pickles...I opted for a salad.

"Why are you eating that, _querida_?" Jesse asked, after our waitress left.

"Because I have a dress to fit in," I told him, then added, "When I find it."

"Susannah," he half-purred in his full accent. Now _I_ was the one fidgeting in _my_ seat. "You are too thin. You need to eat!" He pushed his burger towards me, and I pushed it back.

"I am _not_ too thin."

"Yes you are," he argued.

"No I'm not," I sung back.

Jesse sighed. "Just as long as you don't _lose_ any weight."

I just rolled my eyes. My salad was good! Maybe not as good as a cheeseburger . . .

"So what are you doing tomorrow?" I asked, spearing a rather large piece of lettuce. I saw another waitress come buy with a big tray of deserts...Maybe we could split one...

"Working. It is a Friday."

"And it's also Christmas Eve," I pointed out. He only shrugged.

"I get paid extra. I'm working New Year's Eve day, as well."

"But you're off Christmas, right?" He nodded. "Good," I said.

He took another bite of his cheeseburger, and this time all the pickles and lettuce fell out in a big, ketchupy mess. "What are you doing tomorrow?" he asked, putting his burger down and eating what had fallen out with his fork.

Okay. This salad was nasty. I reached over for a fry. "I was going to look for a dress for that party. They are having huge sales at the Chanel outlet."

"Oh," he said. He wasn't that trilled about going himself. To the party, I mean.

"I'll get you something to wear, too," I added. It didn't help.

"What if I have to work that night?"

"Jesse," I started, taking a breath. We had had this conversation before. "You are _not_ going to work that night. End of story."

He made a face similar to a (you guessed it) seven years olds. "Susannah, I don't want to go to that party."

"Listen, I promise Paul won't do anything. He seems really...sincere. About the whole hands-off thing. I promise."

Jesse scowled at his burger, then mumbled something in Spanish. Finally he said, "If you think so."

"I know so," I told him. He gave me a half smile, then asked the waitress (who was walking by) for our check.

"But I wanted desert," I complained.

Jesse just smiled. "I'll give you something better at home."

_L7L7L7L7L7_

Jesse started kissing me before he had the door unlocked. As soon as it had swung open we both crashed through it. I don't even know if we locked it back.

He picked me up, letting me wrap my legs around his hard torso, and carried me into the bedroom, taking off my shirt at the same time. He sat me on the bed, which put me on eye (or lip) level with him. (We have a high bed.)

"_Susannah_," he whispered in my ear when I took off his shirt and ran my hands over his hard chest. Then he started whispering things in Spanish.

God, I wish I knew what he was saying!

He pushed me back and stripped the rest of my clothes off, then crawled on top of me. But I pushed him over and whispered, "You never let me be on top," in his ear.

Which was true. He was a control freak.

But he dealed. Especially when I started biting his neck. That's when he went crazy with the Spanish mumbling and the grabbing of my butt and the stroking of...other places.

"_Querida_," he whispered. I understood that one.

I fought to get his boxer-briefs off without my teeth leaving his neck. Then I pushed myself against his hardness.

"_Jesse_," I breathed back. Now he was making me lose it. He struggled to push me back over, but I whispered a harsh, "_No_," and pushed him into me.

The feeling was a relief...for a second. I started to grid my pelvis into his, and he let out a sexy little moan.

I found his lips and started kissing him again, then turned my head so he could kiss my cheek and neck while I rubbed my face on his five o'clock shadow...

...When I noticed the alarm clock on his in table moving. Not _moving _. . . more like . . . _shaking_. I raised my head and saw the lamp shaking as well.

"JESSE!" I yelled, cutting off his kissing. He looked up at me, his black eyes surprised. "EARTHQUAKE!"

He sat up, pulling away from me, and noticed everything moving too. Then the bed started shaking, and I screamed. He pushed me down and laid on top of me, pushing my face into his sweaty chest. I covered the back of his head with my hands.

It was over in a second. No big crash. No harder shaking. It just ended.

Then our power went off.

"Great," I said, still panting, as Jesse sat up.

"It could be worse," he told me. He was panting too. And he still had a boner, I saw. Awesome.

But my cell phone rang before I could jump him again, and I sighed and answered it.

"SUSIE!" my mom yelled. I held the phone away from my ear. "Are you okay? Is Jesse okay?"

"We're fine, Mom," I said. Great. I was still panting.

"Are you sure? Did anything break?"

"The power just went out, is all. Are you okay?"

She seemed to calm down a little. "We're fine. Our power is still on."

A strange beep started going off. At first I thought it might have been the alarm for a gas leak, but I realized it was only Jesse's pager.

"What is that?" my mom asked.

"It's, um, Jesse's pager. I think he has to go to the hospital."

"Oh. Okay. Call me tomorrow, Suze."

"I will. Bye, Mom." I hung up and looked at Jesse, who was looking at me.

"I have to go," he said, and got out of bed and headed towards the closet.

"When will you be back?" I asked.

"I don't know," he called through the length of the bathroom. He was back a moment later dressed in scrubs. I couldn't tell if he was still . . . standing at attention or not. Stupid earthquake.

He handed me a flashlight he had found. "It will probably be morning, Susannah."

"So you're just going to leave me?" I asked in a high-pitched voice. "What if the big one comes?"

He chuckled and kissed the top of my head. "The big one isn't going to come, _querida_. Call me if you need me, alright?"

"Okay," I whispered. He held the back of my head and kissed my lips softly. "I love you," I whispered.

"I promise to finished making love to you when I get back," he whispered hotly (more like heavenly) in my ear, then left.

Leaving me with the flashlight and the cat.

Great.

I didn't fall asleep until about four, and I only know that because I kept checking my cell phone. When I woke up again the sun was out and our power was back on . . . and Jesse was taking off his bloody scrubs and crashing into bed next to me.

"How was it?" I asked, rolling over to stroke his face. His five o'clock shadow was darker and harder against my palm than earlier.

"Not too bad," me mumbled. He had already closed his eyes.

"Were there a lot of people?"

"Yes. But nothing too serious. The worst was a broken leg, I think."

I laid my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Even after all these years, the sound of it still amazed me. "Are you going back?" I whispered.

He didn't say anything at first, and I thought he was asleep, but then he cleared his throat and said, "I'm working tonight."

"Tonight!" I turned to look at him. He had his sad eyes open and was using their full . . . sadness on me.

"I'm sorry, Susannah. But since I couldn't work today I'm going to have to work tonight."

"But it's Christmas Eve," whispered, trying to make my eyes sad too. It didn't work.

Jesse let out a huff. "I'm sorry, _querida_. I can't help it." He took my pillow and put it over his face. "Now let me sleep," he said, his voice muffled.

I turned the TV on with the remote. My mom's station came on. There was a reporter at one of the "hardest hit areas", showing everyone the damage . . . which wasn't much. A tree limb in the front yard and a toppled chimney.

"Turn it down," Jesse complained, and I sighed and hit the mute button.

The ticker at the bottom said that specialists suspected another--larger--earthquake, with the possibility of a few smaller ones before it hit.

The screen flipped to my mom, who started talking, but of course I couldn't hear her. Jesse had started snoring (which annoys the crap out of me. The doctor told him it was his tonsils, but he refused to have them out), so I turned the sound back on. He was a hard sleeper.

"It has been confirmed that the epicenter of the earthquake was somewhere near the Wood Hills neighborhood, about six-point-three miles from Caramel Beach. Once again, we are told that this is just the beginning, and that a larger one is coming. Here are some tips on earthquake safety."

I turned the TV off. Jesse was snoring louder now, his left arm over his head (still covered by the pillow). I gently pulled on the soft tuffs of hair under his arm.

"Susannah," he mumbled, and turned on his side. "I thought you were going shopping."

"I am," I said.

"Well, please go."

I waited for him to fall asleep again, then whispered, "Can I take your card?" in his ear.

"Whatever," he mumbled back. I jumped out of bed and ran to the shower.

_L7L7L7L7_

There is nothing like the threat of an earthquake to scare off shoppers. Well, normal shoppers. Not a veteran like me.

The Chanel outlet was deserted, and I snagged three dresses, one pair of sunglasses, and a button-up shirt for Jesse for 345.34. Pretty good, if you ask me.

Next was the Juicy outlet, which was newly opened, where I found a great pair of sweats and a t-shirt for 150.87. Not to shabby, either.

The crowds started coming in about three, so I made a final stop at American Eagle and found a cute green sweater (which would go great with the red polo shirt I found Jesse) for tomorrow, then started back home.

I didn't get home until five-thirty, and Jesse had already left for work. After hanging up all my clothes I grabbed the phone book and ordered a pizza (supreme, with everything except anchovies, and with extra cheese). Then I crashed on the couch and watched all the episodes of _America's Next Top Model_ I had DVR'd.

I should have known who it was when a flash of light caught the corner of my eye, but I turned and looked anyways.

"I love this show!" Lea said. She was sitting in our armchair again.

"Wonderful," I muttered. Shouldn't she be haunting her former love or something? It _was_ Christmas Eve.

"What cycle is this? The last one I saw was nine."

"It's ten, I think." I wondered if Kristen was with Ben. Was that why Lea was here?

I looked over at the ghost in my armchair. Her red cocktail dress looked perfect...no wrinkles, no blood stains. Her thick black hair was pulled back into a curly ponytail, and her blue eyes were make-up perfectly with black eyeliner and mascara.

"Where's Jesse?" she asked. It was like we were friends or something, and Lea had just popped in to watch _ANTM_ with me.

"He's working. He got stuck on the night shift." I really didn't feel like going into all that with Lea. "Where's Ben?"

Lea looked at her black Jessica Simpson pumps. "He's working too. We always used to spend Christmas Eve together."

"Is he upset?"

She took her shoes off her feet and picked at her French pedicure. "He was crying earlier. He keeps my favorite t-shirt in his drawer, and he was holding it and stuff. I think he's upset." She looked at me. "There is no way you can bring me back? No way at all?"

I shook my head. "Nope. I'm sorry."

Her eyes, which had been burning into my own when she asked the question, fell back down to her feet. "I love him so much. Will you tell him that?" She looked at me again. "Will you tell him I'm here, and that I am trying to find a way to come back? Can you?"

"I...we kind of like to keep it a secret, Lea. I mean, I don't know if Ben would start telling people or not."

"He wouldn't!" she said, kind of shocked. "He would believe you! I swear!"

"Lea..." She was really getting on my nerves. Seriously. Why couldn't she just MOVE ON? "I'll think about it, okay?"

Her pretty face twisted and she said, "Fine!" kind of hotly, then she disappeared.

Really, what had Ben seen in her? I mean, other than being flat-out gorgeous, she had an awful personality. It was like Me Me Me, Now Now Now. God.

The doorbell rang (which made Spike, who had been sitting on the kitchen counter, jump and land hard on the floor, then run into our bedroom. Stupid spaz cat) and I got up and pulled out the twenty I had stuffed in my pocket.

"Hi," I said to the pizza guy, and handed him the twenty. He handed me my pizza. "Keep the change."

"Sweet," he said. He had a pair of iPod headphone coming from the collar of his shirt, and one of the speakers in his right ear. I could hear emoish music coming from the free one.

The pizza guy headed back to his car, and I shut the door, only to see a new guest had arrived and was sitting at the kitchen table.

I swear, it was like the ghosts of Christmas Past were coming to visit, or something.

"Merry Christmas," Josefina said when I sat the pizza down on the table. "Is Jesse here?"

"No," I said, getting a Diet Coke out of the fridge. "He had to work."

"Oh," she said. I opened the pizza box and her eyes got big. "What is that?"

I took out the biggest slice and sunk my teeth into it...wonderful. "A pizza," I told her, still chewing. I swallowed and took a swig of Coke. "It's like bread, with tomato sauce, and cheese and vegetables and stuff on top."

"Is it good?" she asked. Her nose was wrinkled.

"It's delicious." I took another bite.

She watched me for a second, then looked around the house. "Everything looks wonderful," she said. "You have been working hard, I see."

I nodded, too busy with chewing to respond.

"I worked hard on my house, too," she said with a smile.

"Your house?" I asked. I hoped she would forgive me for talking with my mouth full.

"Oh, yes. My beautiful house. My husband John built it. It was wonderful." She turned to look at me, her brown gaze--the same as Jesse's--boring into me. "John was a carpenter, you see, and he wanted to live on the shore so he could collect the drift wood. At first I told him no, that all I knew was farming. But he finally convinced me. And I am very glad he did."

I kept forgetting Josefina had lived to be older than she appeared now. So she was married? And she left home?

"Tell me about John," I said.

Josefina smiled (probably the same smile I get when someone asks about Jesse). "Well, I met him when I was sixteen. It was the year after Jesse died, to the day. The first day I didn't have to wear black, too." Her smile broadened. "I was supposed to go into town with Marta about a mule, but silly Marta had already promised the Martin's oldest son she would go horseback riding with him. So I had to go all by myself on my mare and drag that stubborn mule all the way home.

"About halfway the mule stopped following me. I tried everything: pushing her, whipping her, scaring her, even. But nothing worked.

"Well, about that time John rode up. I had met him before, at parties and things. I had always had a bit of an eye for him. He reminded me of Jesse, I think. Which is what all my sisters and I wanted--another Jesse. Well, John helped my with the mule--I don't remember what he did--and rode with me all the way home. Marta was very upset with me, since my mother saw me riding up with John, and I was supposed to be hiding the fact she had gone off with the Martin boy. After that day, though, John kept coming back to visit, and not two months later he asked my father for my hand. We were married the next week."

She smiled at me. "Different from today, isn't it?"

"You got married the week after you were engaged?" The thought was awe-striking for me. It was going to take six months to plan out our wedding!

"We most certainly did. John was very excited; he said he couldn't wait a second longer to marry me."

"Did you have any kids? I mean, children?"

She smiled again. "We had five; all girls. Well, there was a sixth, but he didn't make it to long. Only three days. I felt so bad for John, too. He wanted a son so very badly."

Spike, who had woken up from one of his twelve daily naps, was eyeing Josefina from the kitchen counter. Then he eyed my pizza.

"But," Josefina continued, drawing my attention away from Spike, "I told him no more after that. We had three grandsons, though. I think that was enough."

Spike had jumped onto the table, and had started eating the mushrooms off my pizza. I picked him up (holding him away from my face--he could get creative with those claws) and took him to the front door, pushed him out, and locked it behind me.

"What were your kids names?" I asked, putting the rest of the pizza in the fridge and washing off my plate.

"Our children? Let's see...my oldest was Margaret, then Marta, Lucille, Mercedes, and little Elizabeth. And the boy we named John, but the three days he was alive I always called him Jesse. I thought he looked just like him."

"I hope we have a boy," I said before I realized I had.

Josefina lit up. "I hope you do, too! Would you name him Jesse?"

"I, um, I don't know. It might be too confusing." If we had a boy. Which we probably wouldn't, since Jesse's family ran so strong in girls.

But did that really matter? I mean, we had learned in Advanced Reproductive Studies (I had to take it, okay? It was either that or a class about the brain...were we had to DISSECT an actual BRAIN...no thanks) that the chance of the sperm being a Y or a Z was 50/50. Always. So why had all of Jesse's siblings turned out to be girls? Good question.

Standing here thinking about Jesse's sperm really made me miss him. So what if he was getting, like, super overtime for working tonight? Shouldn't I be more important than money?

Of course, he was working to support me, and to put the down payment on our honeymoon. So I guess that kind of changed things.

"It might be," Josefina said about the confusing comment. Then she sighed. "It's late. You are probably tired." She stood up and started disappearing. "Tell Jesse Merry Christmas for me!"

"I will," I said, and she was gone.

Oh well.

With nothing else to do, I decided to surprise Jesse. Why not? I still had another hour until he can home, and he needed to regret leaving me here.

I found the phone and called his cell.

"Are you on break?" I asked when he picked up, even though I knew he was.

"Yes. Why?"

"Because, I was just thinking about you. And how much I wish you were here. With me. In this big, warm bed."

"Susannah..."

"And I wanted you to know that when you get home I have a surprise for you. A Christmas surprise."

"Susannah..."

"You're going to like it."

"What is it?" he asked. He seemed a little amused.

"Let's just say I didn't spend any money on what I'm going to do to you--I mean, what I'm going to give you."

"Susannah..." he said, this time in a different tone. Like he regretted going to work instead of staying home with me.

Perfect.

"Bye bye, Jesse. Hurry home."

I hung up before he could say another word.

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse walked through the door at eleven sharp. I had turned off all the lights except the two lamps in the living room, leaving him just enough light to see the big red ribbon I had tied around my chest, and the lacy red panties I had dug out of the closet.

"_Nombre de Dios_," he whispered, and stumbled over to me.

"Do you like your present?" I asked in a flirty way.

He mumbled something in Spanish. I think it meant _Yes_, and possibly, _You are the sexiest thing I have ever seen in my life. Please take me now_. He pushed his face into my neck and took a deep whiff of the Juicy Couture perfume I had put on earlier...he said it was his favorite, because it smelled like gardenias, and his mother had always grown them.

I don't know if he was thinking about his mother at this particular moment...Probably not, by the way he was running his warm fingers up and down my spine.

"Would you like to open your present?" I whispered in his ear. He nodded, and his hard stubble--he had shaved earlier, but it was back again--rubbed against my cheek.

I took his hand and led him into our room, where I peeled off his scrubs and started kissing him. He reached for the back of my bow several times, but I fought his hands off. He kissed me more affectionately on the neck, his teeth nipping my neck, and I finally gave in and let him take the bow off. He was just that good, damn it!

"Do you like them?" I asked when the bow fell to the floor. I had pulled away from his face just enough so his lips weren't touching mine anymore. His hot breath fanned my face and his liquid onyx eyes were only inches from mine.

"I _love_ them," he whispered hotly, and cupped both my breasts as he kissed me again.

Wow. Wasn't expecting _that_ reaction out of Jesse.

He pushed me back onto the bed, which was fine, since my knees were turning into mush anyways.

After he was completely laying on top of me, he went for my little red panties with the bows on them. I don't remember him taking them off, really. In fact, I don't really remember any of it after that point.

Okay. So I remember all of it. So sue me. He was _fantastic_.

_L7L7L7L7_

The next morning Jesse woke me up with a big, wet kiss on the cheek.

Now, I like kisses. I even like wet kisses. But I do NOT like wet kisses at six in the morning. Which was about the time he decided to lay one on me.

"_Jesse_," I groaned, and turned away from him. I felt his whiskered face rubbing my shoulder and neck, then his wet lips found my cheek again.

I tried to elbow him in the gut, but he knew me too well. As soon as he felt my arm go back he had moved out of the way, even though he continued to kiss me.

"Jesse. _Please_," I groaned again. He kissed my ear.

"Would you like me to go make breakfast?" he whispered. I nodded, my eyes still closed. He gave me another kiss and got out of bed.

I fell back to sleep until the wonderful smell of eggs with cheese and bacon and rolls filled my nose. I suddenly remembered how long it had been since I had dinner, and my stomach growled. I rolled out of bed and put on a shirt and some pajama pants, then followed my nose into the kitchen.

Jesse had turned our Christmas tree on (it was a little four foot one. We had decided to wait until next year to get a big one) and had set the table. He smiled at me when I drifted into the kitchen and sat at the table.

"It smells WONDERFUL," I said, and took the plate (which he had loaded with eggs, bacon, and a roll).

"I hope so," he said, and sat down with his own plate. I took a bite of my eggs.

Now Jesse is no Andy when it comes to cooking, but he is pretty decent. Better than me, even. Which isn't saying much.

"Did you see your present?" he asked, nodding towards the tree. A little red box with a big white bow sat under it.

"Oh! Hold that thought!" I said, and ran to the closet to grab his two presents, then put them under the tree. "Sorry," I said, taking my seat again. "Santa was a little late to our house."

"That's fine," Jesse said with a smile.

I took a bite of my bacon . . . heaven. "So," I said, still chewing, "have you seen your sister today?"

"Yes," he said with a smile. "She just left, actually." He took a bite of his own bacon, then asked mid-chew, "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, she just kind of hung out with me last night. It was cool. We talked about her life, and stuff."

Jesse stared at his plate for a minute, then asked, "When would you like to open your presents, _querida_?"

I looked up from my own plate. "Jesse . . . you know you can't get away with changing the subject like that. Especially with _me_."

He smiled at me, his breath-taking, mind numbing smile . . . you know, the one that makes me go all squishy. "Are you finished with your breakfast?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes and let it go. "Yeah, I'm done."

He took my plate and came back to take my hand and lead me to our little (Charlie Brown) Christmas tree. "Now," he said, picking up my present. "I didn't spend any money on you for this. I already owned it."

I gave him a look. No money? I was hoping for a tennis bracelet.

He smiled. "You'll like it," he whispered, and put the box into my awaiting hands.

I ripped off the paper and pull off the box top...

"JESSE!" I yelled. He smiled again.

"Do you like it?" Jesse asked, and slipped the huge opal ring onto my finger. "It was my mother's."

"JESSE!"

"Did I get the size right? Your engagement ring was a seven so . . ."

"Jesse!"

"What?"

"Where did you find it?"

He smiled. "You like it?"

"I love it! Where did you find it?"

"It's complicated," he said, and I groaned, then hugged him.

"I love you," I whispered, and hugged him closer.

"I love you more," he whispered into my hair.

"No. You don't." I bent down and scooped up his own present. "I feel kind of cheep about what I got you," I said when he started to unwrap it.

"You shouldn't," he said, like it was a ridiculous idea that should have never crossed my mind. I watched him open the box with his wonderfully big hands and pull out the black leather medical bag. Then he laughed, and asked, "Why would you feel bad about this? I love it!"

"Well," I said when he reached over to pull me next to him, "I was getting kind of tried of the Fix-Susannah-Box. Besides, every real doctor is ready for an emergency, right?"

"Of course," he said, kissing my forehead. "And I love it. It's wonderful."

"Not as wonderful as a ring," I pointed out.

"But," he countered, "your present has character."

"Touche."

To conserve water Jesse and I took a shower together that morning. And let me tell you, there is nothing (NOTHING) in this world like being naked together with hot water and soap running all over you. It was wonderful. Really.

But because of the shower (and, yes, the love making that followed) we were late to Andy's Big Fantastic Family Christmas Lunch, making my mom kind of mad at me.

And it was kind of embarrassing, walking in to my huge extended family (two step-aunts, five step-cousins, and two step-cousins in law, plus the married cousins children) and having my mom say, "Finally, Susie! We've been waiting in hour to eat!", while everyone else gives us that Mm-hum...We-Know-What-You-Two-Were-Doing look.

I just shrugged and rattled something off about traffic.

As the family progressed to the dining room my mom came up beside me - to nag me about being late, no doubt - and noticed the ring on my finger.

I mean my new ring. Not the engagement ring. She had seen that.

"What is that?!" she asked, pulling my hand up to her face to see it.

"My Christmas present from Jesse. Do you like it?"

My mom turned to - nicely - nag Jesse this time. "Jesse!" she said. "You're spoiling Suze!"

He just smiled his wonderful smile and said, "Well, everyone else is paying for our wedding. I might as well."

"Actually," I said, "It was his mother's ring."

My mom (who is under the impression that Jesse was orphaned at an early age) just smiled wider and told me I was a "very lucky girl".

Yeah. Like I don't know this.

There were so many people that Andy had to add a card table and the kitchen table to the dining room table - making one strange table. Jesse and I sat towards the end, where my brothers and mom and Andy where. Well, all my brothers except Jake. He was apparently to good to spend Christmas with his real family and was with Summer at her parent's LA mansion (her parents were kind of loaded).

"So . . . " I asked my mom wen we started eating. "Is Jake too good to eat dinner with us at Christmas?"

"Suze," my mom said, rolling her eyes. Then she brightened and said, "You haven't heard the good news?"

"_What_ good news?"

"There's going to be two weddings this year! Jake and Summer are getting married too!"

_L7L7L7L7L7_

I took me a while to get over that one. After dinner I promptly excused myself to my room, where I threw some stuff against the wall and kicked the boxes of my things that now covered the floor.

Jesse came in after I had ended my little rampage and sat with me on the bed. He picked up the bridal magazine I had ripped in half and flipped threw the pages.

But I knew what he was doing. He was seeing how mad I was.

But by now I had calmed down enough so all that was running through my mind was _Jake . . . ruining my wedding . . . Summer . . . a prettier, richer bride . . . stealing my wedding spotlight . . . _

Finally Jesse sighed and set the magazine aside, then handed me an envelope.

"It came in the mail this morning and I forgot to give it to you. I think it's from your grandmother."

It was. I opened the flat and pulled out a pamphlet with a yellow Post-It note on it. The Post-It said _Call Me_. I opened the pamphlet and pulled out the two airplane tickets.

Two tickets departing April seventh at six AM. Non-stop to LaGuardia International Airport, NYC.

I looked at Jesse, who was smiling.

"You knew about this?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Your grandmother wants to meet me. And she thinks Gina and you can find your dress . . . "

"My dress!" I lurched forwarded and hugged him. "I love you Jesse," I whispered. Because now it didn't matter if Summer was stealing my wedding spotlight - I was going to have couture wedding dress from the fashion capital of the world.

Boo bitch. Boo.

"You have one more present - from your parents. They said you could come and see it whenever you would like."

I went and checked my make up in the mirror, then followed Jesse downstairs.

Andy was standing at the front door - my mom was missing, as well as the rest of the family.

"What?" I asked, coming to stand beside him at the door. Jesse was right behind me.

"Merry Christmas, Suze," Andy said, and opened the door wide.

And sitting in the driveway was a gold Lexus with a big red bow. Oh, and my entire family.

_L7L7L7L7L7_

i know i know i haven't updated in like a bagillion years. whatever. here are some great songs i just love to make you happy again!!

Flashing Lights by Kanye West (I love kanye west so much. he is a great artist. i also like good life and homecoming off his graduation cd as well)

Rockferry and Warwick Avenue by Duffy. (great great great. wonderful)

Shut Up and Let Me Go by The Ting Tings. (yep the one from the iPod commercial. this is a great myspace song)

Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls. (classic. possibly Suze/Jesse wedding song?? maybe)

Thunder by Boys Like Girls (this is the song of my summer)

Thats what you get by paramore (i looove this song)

Hero/Heroine by boys like girls (THIS SONG ROOOCKS)


	8. Chapter 8

"Good morning," I whispered to Jesse. He opened one eye and looked at me. Then at his clock. Then at me.

"It's six in the morning," he whispered. "The alarm hasn't even gone off yet."

"I know," I whispered back. And he had every reason to be astound. I mean, I'm no morning person.

But I had magically woken up about ten minutes ago with an amazingly happy outlook on my upcoming week (new Lexus, big party, and LA in the morning) and now I was . . .

. . . well, a little horny.

And Jesse obviously picked up on this, being a guy and all, because as soon as he opened both eyes and pushed his wonderfully soft-looking hair out of his eyes, he started to rub my back and butt.

"Why are you awake then?" he asked. His accent was thick - it always was when he woke up. He told me it was because he usually dreamed in Spanish. (Which is just too sexy to even put in words.)

"Because," I said, taking the hand that was resting above his head on his pillow and pulling it under the covers. He smiled when I put it where I wanted it. "I'm just so _horny_."

_L7L7L7L7L7 _

I was a little afraid to park my new Lexus in Jake's parking lot, which was full of '63 VW's and a big van that had _The Shag Wagon_ painted on it.

But I finally found a space that was secluded and pulled my baby (yeah, my baby. Jesse has his baby - the cat. So I need a baby too) into it. I hit the lock button twice after I got out - the noise it made was a little orgasmic.

Jake was in the back of his shop - which used to be some kind of restaurant on the beach, feeding all the hungry surfers. Until they had an outbreak of e-coli and had to shut it down.

Now it was the Carmel Surf Shop, with Jake and Summer's apartment on the floor above it.

"What do you want?" my stepbrother asked when I walked up to the counter he was leaning down on. He was apparently having trouble with the electronic cash register, since he had a phone in one hand (on hold) and a calculator under the other.

"Summer called and wanted to see me. She around?"

He looked up at me through his overgrown bangs and said, "No 'Congrats on the engagement, bro'?"

I laughed. "Sure. Congrats on getting married when I do. Great timing."

He hung up the phone and tossed it across the room - it landed softly on a pile of clothes that were waiting to be folded. "God, you're anal. It's not like I said, Gee, Sum, let's get married at the exact time Suze is. I think that would really send her over the edge." He lifted up the register - not an easy feat; it looked heavy - and pressed some sort of restart button. "Summer's the one that wanted to get married."

"Why?" I asked - because I seriously didn't know why anyone would want to marry Jake. Ew. Just ew.

"Her parents don't like us living together, or whatever."

"So? Andy and Mom don't like me and Jesse living together . . . "

"Yeah, but that's different. I want to take this place -" he nodded to his store "- regional - maybe into the whole state. And her parents - well, they're _loaded_. Like with butlers and maids and stuff." The register started up again, and he started tapping on it. "So if I can get them on my side . . . "

" . . . Oh my God," I said. I seriously couldn't believe him.

"Anyways," he said. The phone had started ring and he went to pick it up. "Too much for your six-figure-husband mind to process. Sum's upstairs," he finished, then answered the phone.

I opened the door that said _Employees_ _Only_ on it and went up the flight of stairs to the apartment door. Then I knocked.

Summer flung it open, and smiled when she saw me. She was wearing a wet-suit top and a pair of shorts.

And it was like sixty-two outside.

But whatever floats your boat, right?

"Suze!" She cooed. "I'm so glad to came! Come in, come in."

She ushered me into the apartment - which was amazingly different since she had moved in. Everything in it looked like it should have been in Pier One.

She sat next to me on the leather couch and sighed. "I'm so sorry that I'm kind of ruining your wedding," she sad quietly.

I faked a laugh. "You aren't. Don't worry."

The relief in her eyes made her face even more beautiful - which made me a little mad. Why did she have to be so pretty? And I bet she could fit into a two . . .

"I was so worried you were going to be mad. But I promise it won't interfere with your wedding at all. It's going to be in October. And in LA."

"Don't worry about it," I lied. Actually I wanted her to worry about it. Worry all night long . . .

"And I want you to be a bridesmaid, too. Because we'll be sisters, right? Well, half sister's-in-law," she said, rolling her eyes a little.

"I've been meaning to ask you the same thing." Wait . . . WHAT? It sounded like something Jesse would make me say. And I'm pretty sure it came out of my mouth . . .

"Really?" she asked, her blue eyes bright. Then she laughed. "I would love to be your bridesmaid!"

"Ditto," I said kind of quietly.

Flick - Jake's huge German Shepherd - came out from the bedroom, whining and licking his chops. Summer shushed him and started talking about her wedding plans.

"My parents want me to get married in LA, so all their friends came come. There is this amazing church . . . it has all this awesome stained-glass and stuff. And I was thinking about having the reception at the Art Museum . . ."

Summer was an artist too. If fact, she had sketched out the tattoo on her back - which was a heart, only with vines and birds and stuff coming off it.

I couldn't even draw a stick person.

"And I think I want the colors to be white, sea-blue, and maybe a touch of green. I saw in _Brides Weekly_ that green was coming in this fall. Also. . . "

I tuned Summer out and watched Flick, who was pacing back and forth with his tail between his legs. He would occasionally come over to Summer and lick her leg, but she would just ignore him.

He reminded me of Spike before a storm comes. Only the spaz of a cat would climb on top of the refrigerator and start meowing.

Then it hit me. Storms. Spazing.

Oh God.

That's when I noticed Summer's drink shaking on the coffee table. Then I could feel it under my feet.

Summer stopped talking about color pallets and looked outside the window.

"Oh my God . . . " she started.

"Get down!" I yelled to her, but not fast enough. She had just hit her knees when the massive picture above the couch came crashing off it's hook - barely missing me, but landing on Summer with a loud thud.

It took a few seconds for the shaking to stop, but when it did all I could hear was Summer screaming.

"Summer!" I yelled, getting down next to her. "You're fine! Just . . . just don't move!"

Of course they had taught us how to deal with these situations in nursing school. First stay calm. Make the patent stay completely still.

The door swung open and Jake ran threw, landing on his hands and knees beside Summer.

"Baby," he said, his hand shaking when he reached out to touch her. Summer was crying.

"Jake!" I yelled. "Help me get this off her! Summer, DON'T MOVE."

Jake and I managed to lift the picture off her and move it aside - but not easily. It had to weigh forty pounds. Next I made Jake get me a knife, which I cut Summer's now bloody wet-suit shirt off with. I could see she had had Jake's name tattooed inside the heart on her lower back.

I could also see the little pieces of glass from the front of the picture frame embedded in her back, as well as a long, shallow cut from the edge of the frame.

But, luckily, nothing serious.

"You're fine, Summer," I said, relieved.

Jake didn't look so sure. "Do we have to take her to the hospital? Should I call 911?"

"No. I think I can handle it. Get me some tweezers, some rubbing alcohol, and a big Band-Aid. Oh, and a towel."

He lurched to his feet to do that, and I leaned down and rubbed Summer on the back of the head. "You're going to be fine," I promised. There's just some glass in your back. But I can get it out."

She nodded, tears still falling down her face.

Jake held Summer's hand and even got her a pillow and whipped off her face with a damp towel while I pulled the little pieces of glass out. There was about twenty-three of them.

Then I took a cotton swab (also fetched for me by Jake) and whipped all the cuts off with alcohol, the but Band-Aids on the places that were bleeding.

The whole time Jake stayed by Summer, stroking her face and telling her she was fine, and that he loved her.

We helped her up and to the bed, and I told her to lay off the surfing for a few days.

Jake thanked me a million times, but I reminded him it _was_ my job. Still, he said he owed me a big one.

Oh, okay, how about you don't get married until the year after I get married, huh? Could you do that?

But that was rude, I know. So I just said good-bye and left.

I was relieved to see my car was unharmed my the earthquake - as well as everything else.

Except the Shag Wagon. It had lost a rim on one of the tires.

When I opened my phone - which I had left in the car - it said 37 Missed Calls.

Seriously. 37. That was a new record for Jesse.

I called him back.

"Where," he answered frantically, "have you been?"

"Um, well, I was at Summer and Jake's and this huge picture landed on Summer, so I had to do some improve nursing . . . I'm sorry."

He sighed. "So you're alright?" It was kind of funny that he didn't ask about Summer.

"I'm fine. I guess. Just kind of ticked at Jake. I'll tell you later."

I heard some yelling in the background, then Jesse sighed and said, "I have to go."

"Oh. Okay. Just be home by five, okay?"

"Why?" he asked. I gulped.

See, I hadn't told him about Paul's party yet. I decided that I would put on my new Tori Burch dress when he came in and tell him then . . . that way he couldn't resist.

Only Jesse had a bad habit of being late.

"Just, um, well, we were invited to a party."

"Paul's party, right?"

I stopped my car in the parking lot, baffled. "How do you know?"

"The invitation came in the mail two weeks ago. I just wanted to see how long it took you to tell me. I really have to go. Keep your phone with you. I love you."

Then he hung up. The stinker.

_L7L7L7L7L7L7 _

I started to get ready for the party at four. Jesse was home by five-fifteen, and came to kiss my cheek before he turned on the shower.

"You're late . . . " I mumbled, taking the mascara wand through my eye lashes.

"I know," he sighed.

I finished getting dressed and went to wait in the living room. Jesse came out a little later, fooling with the buttons on his shirt.

Mmmm . . . he looked good enough to eat.

Especially the way he wore his first three buttons unbuttoned . . . he has a thing about tight clothes around his neck. I can't really blame him.

I stood up and fixed the collar of his shirt, and he put his head on my shoulder and whispered, "_Hermosa_," in my ear.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"Beautiful," he whispered.

"Well, you're_ tres beau_. That means very handsome in French."

He pulled away just enough to look in my eyes, then, smiling, he kissed my nose.

"Are you ready?" he asked. I nodded.

We took Jesse's car instead of mine. I had a fear of tight parking and party-goers with too much champagne in their system.

Jesse didn't seem to mind.

"How to we get to this -" insert Spanish word "- party?"

Okay, he did mind. But more about Paul than the car.

"I have directions, smarty pants. Take a left at the light."

He did.

"So," he started. "Tell me why you are 'ticked' at Jake."

"Because, the whole reason he's marrying Summer is to get in her parent's wallet. So he can mass-franchise his surf shop."

Jesse didn't say anything.

"And then Summer asked me to be one of her bridesmaids, so I can't really be rude about the wedding, since I'm in it."

"Have you asked her to be your bridesmaid?"

"Well, I kind of have to. Take a right here."

Jesse was quiet a little longer, then he asked when their wedding was.

"October. And it's in LA."

"So why are you angry?"

"Because, Jesse, her parents are loaded, she's going to have a huge wedding, and she's going to be a prettier bride than me."

Oops. Didn't mean to say that last one.

Jesse stopped the car (luckily we where at a stop sign) and said, "Susannah, don't say that. You are so much more beautiful than Summer."

This choked me up a little. I was expecting him to say "You're going to be a beautiful bride" or "I think you're being silly". But to put Summer's beauty down while uplifting mine - well, that was the sweetest thing Jesse had said to me in a while.

Except for something he had said this morning.

"I just want everyone to remember our wedding and not theirs."

Now he told me I was being silly. "Besides," he countered, "Your family will remember both of your weddings." When this didn't cheer me up, he said, "We will remember our wedding better - and isn't that all that matters?"

I smiled at him and held his hand. "You're too good, Jesse."

He smiled back at me, then frowned at what he saw out of the dashboard.

Paul's house - the largest one on the block - maybe even the entire beach - was flooded with people. Seriously. We had to park on the sidewalk four houses away.

"Well," Jesse said when I met him on the street. "I guess Slater has made quite a few friends." Then he added darkly, "Or enemies."

"Jesse," I sighed, exasperated. "You have to promise me you're going to be nice. Please. It's been like six years since you have seen him. Let bygones be bygones." He mumbled something in Spanish, and I sent him a look out of the corner of my eyes.

(And may I say in the moonlight with his royal blue shirt matching his olive skin so nicely, and his crisp black hair blowing back a little as we walked, he looked A. MAZE. ING. I could have totally taken him right there, in front of all those people.)

"You owe me, Susannah," he said a little - but not much - more loudly than what he had said in Spanish.

The line of people led up the brick stairs and through the open doorway, where I could see a ton more milling around.

I had been to parties thrown by Paul before. Like the one our Senior year when I walked in on Brad and Debbie doing the dirty in the bathroom.

My left eye twitched for a month.

But that party was wild - beer, naked girls, loud music . . .

. . . This party, on the other hand, was very different. Really different.

Instead of seeing topless girls doing the Cha-Cha Slide on the dining room table, I saw of sophisticated men and women with martinis and wine chatting with each other.

And instead of hearing Usher or Diddy thumping over huge speakers, there was a classical pianist and harpist.

I know! A harp!

"Are you sure we have the right house?" Jesse asked with a smile as we made our way down the stairs that opened onto the living room floor.

A waiter came by an offered us a martini and some kind of little weenie thing.

(The only thing Paul used to offer at his parties was Jell-O shots.)

Jesse and I walked around for a while looking for Paul. Well, I was looking for Paul. I think Jesse was just tagging along to see what other food he could find.

It took us twenty minutes to get through the entire house, and we never found Paul. Jesse finally got tired of walking around and pulled me through the large doors that led to the backyard.

There was no one in the backyard - which was just a huge pool surrounded by shrubbery. I immediately took off my heels (which were killing me. Prada shoes fit my feet awfully) and sat down on the edge of the pool, dipping my feet in the warm water. (I wondered how much it must cost to heat this thing. I know that the pool Andy had had put in last year had cost a fortune to heat . . . and it was half the size of this one!)

Jesse joined me, only he keep his feet dry.

"So where is the host?" he asked conversationally.

"I don't know. I wish I could find him, so he knows we came." I lifted my legs from the pool and watched the water run off them before I put them back. "I want to go _home_. This party is so boring."

Jesse laughed. "Slater _has_ always known how to change his tastes to suit the ones he's around."

I looked over at Jesse, who was watching my legs in the pool. "Do you think we should just leave?"

He looked at me and smiled. "You don't want to be here for the new year?"

I rolled my eyes. "I could think of _much_ better ways to ring in midnight."

That got a great smile out of Jesse: he showed all his perfect, white teeth and his black eyes sparkled. Then he leaned over and put his hand on the back of my neck, his fingers gently stroking my hair.

"Like what?" he asked, his smile remaining.

"Well," I mused, leaning closer to his lips, which looked so full and soft in the moonlight, "I guess I could give you a little hint . . . "

I started the kiss, gently pushing my lips to his. He made it better by pushing my lips open with his tongue, which he slipped inside my mouth.

The effect of this was amazing. I felt every hormone in my body go ZING...ON all at once. Jesse only pulled himself closer, pushing against me so my boobs were squished against his hard chest.

I threw my arms around him neck and pulled him closer too. Because I liked they way my boobs felt on his chest. Especially since I wasn't wearing a bra . . .

"Um, I'm sorry to interrupt."

I pulled away and looked up into Paul's blue eyes, then sent him a shy smile.

"Oh. Um, sorry. Just kind of got caught up in the moment."

Jesse let go of me - he seemed a little ticked that Paul had ruined our moment - and stood up to shake his hand.

"Slater," he said casually.

"De Silva," Paul greeted back. At least they were being decent. "Nice to see you again."

I am glad to report that while Paul had stayed the same height - maybe six-one - Jesse was now a good two-and-a-half inches taller. I guess soul transfer brings out some unused hormones.

"So," I said, standing up too. I picked up my heels and kept them in my right hand - those things weren't going back on until they had to. "I've been looking everywhere for you, Paul. You completely disappeared."

He shrugged. "I've been around. I didn't think you would show. I never got your RSVP."

I threw a look at Jesse, who made busy by taking my heels from me. "Yeah," I said to Paul, "Sorry about that. Kind of skipped my mind, I've been so busy."

"Oh, yeah. The wedding." He seemed a little less chipper. "Why did you wait so long?" he asked Jesse, a little hotly. His tone made my cheeks flush.

"I wanted to finish school, so I could support her better," Jesse said back, his tone a tad harsh as well.

"Yeah. Isn't that sweet, Paul? Well, we were just going . . . "

Paul took his eyes off Jesse and looked at me instead. "Leaving? Why? You just got here."

"Well, we've been here a while, actually. And we have another party to go to." (_Please don't say anything, Jesse . . . Please don't say anything . . . _)

Paul looked a little disappointed, but he just sighed and said, "Don't forget to send me an invitation, Suze."

I could feel Jesse's eyes boring into me when I stuttered, "I . . . I won't, Paul."

He smiled. "Well, goodnight, then. I'll see you soon - hopefully."

Jesse said what I hoped was the same under his breath (only it was in Spanish, so I couldn't tell) and tugged on my hand to go.

"Right," I said. "Bye, Paul."

When we got to the car I told Jesse he had been a little rude.

"He was rude, too," Jesse barked, then sighed. "I'm sorry. It isn't your fault." He looked over at me and smiled. "Do you really just want to go home?" he asked.

"Why? Do you have a better idea?"

He drove into Carmel and past the mission (I wondered what Father D. was up to. New Year's Eve party with the nuns?), then onto the road that was by the beach.

Then to the Point.

There were a few other cars parked along the guardrail . . . none of them as nice as Jesse's Beamer, of course. I don't think many people over twenty come here.

But the way Jesse parked away from all the other cars and turned to smile at me, dimming the headlights at the same time, brought back wonderful memories - of Saturday nights when we would come here and make out for a few hours, or after my junior and senior proms.

Or the RLS Angels, a painful memory I try to block.

Jesse turned down the radio so it was just a tiny beat in the background, then he leaned across the gearshift and put his hand on the back of my neck, the way he had earlier.

Then he asked, smile still on his lips, "Paul is coming to our wedding?"

My heart went from sailing to sinking.

"Can't we talk about this later? Like, tomorrow? We're going to have a pretty long car ride to LA . . . "

He took his other hand and stroked my cheekbone, all the way up to my ear. I felt chill bumps rise up on my arms. "I'm not going to yell at you. I just want to know if you think it's a good idea, inviting Paul."

"Sure it's a good idea. Paul's my . . . my friend."

Jesse leaned forward so his nose rested on mine, and so his black, wonderful eyes were all I saw. "Did he trick you into inviting him? Because it's your wedding - he doesn't have to come if you don't want him to."

But the truth was I didn't know if I wanted him to come or not. I mean, things between us had always been so . . . weird since we had gone back to save (and return with) Jesse. It was always like we had a mutual agreement not to talk about his apparent lust for me - even though we both knew it was there.

And after high school we never talked again. Last I heard he was going to Duke to be a lawyer. I thought he would stay there, too. I mean, where ever Duke is.

So why had he come back? There wasn't many lawsuits in Carmel, I was sure.

"I . . . I don't know, Jesse. I'm kind of confused about the whole Paul thing right now."

Jesse just stared at me, his black eyes searching mine. Finally he sighed. "We'll talk about it tomorrow," he whispered, his breath hot on my face, and kissed me.

It had been a while since we had made out. Because, to tell you the truth, once you start sleeping together you kind of lose your taste for just kissing.

But it was nice to just kiss - for a while, at least. We eventually ended up both in the driver's seat - me straddling Jesse's lap - with my dress unzipped and Jesse's shirt somewhere on the floorboard. Which was nice, too.

And we were about to go for it (like I was trying to undo Jesse's belt and thanking God I hadn't worn a bra) when I saw a little light out of the corner of my eye.

I pulled away from Jesse and looked over at the passenger seat, where Lea was smirking at us.

"Enjoying yourselves?" she asked.

I just stared at her. Jesse rested his head on the headrest and said something in Spanish between pants.

"What do _you_ want?" I muttered.

"I want _you_ to break up Ben and Kristen. Simple as that."

I kept staring, thinking of the easiest place I could hurt her - the eyes were always good . . .

Jesse, sensing that I was about to make a jump for her face, grabbed my hands and asked, "Why would you want us to do that? They both seem happy with each other. In fact, Ben hasn't been this happy in a while."

"Yeah," I said, but Jesse shushed me.

Lea opened her eyes a little wider. She obviously hadn't counted Jesse in on this. "I just . . . it isn't fair. That she can just steal him away like that."

Jesse raised his scarred eyebrow. "Steal him away? Lea, he hasn't been happy in over a year. And he likes Kristen."

"But she's a slut!"

"Hey!" I yelled, going for her face again. Jesse reached out and pulled me back.

"Susannah, hush. Lea, if you truly loved Ben you would want him to be happy. And he's happiest with Kristen - at least right now."

Her big lips pouted. "But . . . You don't know what it's like! To have someone you love - and who loves you - lose you forever! It . . . it sucks."

Jesse clinched his jaw while I prayed he wouldn't say _Oh, I know. I was dead too, once . . ._

Because if Lea found out we - or I, really - could bring her back to life . . . we would be in it. Deep.

But Jesse just sighed and shook his head. "It doesn't matter, Lea. You are obviously still here because Ben isn't happy . . . And now that he is, you can't except it."

"And what if I do except it? What happens then?"

"You move on," I said flatly. "To . . . heaven. Or hell. Or another life. Whichever floats your boat."

She glared at me. "So I'm just gone? I'll never see Ben again? Why the hell would I want that?"

"Because," I said though gritted teeth, "You love Ben. And he would be happy. Got it?"

I knew it wasn't like that: the whole if you love him, you'll set him free thing. Not at all.

And I also knew that, unlike Jesse and me, it wouldn't work out so great for Lea. I mean, she would never be with Ben again - Kristen or not.

But she didn't have to smash Jesse's radio with her fist and disappear like she did - leaving me to quickly go back to my seat while Jesse said a bunch of Spanish words about his radio.

When he finally put it in reverse I whispered, "It's midnight."

"Happy New Year," he mumbled.

_L7L7L7L7_

"Get up," Jesse breathed in my ear the next morning. I groaned and pushed him away, then pulled the covers over my head.

He wasn't giving up, though.

"I mean it, Susannah," he whispered, putting his hand on my thigh and rubbing it in circular motions. "We have to leave."

"WHHHHY?" I groaned, turning on my back. I opened my eyes and looked directly into Jesse's, which were shinning in the little bit of light that was coming through our curtains.

"Because," he said gently, leaning over to kiss my neck. "We are going on our trip, remember?"

Oh yeah. Our trip. At least I can sleep in the car . . .

I got up and stumbled to the bathroom, then flipped on the light and looked in the mirror. My hair was a tumbling mass of waves around my face - which looked plain with no eyeliner or mascara. I sighed and rummaged through the bag of make up I had packed last night.

Jesse came in a few seconds later, turning on the shower and leaning against it while it got warm, arm folded across his chest.

I tried to ignore him, but it was hard - he looked so wonderful in his blue boxers and with his bed-mused hair. I finally put down my eyeliner pencil and went to go lean on him.

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head.

"Are you still mad about the radio?" I asked, fingering his silky chest hair - it was so sexy!

"Let's just say we'll take your car, _querida_."

"Okay," I said, mid-yawn. I watched Jesse kiss the top of my head again in the mirror.

"I think the water is warm," he whispered to me. I sighed. I didn't want to let him go; he was so warm.

But I pushed off of him and went back to the mirror, watching out of the corner of my eye as he stripped down and closed the shower door.

Finishing with my make up (my hair could just be wavy - I didn't care) I found my most comfortable stretchy jeans and a t-shirt and put them on.

Jesse joined me in the closet a few minutes later (I was trying to close my suitcase) and put on some jeans and a shirt too, then picked up both our bags and started for outside.

I went in the kitchen and poured myself a bowl of cereal, then sat on the couch and stared at the opposite wall while I chewed.

"Are you hungry?" I asked Jesse when he came back in.

"Not really," he said, and came to sit down with me. "Will you call Josafina? I need to ask her something."

Jesse couldn't "call" ghosts like I could . . . nor was he a "shifter". He relied on me to do that for him.

So I thought about Josafina . . . and, suddenly, she was there.

"Are you going somewhere?" she asked politely.

"Um, yes," Jesse answered. "On a trip - but just for a few days. I was wondering if you would feed Spike, my cat."

Josafina's eyes lit up. "You have a cat? You always hated mine . . . "

Jesse smiled. "Well, yours were always getting in the way. Let me show you his food."

I watched Jesse show his sister where the cat food was, how much to pour, and where to get the water. She watched him with adoring eyes.

After he had explained a few more things (how Spike was a little mean, how the faucet worked, and why we were going on a trip) Jesse said goodbye to his sister, then eyed me until I did the same.

I locked the door after we walked outside, then followed Jesse to . . . his car?

"I thought we were taking mine . . . " I started. Jesse shrugged.

"I like my car better. Besides, it might be nice not to have a radio for a while."

I smiled, then frowned. He wanted to talk about Paul.

Kristen was already at Ben's (or maybe she never left?) and they were ready to go. Ben, who had made the drive before, drove ahead of us.

Trying to not talk about Paul for as long as I could, I slept until we stopped for lunch.

But after lunch Jesse didn't want to talk about Paul. He wanted to talk about us instead.

"Us?" I asked, a little hesitant. "Are you breaking up with me?"

He smiled. "What do you think, Susannah?"

My phone vibrated in my lap - a text message from Kristen.

_Ben just called me his gf!! :)_

_Awesome :D_ I texted back.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked Jesse.

"Well," he started, "I was talking to Dr. Ferguson," (Dr. Ferguson oversaw Jesse and all the other resident doctors at the hospital), "and he said that he had had several calls from patients, um, praising my bedside manor, I guess you could say. He has had so many, in fact, that a few hospitals have contacted him about hiring me when I finish my residency."

"What?" I asked.

"Well, I've been offered several future positions - shift director, private practices, even, well, an incredible offer by UCLA."

"How incredible?"

"They said that - when I finish my residency - they would pay to move my family - meaning you - and help us put a down payment on a new home . . . all if I come to work in their ER."

"Jesse," I breathed.

Live in LA? Like . . . where movie stars lived? And the shopping! And the restaurants! And the beaches!

I knew it. I knew those four long years Jesse was gone to UCSF (University of California at San Francisco) at medical school was worth it! I knew all those nights I cried myself to sleep because I missed him so much would pay off!

All the gas I spent driving to see him on the weekends . . . all the minutes I went over on my cell phone . . . all the crying, the depression . . .

Finally had payed off.

Because my (future) husband had come back an amazing, talented doctor - with a great bedside manor!

Oh, and we were going to be rich. And live in LA. And I was going to live right by the Coach store, and have my butler shine my Lexus every morning before I went to pick up the latest Armani jeans for me and Jesse. And I was going to have a nanny for my kid (because, sorry Jesse, I was only squeezing out one) and a maid for my Chihuahua, Taco, and I was going to be as gorgeous as the ladies on _Desperate Housewives_ (only, you know, with out all the cheating and murder and stuff).

"Susannah?" Jesse called, and I woke up from my fantasy and looked over at him. "But the thing is . . . I don't know if I want to take any of the offers."

The vision of myself cruising down Sunset Boulevard in my new bright red convertible Lexus popped. "What? Are you crazy, Jesse?"

He flushed a little. "I . . . I have always wanted my own practice, Susannah. The emergency room is so . . . hectic. And awful, sometimes. I want to know my patents, _querida_." He sighed. "I don't know yet. I still have a few years to decide." His fingers tightened on the steering wheel. "What do you think?"

I realized why he had gripped the steering wheel: he wanted my opinion. And my opinion was a big thing for him to consider.

I remember what he had told me before he went of to UCSF. I had been complaining about not seeing him, and how much I was going to miss him. He had wrapped his arms around me and said, "Susannah, I'm doing this not just for me - but for us. For our life together. Because the only way I can afford to keep you up is to be a doctor." That made me mad, but then he said, more seriously, "Susannah, all I want is for you to be happy. That is why I am doing this."

And I was pretty sure he still had the same outlook on it.

"Jesse . . . I don't know. This is your decision."

"No it isn't," he said. "It's ours. It's our family."

_Our family_. The words sent chills up my spine.

"I . . . I think that we would have a lot more money if you took a big job. But I also think you would be happier if you had your own practice." I sighed. "We have a lot to do this year. Let's just see where we are when you finish your residency. How about that?"

He smiled. "That sounds good."

Never had I wanted a radio so badly.

Note to readers - Jesse spent 4 years at the same collage Suze went to (which was close to home) and did his pre-med stuff . . . the other 4 he transfered to UCSF for medical school. jsyk.


	9. Chapter 9

_i was just reading the forum for best authors and saw i was on there . . . it mad me sad. then i read this chapter and have mixed feelings on it. i cant wait until they get back home! jk i think you'll like it :) and then to top it all off i found out i was going to have to pay for my iPhone bill and and and personal training for tennis next month. but i do get my iphone friday (7.11.08 a day that will always live in my heart), which rocks. and my 17th is coming up, which rocks. and i get to eat red velvet cake and chicken and dumplings in sunday which ROCKSS (going to need some serious PT after that) and im going to disney and the beach this month which rocks, and i just got back from atlanta and saw some really big fish, which rocks. and then i threw in an awesome dress voting contest thing for my readers at the bottom of this post which RROOCCKKSS _

_haha _

_L7L7L7_

Jesse circled the parking lot at the Manor Hotel for the third time. Finally he sighed, exasperated, and said, "Why don't you go check in? I'll be there when I park. _If_ I park."

I opened the passenger door when he circled back up to the front and hurried to get out. Jesse was in a bit of a mood - but I would be to if I had been driving all day. Not to mention it was nearly midnight.

Also not to mention without a radio.

I went up to the front desk, where a tired looking lady stood texting on her cell phone. When she saw me she forced a smile and set down her phone.

I looked around for Ben and Kristen - they must have already check in and gone to their room. They, unlike us, had found a parking space.

"I'm, um, here to check in."

"What's the name?" the lady asked. Her name tag said Haley.

"De Silva."

She stared at me.

"DE SILVA," I said again.

"Spell it for me, honey," she said, still staring.

I sighed. "De Silva. Little D, little E, capital S, little I, little L, little V, little A. DE SILVA."

She punched her keyboard a few times and asked, "Jesse de Silva?" I nodded. "I'll need some identification."

"But my boyfriend - I mean fiance, whatever - is parking the car."

She shrugged. "No ID no room. Sorry."

To my relief Jesse came through the door at that second, towing both our bags. He was also soaked - a quick look outside showed the sky had opened up.

I smiled. My hero.

"She needs your ID, Jesse," I said, taking our bags.

He sighed and pulled out his wallet, then showed her his driver's license.

I noticed Haley's mood had dramatically changed since Jesse walked in. Now she was all smiles.

"Welcome to LA, Mr. de Silva. I'm sorry it stared raining."

He shrugged. "That's alright. It was bound to happen." He sent her a smile, making the girl blush and go in the back room to program our keys.

"What are you doing?" I asked him when she was out of earshot.

He gave me one of his exasperated looks. "Do you want to go to bed?"

"Yes . . ."

"Well," he said, looking at his watch, "I'm just hurrying the process."

"You don't have to flirt," I said quietly. He looked at me again, then picked up my left hand and twisted my engagement ring.

"This means forever, _querida_," he said simply. But it was enough to ground me. I pushed off my tippy-toes and kissed his cheek.

Haley came back and gave us our keys, then had Jesse sign all the papers. Finally we got on the elevator.

"What room are we in?" I asked, taking Jesse's wet leather jacket (a birthday present from _moi_) and shaking the water off it.

"Seven-twenty," he said, then sighed. The elevator couldn't go slower.

I rested my head on his strong shoulder

"I love you," I whispered, and looked up at him.

He was looking down at me with a little smile. "_Te amo_," he whispered back.

"What does that mean?"

"I love you too."

I watched the numbers go up . . . 4 . . . 5 . . . 6 . . .

"_Je t'aime_," I whispered, my eyes closing.

"What does that mean?" Jesse asked. The elevator doors opened.

"I love you. In French."

I barely got my bag in the door before I staggered to the maroon-checkered chair and closed my eyes. The last thing I remember Jesse was taking off my shoes and lifting me up in his wonderfully strong arms.

_L7L7L7L7_

The next morning I woke up to my butt vibrating.

Oh, wait. That's my phone. Sorry.

I fished around in my jeans pocket and pulled it out, then flipped it open and mumbled, "Hello?"

"Suze! You up yet? Ben and I are at breakfast. You two need to come down."

"Come down where?" I asked, opening an eye to read my clock. It was nine-thirty.

"To the breakfast bar. They have pancakes . . . "

My stomach rumbled. "Okay, we'll be there in a sec . . . " I closed my phone and threw it across the room. It landed with a thud against the opposite wall.

"Who were you talking to?" I heard Jesse ask.

I turned my head to look at him. He was shirtless, and his muscular bare arms were wrapped around his pillow, which his head was resting on. His hair was sexily mused and the stubble on his cheeks and chin made his face look darker.

But still amazing.

"Um, Kristen. I think. I don't know. I just woke up."

He smiled and pushed some waves of hair out of my face. "I should have taken off your jeans last night. I'm sorry."

I shrugged. "It's okay. I still slept good."

"So did I."

We stared at each other for a while, just smiling. I couldn't get over how wonderful he looked, with his hair and the stubble and all. Good enough to eat. Or at least taste . . .

I scooted closer to him and pushed my lips to his - just barely, but just enough. Then I traced them with my tongue.

Mmmm. Delicious.

"Are you hungry?" he asked when I pulled away a little.

"No," I lied, but my growling stomach gave me away. Jesse smiled at me.

"Let's get dressed, _querida_," he whispered, lips gently touching mine. "We can play under the blankets later."

_L&L&L_

We managed to snag some cereal before they closed the breakfast bar. Kristen and Ben - who were sitting at a window seat - seemed to already have the day planed out; walk around downtown, eat lunch, go shopping.

Okay, so maybe _Kristen_ planed the day. Ben - who might have been the worst morning person I had ever met - just sat in his chair drinking his coffee.

We all piled up in the Beamer: Jesse and me up front, Kristen and Ben in the back. I watched Kristen lean her head on his shoulder and whisper something to him in the rearview mirror. This got a grin out of Ben.

"Where are we going again?" Jesse asked grouchily. I sighed.

"You take a right here, Jesse."

Kristen whispered to Ben again, and he cleared his throat and asked, "What happened to your radio?"

I looked over at Jesse, my eyes wide. Jesse was obviously panicking in his head. He finally muttered, "Someone tried to steal it."

Ben leaned forward and played with an exposed wire. "They sure did a crappy job."

I watch, with some horror, as Lea leaned forward to grab Ben's hand.

"Benny," she whispered. "I did it. It was me. I smashed it."

Jesse and I exchanged a look.

Ben leaned back in his seat and took another sip of his coffee. Lea, who was sitting next to him - opposite Kristen - , gently took her French-tipped nails through his hair. "Ben," she whispered again. "It's me, baby. It's Lea. Can't you hear me?" Her voice rose. "Can't you feel me!?"

"I think you turn here," Ben said quietly, unaware that his former fiancee was having a panic attack beside him.

"SUZE!" Lea yelled, so loudly my head pounded in protest. "Tell him I'm here! Tell him!"

I made eye contact with her in the mirror and slowly shook my head.

"DO IT!!" she screeched - and suddenly the car lurched to a stop, sending us all forward in our seats, luckily caught by the seatbelts.

"What the hell?" Kristen asked. Ben was trying to save his coffee from spilling.

I sent Jesse a look, and he sent me a darker one back.

"You didn't see that cat?" he asked.

"Cat? What cat?" I looked back to see what Lea was making of all this . . . then saw she was gone.

"There was a cat," Jesse said flatly. "I think it got past us, though." He started driving again.

Kristen shot me a look from the backseat - _Is he okay?_

I knew he was fine, though. Brilliant, more I like it. Because he made Lea think she had done something by screaming . . .

. . . causing her to disappear like the wimp she was.

I know, I know. My (future) husband is amazing. You don't have to tell me.

We finally made it to downtown and (luckily) found a parking spot. Then we all got out - and I noticed Ben give Kristen a playful smack on the butt before she stood up.

Oh, God. Weren't we supposed to be the ones madly in love over here?

I got on the sidewalk with Jesse and took his hand while we watched our two friends mess around on the other side of the car for a minute.

"Um, can we leave them?" Jesse asked. "I'm sure we'll see them later."

I smiled up at him. "Now, Jesse. We used to be like this . . . oh, wait. No we weren't."

"And would you really have wanted us to be, _querida_?"

I shrugged. He had a point there.

The love birds finally emerged from behind the car, hand in hand.

"Ready?" I asked. Kristen sent me a big smile and nodded.

I was amazed by all the shops. They were so beautiful . . .

. . . I felt Jesse grab my hand and pull me closer to him.

"_Querida_," he said quietly. "You almost walked into the road."

"I'm sorry," I said, still looking around. "It's just the shopping . . . "

Jesse slipped an arm around my shoulders. "I understand, _querida_."

Kristen and I made it into a few shops, but not many. We ate lunch at a little street side cafe, and Lea joined us.

"Guacamole is fattening," she said when she appeared in the empty chair next to me.

I sent her a look before I put my loaded tortilla chip in my mouth.

"You have a wedding dress to fit in, you know."

I sighed and pushed my food away. Jesse, I noticed, was shooting Lea a look out of the corner of his eye.

"I have to use the restroom," I announced, and got up.

Lea followed me into the bathroom. I checked under all the stalls to make sure we were alone before turing to her and hissing, "What the _hell_, Lea?"

She started. "What do you mean, what the hell?"

"Why are you bothering me? _I'm_ not dating Ben."

She shrugged and hopped up on the vanity. "Well, I decided if I'm not getting married, I might as well make sure you do. And that boyfriend of your's won't put up with cellulite."

I sighed and leaned against the nearest stall door._ Why? Why? Why?_

"Lea," I breathed. "He's happy with her. They like each other. Ben is acting like himself again. Doesn't that matter to you?"

"But she's still with him!" she shouted. The mirror beside her shook. "She's the one that gets to kiss him and hold hands with him and sleep with him . . . But I deserve it! I love him so much more!"

"I know that, Lea. Life's just not fair like that."

Like, for instance, how fair is it that, out of all the billions of people in the world, I'm a mediator. Me. Innocent old Suze.

Lea glared at me, tears in her eyes, and yelled a final, "Whatever!" before disappearing.

I sighed and looked at myself in the mirror. Talk about not fair.

When I came into view of Kristen she stood up and threw her purse on her shoulder. "We're going shopping!" she announced with a smile.

I looked at Jesse, who took my hand and kissed it. "Have fun, _querida_."

"Where will you be?" I asked, a little dejected.

"Ben and I are just going to walk around." He smiled, still holding my hand. "I'll call you in an hour or two, Susannah."

I wanted to shop . . . but I didn't want to leave Jesse.

Kristen was tugging on my arm to go. I gave Jesse's hand one more squeeze and left with Kristen. She linked her arm in mine.

"Victoria's Secret is having a HUGE sale," she said, pointing across the street to the biggest VS I had ever seen.

We crossed he street at the crosswalk and headed in the store. It was all pink and white and there was bright neon everywhere.

"I say we surprise our guys," she said with a smile. Then she pointed to a wrack that had a big 40 off sign - it was full of floaty nighties and lacy panties.

She went over to a pair of see-though underwear and held them up. "Ten dollars! Can you believe it?"

I found the perfect outfit to surprise Jesse: it was a tight red silk dress with black lace underwear and a bra to go under it.

I liked it because it was very classic, and also very Jesse. Kristen wanted me to get a corset and guarders like her, but I knew Jesse would like the dress better.

We finished our Victoria's Secret shopping spree and found our way into several boutiques, where I found a 3.1 Philip Lim dress, a Juicy Couture tote, a Martha Stewart sheet set (600 thread count!), and a pair of G&D sunglasses for a grand total of . . .

(Drum roll please)

. . . Six hundred and thirty four dollars, and seventy-eight cents.

I know. Jesse was going to kill me.

_L&L&L_

That night I pushed Jesse into the bed and told him to stay.

"Why?" he asked with a smile. (He was smiling because I hadn't told him how much money I had spent out of our "joint account".)

"Just . . . because I said so."

He raised the scarred eyebrow and I got off of him and went into the bathroom.

The underwear and bra fit me like a glove (a very tight, lacy glove) and the dress felt like water on my skin. I fluffed up my hair and put on some more lipgloss, then opened the bathroom door.

Jesse was sitting on the side of the bed, his arms across his chest. He had taken off everything but his briefs while I had been in the bathroom.

He smiled when he saw me.

"Jesse," I pretend scolded. "I told you to stay put."

He shrugged, still smiling. "I'm sorry."

I came and sat in his lap. "Sorry's not going to cut it, Jesse."

"What are you going to do to me?" he breathed, leaning closer.

I smiled and leaned in closer to his lips. "Punish you for being bad of cour--"

There was a loud boom, then a crash - I screamed, and Jesse almost dropped me.

"What was that?" I asked.

Jesse pushed me out of his lap and put on his jeans and shirt.

I followed him into the hall, not caring who saw my red nighty.

Ben was in the hall, as well as several other people. But not Kristen.

I went up to Ben, who was frantically begging a hotel employee to let him back in his room.

"Please," he groveled. "I'm a doctor. I swear I am. I could help her just as much as the paramedics could . . . "

Help her?

I shoved pasted Jesse and several other people to Ben, who the hotel person had just denied.

"Ben, where's Kristen?" I cried. I think I was having a panic attack. "WHERE IS SHE?"

"In there," he said, nodding to the room. "The TV just . . . exploded. I tried to help her, but the paramedics threw me out."

"Is she okay?"

Ben looked down at me, and for the first time noticed my dress. His eyebrows went up.

"She's okay. She just got cut up. I _at least_ got to look her over before I was thrown out." He shot his room a dirty look.

Jesse came up behind me in time to here that Kristen was okay. "But what about the TV?" he asked.

Ben shrugged. "We were just laying in bed-" (laying in bed. Riiight) "-and it just . . . exploded."

Um, yeah, I wanted to say. Because your crazy ex-fiance _blew it up._

But I held my tongue.

Kristen came out a second later, supported by a very bulky EMS.

She had some little scars on her face, arms, and legs, as well as a black eye. But not anything worse.

She pulled away from the EMS and ran to Ben, then started crying onto his shirt. He held her close and whispered to her.

The hotel manager kept apologizing for the TV (after the police decided it blew up because of a "short circuit". Yeah, I'll show them a short circuit. And it sure isn't the TV) and offered them a night's free stay.

"I think we'll just go home tomorrow," Ben told the guy. Then he looked at us. "But you two are welcome to stay."

I looked over at Jesse, who shook his head. "I think we will go home tomorrow, too."

_L&L&L_

_hey i have a new story! have you read it? its called There's a first time for everything. come R&R _

_Now its time for some fuuuun baybee! go to the forums page and help me pick suze's wedding dress!! there will be three links to go to the pages. votes in by 8/10/08 please :) you can total vote more than once...kind of like american idol haha jk...have a good one . . . windedeagle™_

_PS...who else stayed home all day sunday and watched wimbledon? i sure did...and didnt roger look NICE? i cant wait to see him beat the pants off nadal at the us open haha... _


	10. Chapter 10

_yea! chapter 10 :)_

I watched as the manicurist painted my toes nails a deep red.

It looked so grown up. So professional. So_ Yeah, I'm getting married, and I have sex with my totally hot fiance, and I'm reading the February/March issue of _Cosmo.

I turned back to my _Cosmo_ and flipped the page.

L7L7L7L7

When I came home Jesse was sitting at the kitchen table with bills all around him.

"Come here," he said. No _There's my beautiful querida_. No _Come give me a big kiss for working a twelve hour shift._

Just_ Come here_.

I gulped and sat my purse in the armchair, then slowly made my way to the kitchen table.

"Sit," he said, nodding to the chair beside him. I did.

He pushed a bank statement under my nose. I gasped at how much we were overdrawn.

"Do you realize," Jesse started in a growl, then his voice rose. "_Do you realize what this does? To our money? To our credit? To everything?_"

"Um," I started, but couldn't finish. Jesse was scaring me.

He lowered his voice to say, "Go get our debit card."

"But Jesse," I pleaded.

"The debit card and the Visa. Now! Go get it!"

I rose from my seat with all the dignity I could muster and brought him back my cards.

He didn't cut then up, to my relief, only stuck them in his pocket.

"You can't use them anymore, unless it's an emergency, understand?"

I nodded. He pushed another piece of paper under my nose.

"Meet our budget," he said.

It was awful to look at . . . we we're living on five hundred dollars a week!

"But Jesse-"

"This is it," he said. "Until you get a job when you finish school. Then things will be a lot less tight."

I looked at the paper again as my spring wardrobe flew out the window.

"Now," he said, putting all the bills in a pile. "the second thing. With all this _excessive spending_ we can't go to Barbados."

"But Jesse!"

"No buts," he said.

I sighed and got out of my chair, starting for the bathroom. Jesse grabbed my waist before I could walk away.

"I'm sorry, Susannah," he said, pulling me into his lap. "But you can't just spend money blindly. We are just starting out."

I mumbled something about it not being fair, and he laughed and kissed the top of my head.

"I like you nails," he said, nodding to my toes. "The color is very pretty."

"But Jesse!" I said, turning into his chest. "Five hundred a week?"

"Just until you graduate - which is what, in April, right? Didn't you say you thought you could finish in April?"

"I think," I mumbled. He hugged me tighter.

"You'll make it. Now, tell me where we should go eat dinner tonight."

It was Saturday. "You mean there's money in the budget for date night?"

He smiled. "Of course there is. I planed it out all very carefully."

"Let's go eat Japanese!"

He looked at me for a second, then sighed. "Fine. But no martinis or whatever you like to get. They're too expensive."

I sighed. I think this budget might be the end of me.

L7L7L7L7

We went to Shang - the local Japanese restaurant - for dinner. Jesse made us split a plate and made me get a Coke.

I know. A Coke.

He asked me when we got home if I wanted to take a bath.

I looked at him out of the corner of my eye in the bathroom mirror. He had already turned the faucet on.

I considered my anger towards him at the moment. I also considered the way his muscles flexed when he took off his shirt.

Okay. So I was a sucker for meat. So sue me.

I sat behind Jesse in the tub so that he could lean against me. I figured he needed it after working a twelve hour shift.

"I visited with Father Dominic on my lunch break today," Jesse said when I started to rub his shoulders. He rested his head against my chest.

"And he misses me terribly?"

"He did say you hardly come visit anymore."

I shrugged. "I'm a busy girl."

Jesse looked up at me, and I sent him a smile back.

"But he said he wanted to see us tomorrow. He needs to talk with us about something."

Hmm. Sounded peculiar . . .

"About what?"

It was Jesse's turn to shrug. "The wedding, I suppose."

The phone rang in the other room; Jesse sighed.

"Ignore it," I told him. "So how was working double-overtime?"

"_So_ much fun, _querida_. I really hope you can give me up for a few hours and decide _not_ work in the Emergency Room."

"You know, I read in _Cosmo_ that couples that work together have lower divorce rates?"

"You know, Susannah, that everything you read in _Cosmo_ isn't true?"

"Jesse," I whispered, appalled. "Take that back."

He smiled up at me. "You think it is the Bible or something."

"I guess you don't want to know the position of the month, then," I said, pushing him off of me.

He turned so he was over me. "What do you mean, position of the month?"

I laughed. "That's what I thought, Mr. de Silva."

L7L7L7L7

The next morning I woke up to Jesse's gentle kisses on my neck. I sighed and closed my eyes again. This was the life.

"Three months until the wedding," I told him.

He stopped kissing. "Three months? Already?"

I smiled at him and nodded. "I'm going to pick out a wedding cake with my mom after class tomorrow. You should come. It can be a family affair."

He looked pained. "I'm working another double tomorrow."

"Jesse! Why?"

He shrugged and kissed my neck again. "Resident hours. What can I say?"

I groaned. "But why can't you tell them you have to go eat cake?"

"Because, Susannah," he whispered against my neck, "I'm a _resident_. I don't make my hours. The doctors in charge of me do."

"Why? So they can go play golf?"

"Tennis, actually," he said, laying on top of me and kissing my lips.

I groaned again.

"Maybe I can get a long break," Jesse offered. "Then I can come and 'eat cake', then go back to work. Fair enough?"

"I guess," I mumbled. He kissed me again and rolled out of bed.

It was wonderful to see him make his way to the bathroom - completely naked.

L7L7L7L7

Father Dom was in his new "church office" - as he called it.

"I like the new place," I said after he invited us in.

"Thank you," he said. He went and took a seat in his new office chair. "Now I can finally keep my school affairs separate from my church affairs."

"I'm assuming where here on a church affair?" I asked.

"Well, it's about the wedding." He readjusted his glasses. "Now, Susannah, I want you to know that I didn't come up with this idea."

He looked between me and Jesse for a while, not saying anything.

"Spit it out, Father D!" I said.

He sighed. "Well, we have a new misnister of marriage, and he feel that all of the couples getting married in or by this church should . . . take pre-marriage classes."

"WHAT?" I yelled, outraged. "Jesse and I have been together for EIGHT YEARS, Father Dom! I think we are the least qualified!"

"I'm sorry, Susannah, I didn't make the rule," Father D. said calmly.

"But - come on! We're like family! Can't you do something?"

He sighed. "No one can surpass the rules, dear. Even you."

"But MARRIAGE CLASSES?"

Father Dom shot Jesse a look, and he leaned forward to grab my arm. "_Querida_," he whispered. "Let's just take the classes, alright? What harm can they be?"

"But we don't need marriage classes, Jesse."

He got a look like _AH, I get it now._ "Susannah, this isn't _counseling_."

"Right," Father D. said. "This is just a six-week course on marriage, Susannah. It isn't something for couples with problems."

I played with my hands. Jesse rubbed my arm. "We'll go. When do they start?"

"They are every Thursday night at seven. At the Carmel Baptist Church."

"But Father Dom," I whispered. "They're _baptists_."

"_Susannah_," he and Jesse both said, exasperated.

I rolled my eyes. "Lighten up, guys. I'm just kidding."

_L7L7L7L7_

My classes ended at three-thrity on Monday. I went to my parents house after.

I found my mom standing at the sliding doors to the back yard. I went to stand beside her.

Andy was outside on the deck, watching about ten huge men pour concert all around the pool.

"They said it will be dry by tomorrow, and we can lay the tile Wednesday," my mom said of their new deck. "I'm planning a little pool party Saturday. You and Jesse should come."

My mind rushed. I had to come up with an excuse. Something . . . something . . .

Nothing.

"Yeah," I said. "Maybe."

This made my mom happy, and me feel pretty guilty.

"Ready to go?" I asked.

My mom was so excited about the cake. We were going to a new bakery that specialized in wedding cakes. I read about it in_ Northern California Brides_.

Shut up, okay?

"So where have you registered?" my mom asked.

"Oh, um, Sears and Pier One and Saks Fifth Avenue--"

"Suze," my mom said, looking over at me from the passenger seat. "Saks is in New York."

"Actually, there is one in San Francisco." I only know this because when I visited Jesse when he was in college I would go and stand in front of it for hours and stare at all the Coach and Prada and Chanel . . .

"Suze, maybe you should register at more . . . well, less _expensive_ places. Like Walmart."

"_Walmart_?" I breathed. "What would I register for? _Toothpaste_?"

"Susannah Simon," I mom said. It kind of registered that in a few months she couldn't call me that. Unless she wanted to say _Susannah de Silva. _"There are plenty of things - expensive, nice things - in Walmart. You are acting so spoiled!"

I sighed and stared at the red light we were at. "Mom. This is my wedding."

"What are you saying?" my mom asked. "That I'm controlling your wedding?"

"No, Mom. I didn't mean it like that." I pulled into a parking spot by the bakery. "Look. Jesse's here," I said with some relief.

Jesse was leaning against his Beamer, his scrubs gleaming in the sunlight.

Okay. So his scrubs weren't gleaming. But he just looked so _hot_.

I jumped out of the car (as soon as it was in park) and went to kiss his cheek.

"Ready?" I asked him.

"Very," he whispered. Then he reached around and pinched my butt before my mom came around the car.

WOW.

The lady in the bakery (her name was Claire) was very happy to see us.

"I've been getting so busy!" she said. "I guess every one is getting married this year, huh?"

_Yeah_, I thought, thinking of a certain family member.

Claire went behind the counter and brought us a huge book of cakes.

"I can make anything you see in here," she said with a smile. The phone rang in the background and she excused herself.

I flipped though the pages quickly. To cutesy, to small, to green.

"Susie," my mom said, putting her hand on the book to stop me. "Slow down."

I sighed and went though more slowly. Too spring, too fall, too old-people.

"Wait," Jesse said. "You missed a page."

I flipped back to the page I missed . . .

. . . and there it was. My wedding cake.

"_Jesse_," I whispered. "I want that one!"

My mom leaned in to get a closer look.

"It's very big, Suze. How many guests did you say?"

"Like thirty or something. But Mom, _look_ at it."

She looked all right. Then she said, "Keep looking."

"Mom," I graveled.

I felt Jesse's hand on my back. "If that's what Susannah wants, though . . . " he said to my mom.

We both looked at Jesse. He had never - _ever_ - stuck up for me when it came to my mom.

My mom looked at me, then at Jesse, then back at me. "Well," she finally said. "It is your day. Your wedding."

I smiled and, behind my back, squeezed Jesse's hand.

Claire hurried back after she finished her phone call. She was ecstatic over my choice.

"This," she told me, "will be so beautiful. Why don't you go over there-" she pointed to the wall to the left, where a shelf stood "- and pick out your topper? I'll go ahead and ring this up."

My mom started asking her questions about the cake, and I grabbed Jesse's hand and pulled him over to the shelf.

There where several toppers to choose from: the classic bride and groom, each with a different combination of hair colors, as well as a bride and bride and a groom and groom. Jesse muttered something under his breath about this, but I ignored him.

"Here we are," I said, pulling the dark haired, Caucasian couple from the mix. Only Jesse wasn't Caucasian. Oh well.

I held the couple up to my face. The bride was so skinny!

Jesse looked too. "He's too short."

I laughed. "We'll just tell her to make the cake taller on that side."

"He's also too pale," he said, and reached in the basket to pull out another topper. He came back with a black/white couple.

"Don't be ridiculous," I said.

"But he looks nothing like me." Jesse held the little (white) couple up to his face. "See?"

I sighed and took it from him. "I'll just find one on the Internet, okay?"

"Okay," he said with a smile, then looked at the clock behind us. "I have to go, Susannah. I'll see you tonight."

"When will you be home?" I asked in a pleading voice.

Jesse shrugged. "No later than ten." He leaned down and kissed me. "Don't wait up, _querida_."

_L7L7L7L7_

Well, I did wait up. I wasn't tired anyways.

Jesse was home at ten sharp, his hair wet from the rain and five o'clock shadow on his cheeks and chin.

"Is it raining that hard?" I asked. Jesse nodded and came to lay down by me on the couch. He put his head in my lap.

"So," I said, combing his wet hair with my fingers. "I picked out invitations today. And a china pattern."

"Wonderful," he mumbled, and pushed his face into my stomach and kissed me. Butterflies erupted.

I wondered if he knew he could do that? Just turn me on by putting his lips on my stomach.

"Also," I said, trying and failing to control my speeding heart. "I talked to my grandmother. She wants us to stay with her when we come, which is really a good thing, since we would save some money not having to stay at a hotel."

"Wonderful," Jesse mumbled again.

I pushed his head out of my lap and went to lay on top of him.

"Are you tired?" I asked.

He opened his eyes and smiled. "Not really."

_L7L7L7L7_

Jesse reached over me in bed later that night and got a piece of paper off the nightstand. He turned on the lamp beside him.

"I think you will approve," he said, and gave me the paper.

It was a picture of a bedroom - with a king sized bed, flowers, a porch overlooking a beach, and a Jacuzzi tub.

"What is this?" I asked.

"This is where we are staying for our honeymoon."

I smiled at him. "Really?" I squeaked, and hugged him. "But where is it?"

He smiled. "It's a surprise, _querida_. For me to know and you to find out." He gave me one more kiss and turned off his lamp.

_L7L7L7L7_

_r&r please. . . _


	11. Chapter 11

The door bell rang. I finished filling the bowl of tortilla chips and went to open it, expecting another one of my mom's friends and/or co-workers.

Instead I opened it to Jesse.

"I thought you where working until seven," I said, and he shook his head. His coloring looked off. I reached out and grabbed his hand to pull him though the threshold. "You didn't have to ring the bell, you know. I mean, you're almost family."

"I know," he said quietly.

I stopped in the foyer, pulling him closer to me. He put his arms around my waist instinctively, and I took his bundled up swimsuit and shirt from him.

"Are you okay?" I asked, taking my hand and feeling his forehead. It was hot.

"I . . . I actually don't feel too well. That's why I left early."

"Oh. Do you want to go home?"

He shook his head. "I'm fine. I just needed to sit down a while."

I walked into the bathroom and locked the door behind us. "What hurts?"

He looked at me like he was going to ask me to walk out, but just sighed and took off his scrubs. "My stomach for the most part. Well, not a stomachache." He took my hand and put it on the lower part of his stomach, just above his boxers. "Right here. Like . . . like a toothache or something."

"Jesse," I said, grabbing both of his shoulders. He looked at me with surprise. "Maybe you're pregnant."

He sighed and rolled his eyes, pulling on his swim trunks. "Maybe it's just indigestion," he mumbled. "I had Mexican for lunch."

"Jesse, you eat Mexican, like, three times a week."

He shrugged and gave me his dirty clothes, then pulled a gray t-shirt over his head. "Maybe I just got something bad."

"Maybe," I said. I wasn't too convinced.

He put his arm around me and kissed me hard on the mouth. "Let's just enjoy the party, though. We can worry about me later." He unlocked the door.

I rolled my eyes. "Sure Jesse. Tell me you're having stomach pains and then tell me not to worry."

He kissed me again, this time pushing me up against the sink, as if to say, Forget it, okay? Worry about my tongue in your mouth instead.

I felt a rush of cold air to my right and turned - to see my little (step) brother David, his eyes wide in horror.

Well, he wasn't so little anymore. He was almost twenty-one.

Jesse pulled away and, clearing his throat, grabbed his clothes from me and mumbled something about putting them in the car.

"Thanks," I hissed when he edged away. I smiled at my brother. "Sorry. I mean, we weren't doing anything. Just . . . kiss - "

"You don't have to explain," David said, putting up both hands.

I looked him over. He had grown since thirteen - to a decent height of six feet, actually. He was still scrawny, and a little nerdy. But a cute nerdy, you know?

I felt bad for him, though. He had no luck with girls - even if he was the next Bill Gates. Even a Steve Jobs.

Well, I take that back. Steve Jobs was a little cuter in his day than Bill Gates.

But you get my drift.

I sent him one more smile and wiggled out of there. Talk about awkward.

Jesse was eating some of the chips I had poured into the bowl when I walked into the kitchen. I took it from him.

"I thought your stomach was hurting."

He shrugged and followed me onto the deck. "It comes and goes."

My mom had bought two sets of tables and chairs and even a mini-bar to go on the new deck. She was behind the bar now, trying to show Andy how to work the new blender.

She waved when she saw me, even though I had been here all afternoon. To the friends close to her she said, "That's him! Isn't he good looking?"

Oh God, I thought, bringing the chips over to one of the tables. She actually said _good looking. _

My mom practically danced over and, grabbing my hand, said, "Why don't you introduce Jesse?"

The crowd of twenty-or-so party goers crowded around. "Um, this is Jesse. My fiancé," I said lamely.

Jesse smiled to everyone and said hello. I could tell he was as awkward feeling as I was.

The people drifted away, and I hissed under my breath to my mom, "Did you really have to do that?"

"Oh, honey," she said, fixing a strayed place setting on the table. I looked over to see a bored Jake manning the grill. Summer was laying in the grass beside him, catching the last of the sun she could. "I talk about you two all the time. Everyone was dying to meet him. Did you get the ketchup?"

I sighed and pulled Jesse back into the house and yanked open the fridge.

"She is so embarrassing!" I said, handing Jesse a few bottles of condiments. I grabbed the rest and shut the door with my foot.

"Aw, Susannah," Jesse said. "Amuse her. She's going though a rough time, letting you go."

"What do you mean, letting me go?" I stopped at the sliding glass door.

Jesse shrugged, almost losing the jar of relish. "Well, you moved out, you're getting married. Starting your own family. She's missing you."

I rolled my eyes and walked over the threshold of the already opened door. "My mom's fine. I'm twenty-three. She's had plenty of time to adjust."

"That's just my assessment, _querida_. Believe what you want."

I almost got mad at him, but I looked at my mom instead. She looked so goofy in her see-through cover-up and her four-inch foam sandals.

I wondered if Jesse was right. Was she missing me? Is that why she had asked me to come over early and help with decorations?

We sat the condiments down and Jesse collapsed in one of the new chairs.

"It's hot," he complained. I reached over and felt his forehead.

"_You're_ hot. Do you want a Tylenol?"

He shook his head like it was a ridiculous idea that he was sick. "I'm fine. Never been sick a day in my life. My two lives."

"Except for . . . "

He sighed. "Except for when you gave me mono. How could I forget that?"

"I'm sorry," I said with a smile. He smiled back and squeezed my hand. "You promise you feel okay, though?"

He kissed my hand. "Swear it."

Andy brought the burgers over to the table on a big plate. Jesse made a face at them.

"Something wrong?" my stepfather asked.

"Jesse just has a stomachache. He's fine."

Jesse sent Andy a smile of confidence.

"Do you want an antacid or something?" Andy asked.

"Jesse thinks he's above medicine," I said before he could answer.

"Thanks, Susannah," he mumbled, then got a burger off the plate and said, "But I feel fine."

"Okay," Andy and I said at the same time.

People started milling over and fixing their burgers, complimenting my ring or Jesse's finishing medical school or something else totally random while they waited. We were like a sideshow.

Finally they all went to sit other places, leaving me and Jesse and a few remaining burgers. I noticed Jake and Summer had slipped out. Brad had never showed up.

Strange, since he lives here.

I watched Jesse pick at his burger.

"If you're just eating that for my benefit, you can stop," I told him.

He gave me one of his looks, but put the burger aside.

"Maybe you picked something up at the hospital."

He leaned back in his chair, stretching, pulling his shirt up enough to see his happy trail. (And what a happy trail it was!) "Maybe," he mumbled.

I put down my own burger. Well, okay, my empty plate. I know, I'm a beast-woman. "Do you want to go sit inside?"

He shook his head. "I'm fine, _querida_. Just . . . a little tired."

He looked more than a little tired. He looked, well, sick.

My mom called me to come over and meet a friend of hers that had arrived late. Jesse stood up too. He wobbled a little, from vertigo, I guess, and came with me.

"I would like you to meet Wendy Sinclair. She is going to be my new co-anchor in the mornings. She came all the way from Baltimore!"

Baltimore? They must have fired her. "Nice to meet you," I said, extending a hand.

"Likewise!" she said. She smiled at Jesse. "Nice to meet you too . . . "

"Jesse," he said, extending a hand. "Jesse de Silva."

"This is Suze's fiancé," my mom cooed happily.

"You don't say! When is the wedding?" She looked back at me.

"June," I replied. I hate small talk.

"Wonderful! You have a very handsome future husband! De Silva, you said? Is that Latino?"

"Spanish," we both said.

"Do you speak the language, then?" Wendy asked. "Spanish, I mean?"

"Yes. Well, Spain Spanish is a little different from South American Spanish. But yes, I do speak it."

"Well say something!" Wendy said.

I glared at my mother, who rolled her eyes at me and mouthed, Have a little fun.

"Say . . . say something to her," she nodded to me. (Um, hello? Wendy? I have a name. It's Suze.)

Jesse thought for a minute. Then he said, "_Deseo ir a casa_."

I knew enough Spanish by now to know he said something about home.

"_No me siento bien_," he added.

"Wonderful," Wendy said. To my relief Andy brought over another round of pinta coladas.

I told my mom Jesse wasn't felling to good, and she waved me away.

"Oh, go on. I know you don't want to spend your evening here."

That was good enough for me. I grabbed Jesse's hand and hauled butt to the car.

"What did you say?" I asked when he pulled out of the driveway. (My mom had picked me up earlier so we wouldn't have to drive home in separate cars.)

"Earlier? 'I want to go home' and 'I don't feel so well'."

"Do you want me to drive?" I offered.

"No no, Susannah. I feel fine now."

"Okay," I said, skeptical.

We made the fifteen minute trip in ten, and Jesse was quick to get to the shower.

I went to get something out of the bedroom a few minutes later and heard him moaning behind the closed door. I ran to open it and saw him leaning over the sink, his hand clutching his stomach.

"Jesse!" I yelled, coming up to him and wrapping my arms around him. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, but it was forced. "Just . . . just help me into bed, please."

He had managed to put on a pair of boxers after his shower, but he was still wet and shaking. I turned off the fan and got some extra blankets from the closet.

"I'm okay, Susannah," he promised. He kept his eyes closed in pain.

"You are not, Jesse! You're sick!" I sighed and, getting two Tylenol's, mumbled, "You must have picked up a bug."

"I did _not_," he whispered. I helped him sit up to take the pills, and when he was done he collapsed onto the bed again.

"Sure," I told him. The phone rang in the other room - it was an unfamiliar area code. But I answered anyways, coming back to sit on the bed with Jesse (who, in an attempt to look well, had picked up and book and started to read).

"Hello?" I answered wearily, afraid it was a telemarketer. It wasn't.

"SUZE! I'm moving back!"

I looked at the number again, still on the phone's display, and said, "That's great. Who are you?"

"It's Cee Cee, Suze!"

"Oh," I said with a laugh, then, "OHHH! Oh my God when are you moving? Will you be back for the wedding?"

Jesse peeked at me curiously over his book.

"I'll be back in April. But you haven't heard the best part - I'm going to be editor at _The Carmel Register_!"

Thankfully they had changed the name of the _Carmel Pine Cone_ a few years ago, trying to be a more "serious newspaper".

"Seriously?" I asked. Jesse had put his book away and was now fully listening to me, trying to keep the pained look off his face. I mouthed if he was okay, he just waved it away.

"Seriously! And you're going to be my first special!"

"Excuse me?"

She laughed. "Well, I want to do a special on weddings in Carmel, because it seems to be becoming a trend. And since you're getting married . . ."

"Wow," I said. "That's great."

"You want be the only ones, though. Don't worry."

Oh yeah. Don't worry. "Well, that's great Cee Cee. I've got to go though. Jesse's sick and he looks like he might lose it in a minute."

"Oh okay! Tell him to feel better! Bye!"

"Bye," said, and hung up the phone. Then I looked at Jesse.

"I'm not 'about to lose it', Susannah."

"I know," I said. "I needed an excuse." I put my head in his lap and sighed, long and hard.

"What is it?" he asked, stroking my hair.

"Just . . . well, I already have enough stress with the wedding and school . . . now we're going to be in the Carmel paper too."

Jesse laughed. "So Cee Cee's moving back?"

"Yeah," I mumbled. "And she's doing a story on weddings in Carmel . . . and guess who's going to be the headliners?"

"Hmm . . . us?"

I nodded.

"How wonderful," he whispered. I felt him go a little rigid and looked up at his face.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine," he said, forcing a smile. "I'm tired though."

I sat up and kissed him. "Do you want me to make you a doctor's appointment?"

"NO," he said harshly. "I'm fine, Susannah. I promise."

L7L7L7L7

The next afternoon my phone rang in class. Everyone, including the professor, turned to look at me.

I started, paused, then reached for it. It was Jesse.

"I'm sorry," I said hastily to the professor, and ran out into the hall to answer it.

"Jesse?" I asked.

"I'm okay, Susannah," he said, reading my next question. "Well . . . by okay I mean . . . well, I'm feeling a little sick, and I was wondering if you could come pick me up from work."

"A little sick and you can't drive?"

He sighed. "I'm sorry to bother you, _querida_. I know you have class."

I thought about the lecture I was missing and smiled. "I'll be there in twenty minutes."

I ran back into the class and got my books, then went back out the door, tell the prof I had a family emergency.

Jesse was waiting for me outside the doors of the emergency room. I almost toted him back in there when I saw his face.

He hurried to open the door and sit down. He shivered, despite the wonderful seventy-degree late February afternoon.

He didn't say a word when I turned left at the stop sign, driving back towards the professional building and away from the highway.

He caught on when I pulled into the shade of the parking deck.

"Hey!" he said, his voice not very strong. "Where are you going?"

"To the doctor."

He glared at me. I glared back. He let out a deep sigh and said, "I'm going to have to wear my scrubs, too."

I reached into the back seat and handed him a t shirt and gym shorts I had swung by the house to pick up.

"The windows are tinted. You can change."

He gave me a hard look, but changed anyways while I searched for a parking place.

Once I was parked and he was decent, we got on the elevator and stood in silence until we reached the fifth floor. I knew he was pissed, but I didn't care. He was going to get himself killed. Again.

The doctor saw us immediately (something to do with fact that Jesse was now a part of the whole brotherhood of doctors, I guess). Jesse was weighed (he had lost three pounds, which I was sure had to do with his being sick) and measured (he had grown a fourth of an inch . . . again), then the doctor came in and examined him.

I was asked to step out, which I was about to do, but Jesse grabbed my hand and said, "Can she please stay?"

The doctor sighed. "Well, I guess she has seen it all before," he said with a joking smile.

I faked a laugh and Jesse got a little red, but said nothing.

The doctor lifted Jesse's shirt to feel the area he complained about.

"I feel a little tightness," he said. "It's probably your appendix."

"Great," Jesse mumbled.

The doctor smiled. "We'll just do an ultrasound to confirm. I'll send a nurse in."

Jesse sighed when the doctor left. "Great," he said again.

I leaned over him and played with his hair. "Be glad it isn't something else."

"I guess," he mumbled.

I played with his hair some more. "So can it be a girl?"

"Excuse me?"

I shrugged. "Well, you get sick, you're getting an ultrasound. I think it should at least have a sex."

He sighed again. "Shut up, Susannah. You're not making me feel any better."

I laughed and stood up when the nurse came in, bring a cart with her. The ultrasound confirmed it - it was the appendix.

We had to go meet the surgeon tomorrow, then it would be taken out Wednesday.

"Look at the bright side," I told him as I backed the car out of the parking spot. "We have a reason to miss marriage class Thursday."

"Ha ha," he said, unenthused.

_L7L7L7L7_

I was happy to get Jesse to the surgeon the next day. It gave him someone else to complain too.

I'm sorry. That's a bit mean. He was _very_ sick.

But love only goes so far in the form of tolerance.

The surgeon took a few x-rays and another ultrasound, then set us down in his office and explained the procedure.

It seemed easy - it would all be done with lasers, and be minimal invasive. We would check-in at six in the morning and Jesse would be home by noon.

"That should solve everything," the surgeon said with a smile.

Jesse didn't sleep at all that night. I couldn't much blame him . . . I was as nervous as he was.

The alarm went off as soon as I had fallen asleep. Jesse had already taken a shower and was in the living room. I pulled on some sweats and went to put my head on his shoulder.

"You know you'll be okay," I said.

"I know," he mumbled. He didn't seem too convinced.

They had him take off all his clothes and put on one of those gowns when we got there. I tried to keep a strait face.

He mumbled something unpleasant to me in Spanish.

"Come on, Jesse. Lighten up."

The nurse came in and checked all his vitals, then they had him lay down on a bed and hooked a few IVs up.

"Now," the nurse said. "You just relax, Mr. de Silva, and in no time you'll be asleep. Okay?"

He nodded, his eyelids already dropping.

I pulled up a chair beside him and ran my fingers though his hair.

"Sleepy?" I asked.

I fought his closing eyelids. "If I don't make it out alive, please don't marry Slater."

The tiny smile told me he was kidding, but the line of worry across his forehead told me he was scared.

"Jesse," I said, exasperated. "You're going to make it out alive." I kissed his cheek. "Beside," I whispered in his ear, "after sleeping with you, I don't think I could stand to see Paul's puny little body on our wedding night."

Jesse smiled, his eyes closed. He fought them open. "Will you take me to get lunch after we leave?"

It was a drugged question, but I knew it made him feel better to make plans for later - it gave him some reassurance.

"Of course. Were do you want to go?"

"I think I want ice cream," he mumbled, eyes closing again.

"A McFlurry, maybe? Or what about one of those shakes for Chick-fil-a - I hear they're to DIE for."

He squeezed my hand. "I love you," he whispered.

I kissed him forehead. "I love you too. Dream about our wedding, okay?"

He nodded, then drifted off.

The nurse came back in. "Did he go to sleep?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said, rubbing his cheek.

"It only takes about an hour," she told me with a helpful smile. "Do you want me to show you to the waiting room?"

I sighed and, giving Jesse one last kiss on the forehead, followed her to a bright room with plenty of magazines, TVs, and vending machines.

I had just found a _Cosmo_ when my mom called. I remembered I had left her a message last night about Jesse.

"Why didn't you call me again?" she said when I answered.

I sighed. "It okay, Mom. Really."

"Where are you now?" she demanded.

"I'm waiting for him to get out of surgery."

Her tone went sweet. "Do you want me to come sit with you, Susie? I'm off today, and I didn't have any plans."

"No, mom. It's okay. He'll be out in like thirty minutes."

"I know this is hard for you," she went on. "I mean, Jesse is perfectly healthy. Do they know what brought it on?"

I picked up my _Cosmo_ again. "It's just one of those things, Mom."

"How long will he be out of work?"

"He's going back Monday. Have you talked to the wedding planner?" I asked, hoping to get her off subject.

"Oh, Susie, I keep forgetting to tell you we're supposed to meet with her Friday to look at some color themes. And she keeps nagging me about your dress - when do you plan to start looking?"

As soon as I can fit my fat ass into a four. "When I go to New York, Mom. I told you that."

"So you expect to find your wedding dress in five days?"

"Mm-hum."

She sighed. "That's a little unrealistic, Suze."

"Mom, I know what I'm doing, okay? I promise."

She sighed again. "That's the station calling. We're meeting with Barbie at noon at that Bridge Cafe place, okay?"

"Okay, Mom. I love you. Go answer the phone."

"I love you too, honey."

The line went dead, and I looked at the clock. Twenty more minutes.

It was too nerve-racking to sit here staring at the clock. I picked up my phone again and called Gina.

"Hey!" she answered. "What's up?"

"Jesse had to have his appendix taken out and he's in surgery and I have to talk to someone."

"Appendix? Ouch. Is he going to be okay?"

"Yeah," I said, thumbing though the Cosmo again. I wanted no blank space for thought in my brain. "He is."

"Good. So how is the wedding planning going?"

"Great, I guess. I pick my color themes Friday."

"That sounds like fun."

"More than you can imagine."

"So I've been wondering . . . how's Jake?"

I lost my place on the _Cosmo_ page. Gina had no idea Jake was getting married. I think, in fact, she still had a think for him. "Why?"

"Well, Keith broke up with me - "

"Gina!"

"Oh, God," she said. "He was a total loser. It was so coming. But I thought, you know, maybe Jake and I could go to the wedding together."

I bit my lip before saying, kind of quietly, "Jake's engaged to Summer now."

"SUMMER? That druggie girl?"

I remember when I had first told Gina about Summer - I had thought she was a totally pot head. Come to find out, that was just the way she talked.

"Well, Summer doesn't do drugs, actually. In fact she's pretty cool. She's, um, going to be one of my bridesmaids."

Gina groaned, long and loud. I really felt bad for her. She hadn't been in a good relationship in years.

"I'm sorry, Gina. I . . . I didn't know you still liked him. I mean, I can totally find someone else to set you up with . . ."

"No," she said. "But when you come here we are defiantly going man hunting."

"I promise to find you the sexist one in the city!"

She laughed. "I've already tried. I've got to go - the boss is giving me a really dirty look right now."

She hung up without saying goodbye, and I put my phone away. Fifteen more minutes . . .

I read every article in _Cosmo_, then tore out a few and read them again. I watched the cars outside the window, counted the Butterfingers in the candy machine, and drank two Diet Cokes.

I was about to go for the third when the doctor came out, and, smiling at me, came over.

"Everything went fine," he said with a smile. I collapsed against the back of my chair. "He's in recovery, if you want to see him."

I was out of the plastic chair like a shoot. A helpful nurse at the nurse's station pointed to his room.

He looked the same he had an hour ago - still asleep, still Jesse. I pulled up the chair beside him and held the hand that was IV-free.

He squeezed my hand back, then opened his eyes and gave me a little smile. "_Querida_," he said.

God, this seems familiar.

"Hey, baby. Everything went good."

He frowned. "I don't feel too well, Susannah."

"What?"

"I think . . . I'm going to be sick."

"Oh," I said, then sprung to my feet and caught the nurse just in time.

"It's just the anesthesia," the nurse said after Jesse was done puking. He leaned back and groaned.

"So it's normal?"

She nodded. "Completely. We'll give him something to settle his stomach."

After she left I asked him if he still wanted that McFlurry.

"Susannah? Shut it, alright?"

I laughed. "You sound more and more like me every day."

L7L7L7L7

I had just got Jesse settled in our bed with a three-day supply of books, _Men's Health_'s, and the remote when Josafina showed up.

Luckily, I was in the kitchen pouring myself a late-afternoon bowl of Fruit-Loops, so she didn't disturb him.

"How is he?" she asked anxiously.

"Fine," I said, scooping a mouthful of colorful high-furtouse deliciousness into my mouth.

She let out a sigh of relief. "Good. Is he sleeping?"

"Nope," I said, glad to have a reason to get rid of her. "He'd probably like some company, in fact. Go on in."

She disappeared into the bedroom.

I went and lounged on the couch, halfway listening to _Extra_, halfway concentrating on eating.

The doorbell rang. I sighed and went to answer it.

Kristen stood behind the closed door, her arms full of Chinese carry-out.

"Ben and I thought we should bring you some dinner - he would have come, but he's working a double."

"Oh," I said, a little surprised. "Thanks. Come on in."

I helped her carry the bags over to the kitchen counter, then said, "Just let me check on him real quick."

"Okay," Kris said with a smile.

When I opened the bedroom door Jesse stopped talking to his sister, who was leaning against the bed.

"Kristen's here," I hissed. "So keep it down, okay?"

He nodded, then asked, all pitiful, if he could have a Coke.

I went and poured him one, then went back in the bedroom, apologizing to Kristen on the way. I saw Josafina had disappeared.

"She thought I should get some rest," he explained.

I handed him his Coke and kissed his nose. "You probably should."

"Go visit," he said, and shooed me away.

"So," Kristen said as I put the Chinese in the fridge for later. "Do you like my shirt?"

She extended her arm in my direction. It looked like any old long-sleeve t-shirt . . .

That's when I noticed the gold bracelet around her wrist.

"Where did you get that?" I asked, feeling the cool, silk-like gold between my fingers.

"Ben!" she said.

"WHY?"

"He said, 'Just because I love you'."

"He said he loves you!?" I squealed. She nodded. We squealed together.

"So that's why I signed us both up for the Buff Brides Kickboxing class at the Y."

"YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED?"

"Well, no. I mean, he didn't ask. But I might as well get a head start, right? Besides, I can be a buff bridesmaid."

"Please tell me it's on Thursdays at seven."

She laughed. "Actually Mondays at six. Why?"

I rolled my eyes. "We have to take stupid marriage classes."

Kristen laughed. "Well, my mom made me got to family counseling every week when I was a teenager. It couldn't be much worse."

"I guess," I said. "I'm just glad I have the excuse of Jesse to miss tomorrow."

"How's he feeling?" she asked.

"Fine. He just--" the doorbell rang again, cutting me off. "Sorry," I said, and went to answer it.

I was surprised to open it to none other than Father D.

"Um, I was going to call I swear--"

"Susannah, don't make up excuses. You should have called three days ago."

I bit my lip. Kristen came up beside me. "Well," she said with a smile. "Gotta go to a spin class. Call me later, Suze!"

She was out of the door like a shot.

"I, um. I'm sorry."

He waved it away. "Where is Jesse? Is he alright?"

"Yeah," I said, letting Father Dom in. "He's in the bedroom. Want to see him?"

Without waiting for a reply, I lead Father D. to our bedroom. Jesse was awake and reading a _Men Health_ - I was a little embarrassed to see the words _MAKE HER GO SEX CRAZY_ on the cover.

He put the magazine away, making sure it was face-down.

"Hello, Father Dominic," he said.

I suddenly felt a little awkward - here we were, Jesse, me, and Father D., in Jesse and I's bedroom, where, five nights out of seven, we had passionate, steamy sex.

Passionate, steamy pre-maritial sex.

"Um," I said. "I think I'm going to go heat up the Chinese. Do you like sweet and sour chicken, Father D.?"

"You don't have to make dinner for me, Susannah," he said.

"Oh, it's no biggie. It's take out." I flew from the room and to the kitchen, tripping over Spike in the process.

Jesse and Father D. talked for a few more minutes, then I heard Jesse's voice, a little weakly, calling me from the bedroom.

I put the rice in the microwave and ran to the bedroom.

"Jesse has something to tell you, Susannah," Father Dom said when I enter the room.

I looked over at my gloom fiance, who's eyes were on me. He patted the bed beside him.

I went and sat down. He took my hand. "I . . . I didn't want to tell you, Susannah, because I thought you would worry."

I turned to see Father D. had left, shutting the door behind him.

"Tell me what, Jesse? Are you okay?" I was getting hysterical, I knew.

I played with my hand, his eyes not meeting mine. "The . . . the infection in my appendix had already spread to--"

"JESSE! ARE YOU DYING?"

"No, Susannah. The infection spread, but the doctor caught it in time. I would have told you, but I didn't want you to worry."

I put my head on his shoulder, flabbergasted. It was more serious than I had thought?

"But I want to say thank-you, too, _querida_. If it wasn't for your forcing me to the doctor, I might not have . . . lived."

I looked up at him. "What?"

"If I had waited two more days the infection would have spread to my entire intestine and parts of my stomach. I would be dead. _Again_."

I wrapped my arms around him.

"You just keep saving me, don't you, Susannah?" he asked with a laugh.

I hugged him tighter than I ever had.


	12. Chapter 12

PROLOGUE

I tried my hardest to get out of that meeting. Tried my _damn_ hardest.

But, in the end, Jesse assured me he was well enough to go. And he promised me those Steve Madden pumps I'd been drooling over for the last two weeks.

We got there right on time (despite my pretending not to know where I was going and driving around the parking lot a few times).

"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked when we got to the door in the new wing of the church that had a big sign that said MARRIAGE CLASSES on it. "No sudden headache? Fever? Upset stomach?"

"No, Susannah," Jesse said with a smile, turning the door knob.

I put my hand over his, stopping him. "You want to go make it in the car? Because I'm totally in the mood, and everything."

He gave me one of those exasperated looks. "I haven't been released yet, remember?"

"We'll go really slow," I said hastily.

He opened the door and pushed me in.

Well, maybe we were a little late.

The woman standing at the front of the room smiled at us. "I was told you couldn't make it tonight."

I smiled and shrugged.

"Have a seat!" she said, her mood drastically changing. "We're just getting started."

Jesse and I took the empty seats by the window.

"Why don't you two introduce yourselves to the class?"

I flushed a little. It was hot in here.

I looked around at the four other couples, their eyes glued to me.

Well, okay, all the girl's eyes were on Jesse. But still.

"I'm Suze, and this is Jesse."

"Last names?" the instructor prompted.

"Um, Simon and de Silva. Soon to both be de Silva, I guess."

"And what do you do for a living?" She directed the question towards Jesse, who cleared his throat nervously.

"I'm a resident doctor at Carmel Hospital. And Susannah is about to finish nursing school."

The instructor clapped her hands together, stirring some surprised mummers from the group.

"A doctor and a nurse! How cute! How long have you been dating?" From the look she gave Jesse, it seemed like she wanted the answer to be_ not long_.

Which was totally wrong. She was like in her forties.

"Eight years," I said loudly.

"_Eight_? Wow. Consecutively?"

"Yeah," I said, a little harshly.

Jesse leaned over to whisper "Remember the shoes you wanted?" in my ear when no one was looking.

I sighed and tried to relax a little. He gave me a smile at my effort.

"For those of you who I didn't get to meet earlier, I'm Catherine, and I'll be your instructor these eight weeks. I have a PhD in psychology, and a Masters in family and marriage counseling. I currently and working in a private practice right up the road in Blue Beach."

She was also currently, I noticed, not wearing a wedding ring.

"So I thought that tonight we would just try to really get to know each other and discuss some stuff. Now, everything that happens in this room stays in this room." She laughed at her little pop culture joke. "So no holding back, okay? And hopefully, by the time we go to our retreat, we will be better couples all around."

"Excuse me," I said, getting Catherine's attention. "Retreat?"

She smiled. "Did you not get the informational packet about the classes with your payments?"

Payments? I shook my head.

"For the weekend of our last class we are going to a retreat camp on the Buckhead River. It's a beautiful place," she assured the class, then starting going on about the wonderful seminars they would be having there.

"We had to pay for this crap?" I whispered to Jesse.

"I think Father Dominic took care of that, Susannah."

Ohhh. Sneaky old man.

"Did you know about this retreat thing?"

He shook his head, trying his hardest to listen.

"Because I could so fake the flu and get out of it. I mean, you're a doctor. They would so believe us."

"We'll talk about it later, alright?"

I was quiet a second longer, then said, "I mean, don't you think they'll be shoving enough of this garbage down our throats for six weeks? Besides, we'll probably be sleeping in bunk beds or something. I mean, ser--"

"Miss Simon," Catherine called form her little podium beside me. I looked up, guilty, into her icy blue eyes. "Something you would like to share?"

"Nope," I said with a smile.

L7L7L7L7

APRIL

Spring was well welcomed at the soon-to-be de Silva household. But instead of Spring Cleaning the first Saturday in April, I Spring Tanned.

"Susannah," Jesse said when I came in for some lunch. He had been working on revitalizing the front yard the whole morning.

And I must say, he was doing a pretty good job. It looked like Disneyland out there.

"Yes, dear? Can I make you a sandwich?" I batted my eyelashes at him.

He sighed. "It's the first day of spring. Shouldn't you be cleaning like, well, a normal woman?"

I laughed, getting out the cold cuts. "Jesse, after eight years you should know - I'm not a normal woman. Besides, I don't want to spend a wonderful day like this cooped up inside. I'm working on my wedding tan!"

He laughed. "You're tan enough."

"Not compared to you." I held up my wrist to his. "See? And you don't even try."

He sighed, taking a look around. I looked too. I mean, it seemed clean enough. I had vacuumed last week, as well as washed our bed sheets.

"If you want it clean so bad, why don't you do it?" I asked, putting mustard on both his and my sandwiches.

He laughed again. "Because, Susannah."

I gave him a meaningful look. "Because why?"

He shrugged. "Just . . . Do you want to come the sprinkler system? I finally to it to work."

I rolled my eyes - sly trick - and handed him his sandwich.

I hit his chest (which was kind of dirty from his yard work) and said, "I almost forgot! We're crashing a wedding tonight!"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, Barbie wants us to go to some of her client's weddings to, you know, get the drift. This one's on the golf course at Pebble Beach."

He chewed thoughtfully. "Won't they notice we aren't part of the wedding party?"

I shook my head. "Barbie said there was going to be at least a hundred people there." I reached out to rub his arm. "C'mon. It'll be fun."

He didn't look that excited.

"Okay," I said, pushing him up against the counter. "How about, if you go I'll make it worth your while. Totally."

He smirked at me. "How?"

I gave him my sexiest smile. "Do I really have to answer that?"

He smiled at me. "You can just show me, I guess."

L7L7L7L7

There was no way we could have been spotted in that wedding. We got there at five sharp - when the wedding started - and had to stand on the back part of the green they were getting married on.

But I did get to see the bride, from a distance.

I loved everything about the way she had been dressed - her make-up, dark on the eyes and natural on the face. Her dress, white satin with pearl-looking beads sewn in. Her hair, blonde and wavy, down around her shoulders and pulled away from her face in the front.

I grabbed Jesse's hand when she went by - he seemed a little bored.

"Okay," I whispered to him as a hundred cameras went off around us. "Tell me this doesn't make you want to get married tomorrow?"

He rolled his eyes, then squinted ahead at the retreating form of the bride. "We can't even see the actual ceremony from here."

"And . . ."

"And maybe we could go to dinner instead? I'm starving."

"They'll have food at the reception, Jesse. Duh."

He looked at me. "Reception? I thought we were leaving after this."

I laughed. "Why would we leave after this? We've GOT to stay for the reception."

And so we did. It was pretty easy, sneaking around, smiling at people I had never seen before, oohing and ahhing over the bride with bystanders.

Too much for Jesse though, I was afraid. "I'm going to find the restroom," he announced.

"Be my guest," I told him with a smile.

I walked around the ball room the reception was being held at and stopped at the drapes, which had been pulled closed on the window I was standing at.

Suddenly, though, a hand shot though the drape and grabbed my arm, pulling me though the floor-to-ceiling open door and into the chilly early spring evening.

I snapped my head up in the direction of said arm and was ready to employ some Butt-Of-Steel kickboxing moves when I noticed the arm belong to no other than Paul Slater.

"Paul?" I said, shocked. "Why are _you_ here?"

"I could ask you the same question," he said, eyebrow raised over strikingly blue eye.

I took my hand back and crossed my arms defensively. "We were _invited_, thank you."

"Really? Who's party do you belong to?"

I started, then paused and said, "The wedding planner's party. She's planning our wedding, too."

I took note of his expression at the words_ our wedding_. It wasn't too happy.

"Wait," I said before he could make another smart comment. "Why are _you_ here?"

He smiled smugly. "I negotiated the lovely couple's prenup."

"Prenup? Do they think they're not going to last, or something?"

He shrugged. "It's just a wise thing to do this day in age. Make sure your assets are taken care of. I could negotiate your own, if you would-"

"Paul," I sighed, exasperated. "There would be no need to spend the money. Jesse and I _won't_ get a divorce."

He rolled his eyes. "Well, either way, I'm glad you're here. I need to talk with you about - "

"Your invitation? Paul, I told you you could come. The invitations go out next week - "

"No, no, no," he said, shaking his head. "Suze, I know about your little problem."

How could he possibly know I had started my period today (_after_ Jesse and I made it in the shower, thank God)? Was he stalking me?

Paul sighed, seeing my puzzled expression. "I know about Lea."

"LEA? I haven't seen her in weeks! Is she bothering you now?"

"Not . . . bothering. More like . . . threatening."

"Threatening? Why would she threaten you?"

"Well, not me, _par se_."

I stared at him, still not catching on.

"She's threading to kill you, actually."

Jesse came though the drapes at that exact moment. He looked around to get his bearings and, noting Paul, put his arm around me.

"What are you doing here?" he asked defensively, accent spiking at his tension.

"Long story," Paul summed.

"Kill ME? Why? What did I ever do to her?"

Jesse's eyes locked on my face. "Who wants to kill you?"

He seemed pretty calm about it. I mean, he had been dealing with this stuff for eight years. Why shouldn't he be?

"Lea," I answered him quietly.

Jesse swung to face Paul. "What have you been doing, Slater? Huh? What trouble have you stirred up this time?"

Paul looked angrily at Jesse. "Hey," he said defensively. "I might have saved her, for all you know."

"Paul," I groaned, freeing myself of Jesse's death grip. "Please explain."

"Well," Paul started, a little smug, "she came to me about two weeks ago. Somehow she knows that I know you . . . she wouldn't answer when I asked her how. But she told me that if you didn't keep someone away from someone . . . Dan, I think - "

"Ben," Jesse and I both corrected.

He shrugged. "Same difference. But she said that if you didn't keep away whoever from _Ben_, then she would off you." He shrugged. "And that's all. Haven't seen her since."

"When was this?" I asked, chills raising on my arms. Jesse wrapped his own back around me.

"Two weeks ago. I've been calling . . . "

"On my cell?"

He shook his head. "I don't have your cell number. I've been calling your house phone."

I gave Jesse a side glance. "Oh really?"

He wasn't paying attention. "How would she know that you know Susannah?"

Paul shrugged. "Good intuition?"

Jesse shook his head. "I think it's something more, Slater."

Paul raised an eyebrow and moved a little closer. "God, Jesse, you are so - "

"OKAY!" I yelled, and all the testosterone in the air disappeared. "Enough, you two. Jesse, Paul isn't trying to kill me. Please. And Paul, something _doesn't_ sound right . . . are you sure you didn't notice anything else?"

He though for a minute. "Well, she did say something about a wedding . . . but I didn't hear her all the way. She was totally hysterical."

Of course. It was the whole I'm-jealous-you're-getting-married thing.

I sighed when I noticed Jesse and Paul staring each other down again.

"Come on, Jesse," I said, taking his hand. "I think we should go home."

"So early?" Paul asked.

I rolled my eyes. "I have a lot of thinking to do. Call me if you notice anything else. I promise - " I threw a look at Jesse, who looked down, embarrassed - "to answer this time."

L7L7L7L7L7

That night I couldn't sleep. I laid in bed, my head spinning through all the reasons, the possible answers.

Jesse slept soundly beside me. I put my head on his chest and listened to the sound of his heart. That helped.

Suddenly it hit me. I got out of bed and went to the middle room, where we kept our junk.

And, as soon as I turned on the light, I saw it. My yearbook from senior year - open to the S page.

I sighed and, bringing the book with me, went back to bed. It was easier to fall asleep this time.

L7L7L7L7L7

On Thursday Jesse and I met Barbie at the Carmel Florists and Botanical Gardens to pick our flowers.

Jesse, who had taken a day off to work on his own flowers, was less than enthused as we sat at one of the many tables at the restaurant that overlooked the gardens.

Thankfully, Barbie was running late, and my mom wouldn't be here for another hour.

"Jesse," I said, and he turned his pout from the view to me. "Enjoy yourself." When that didn't help I whispered, "I love you," across the table.

He sighed loudly. "I love you too," he said.

I pulled off my black pump and took my foot up his pants leg. "I can't wait to get home," I told him.

He sent me a little half smile. "Too bad we have marriage class tonight."

I dropped my leg. He reached under the table and put it back on his knee.

"But we could always run a little late, _querida_."

I raised an eyebrow and put my foot on his crouch. He sighed and leaned back in his chair, and I flexed my toes.

"Want to go to the car?" I asked.

He opened one eye to look at me, then pushed my foot off and sat up. "I would love to, but your mother is here."

I turned around to see the hostess point her our way, and, forcing a smile and a wave, mumbled, "Damn it."

"Barbie's not here yet?" she asked when she reached our table, then hugged both me and Jesse.

"Nope," I said, trying to keep the cheerfulness out of my voice. "She said she would be running late."

My mom sighed when we saw me get a piece of bread and smother it with butter. "Susie," she said.

"What?"

"What size are you in?"

I put down the bread shamefully. "A six."

"Let's keep it that way." She took my bread and ate it herself.

Jesse shot me a look, then his eyes wondered to above my head. I jumped when Barbie laid a manicured hand on my shoulder.

"I have a surprise for you!" she sung, and took the seat next to me. She handed me a plain envelope. "They came in early," she said with a smile.

I pulled out the wedding invitation, loving the way the black script looked so simple and elegant on the heavy pearl-colored paper.

I squealed, causing several tables to turned to look. But I didn't care.

"Mr. and Mrs. Andy Ackerman invites you to attend the marriage of their daughter, Miss Susannah Helen, to Mr. Jesse de Silva, Saturday, June third, two-thousand and eight at six o'clock on Pebble Beach. Reception immediately followineeeeh!"

I leaned over and hugged Jesse, who had scooted closer when my mom had come.

He read over it, hugging me close to his chest.

"They are all addressed and stamped," Barbie said, pulling out a stack of rubber-banded wedding invitations. "All you have to do is put them in the mail."

I took the bundle, which had to weigh a pound.

"How many people are we inviting again?" Jesse asked.

"I have eighty-three on the guest list," Barbie said before I could lie.

Jesse gave me a reproachful look.

"But . . . but some of them won't come, you know. Like, like . . . some of them."

"There's no need to worry," Barbie chimed in. "We have it all under cover. Now let's get some lunch so we can pick out some flowers!"

L7L7L7L7L7

We effectively lost my mom and Barbie in the roses and had hurried on to the hedge maze, where we got lost for a while too.

But Barbie, who must have had a tracker on me, found us making out in the shrubbery and tis-ticked until she got our attention.

"You two have a beautiful honeymoon in three months - can't you hold off?"

"Wait," I said, looking at Jesse. "She knows where we're going?"

Jesse shrugged. "She helped me book it."

I groaned and followed Barbie back to the flower shop.

"Is there any flower you like?" Barbie asked once we stepped inside the cool shop.

"I was thinking red roses and orchids." I sent Jesse a smile.

"That's . . . an unusual combination," she said.

The florist, and earthy-looking middle aged woman, pulled out some flowers and got to work.

"Orchids are kind of our thing," I told Barbie, who still looked skeptical.

My mom smiled. "I remember Jesse always used to bring you one when you went to dances in high school - it was so cute! And he brought them to you a graduation."

Jesse shrugged, embarrassed. "She likes them."

"I do like them," I said, putting my arm through his.

The florist finished her bouquet and held it out to me. It was beautiful.

"I want this," I said to Jesse.

Barbie sighed. "It really isn't a good beach-wedding bouquet, though. Maybe something a little more sandy would be nice."

I gave Barbie a look, and she shut up. "I like _this_," I said.

She gave me a hard look, but didn't say anything else.

L7L7L7L7

After marriage class, Jesse and I stopped by the post office and, one by one, put the invitations in the outgoing mail box.

I turned my closet upside down looking for a matching bra/undies set, but ended up just throwing on one of Jesse's old shirts and fluffing up my hair.

Jesse was waiting for me in bed, all his clothes but his jeans off. I easily took care of those.

I climbed on top of him and kissed him hard all over - his cheeks, his chest, his throat. He whispered little praises to me in Spanish.

He had locked lips with me long enough to flip us over, so he was on top. He pulled away and kissed my neck, and I looked up at our ceiling . . .

Then let out a scream that could have been heard in San Francisco.

"What?" Jesse yelled back, pulling away in case he had hurt me.

I pointed to the ceiling, watching his reaction as he read the words written in red.

DEAD BRIDE


	13. Chapter 13

THURSDAY

Catherine came around the group and handed out packets about the retreat. I pretended to throw up when she turned her back.

"Susannah," Jesse said, taking the packet away from me. He smiled and gave it back. "There's no need to worry," he whispered. "It's the weekend we will be in New York."

"You're shitting me!" I whispered back, and looked at the dates on the packet. He was right.

Catherine came to the front of the class and stood on her little podium. Then, with a blue marker, wrote on the dry-erase board behind her.

SEX

Catherine turned to smile at the group. "Now, I know it's a bit _taboo_, but it's something we need to talk about." A few couples laughed or mumbled around us. Jesse just looked mad. "In this class," Catherine continued, "we are going to be open and real about everything. So let's start over here."

To my relief, she turned to the couple opposite our end.

"Tell us," Catherine purred. "How often do you two have sex?"

The couple, about are age, both turned a little red.

The girl, I think her name was Haley, cleared her throat. "Maybe two or three times a week."

Catherine winced. "Only that? Engaged and newlywed couples should be having sex a lot more frequently. Maybe you two should step it up."

Haley stared at Catherine, red faced. Catherine just turned to the next couple.

Us.

Okay. Reverse order so wasn't fair.

"What about you two?" she purred.

I was about to tell her it wasn't any of her business, but, to my surprise, Jesse beat me to it.

"You know, Catherine, this is really a private subject you are bringing up."

"Aw, well, come on--"

"And I don't know about the rest of the couples in this class," Jesse continued. My heart swelled with pride, "but for Susannah and I, sex is a personal thing shared between only us. And I would like to keep it that way."

Catherine opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of water. She turned to me, hoping I had a different opinion.

And, while I talked to Gina about my sex life on the phone all the time, I so wasn't going there with this lady.

"I agree," I said with a smile. "I mean, I hardly know these people. I don't want them to know what goes on behind closed doors."

"Yeah," Haley said. "It isn't any of your business how many times a week we have sex. We're both really busy professionals, I'll have you know."

Catherine turned even redder. "But, if we don't share--"

"Well, I'm not sharing," I said and, slinging my new Coach purse over my shoulder, grabbed Jesse's hand and walked right out of Catherine's class.

Jesse, to my complete surprise, followed without hesitation.

L7L7L7L7

I woke up early to get ready. Reaching the bathroom I flicked on the lights, then jumped when I saw the mirror.

DEAD BRIDE

I sighed and, getting some Windex out, cleaned off the black eyeliner. I pulled out my make-up drawer and found my new Clinique eyeliner pencil down to the nub.

Jesse came in behind me and saw the remains of the message, as well as my poor eyeliner.

"She's not very original," I snapped. In the last week I had found the cryptic message spelled out with my Cheerios, in my book, with the milk I spilled and, oh, on my Anatomy final.

Jesse watched me scrub the rest of the letters off. "Why are you up?" he asked.

"Um, hello. Graduation."

He frowned. "Oh. What time do you have to be there?" He went to turn on the shower.

"Nine. They have to go over the whole thing two times. Amazing to think they're actually letting us _graduate_."

Jesse smiled. "Do you need a shower?"

I looked at him in the mirror and smiled back.

He left me, breathless, an hour later.

"_Don't be late_," I warned.

"Six sharp."

"Jesse," I groaned. "Five-thirty."

He stopped getting dressed and looked at me. "Five-thirty? Since when?"

"Since they set the thing up, Jesse. I swear if your late . . ."

He waved me off. "I won't be late." He kissed my forehead. "I love you, Susannah."

I watched him go and sighed. He was going to be _so_ late.

L7L7L7L7L7

We all took our seats at five. I turned in mine, searching for Jesse. I had already spotted my mom and Andy, but there was still no fiance in sight.

"He'll be here," Kristen assured me.

I bit my lip. "He's going to be late, though. I know it."

Kristen sighed. "Was he late to your high school graduation?"

I thought about it. "Yeah. Actually, he was."

Kristen frowned. "Well, I'm sure he'll be here. Look! They're starting!"

I checked periodically for my missing man, but could never see him. Even when I got on the podium and was handed my diploma.

I opened it up when I got back to my seat - just for curiosity's sake. There were those words again.

DEAD BRIDE

I touched the D with my finger, and saw that the red smudged off. Taking in a deep breath, I blew the message away like dust. My clean diploma was left.

Kristen hugged me when she sat back down beside me. "We did it!"

"Yeah," I said, as the head of the nursing department presented the class of 2008. "Now for the hard part - jobs."

"What do you have to worry?" she asked, throwing her hat up with the rest of the crowd. "You're getting married to a gorgeous doctor."

I caught what I hoped was my own hat. "Well things don't seem to be going too bad between you and Ben, either!"

She laughed. Ben came into view and, as soon as he reached her, wrapped his arms around Kristen.

"Have you seen Jesse?" I asked.

"Right behind you," I heard Jesse say. I whipped around and wrapped my arms around him.

"Fully dressed. On time. Showered." I kissed him. "You did good."

He smiled and handed me a bouquet of a dozen orchids. "You did better. I'm _so_ proud, _querida_."

My mom managed to get though the crowd, Andy in tow. He snapped a picture.

"You look so wonderful!" my mom said, hugging me.

"Mom," I said with a laugh. "This is my graduation. Not my wedding day."

"I know," she said, hugging me tighter. "But still."

She finally let me go and Jesse wrapped his arm back around me.

"Let's go to dinner!" my mom said. "Our treat."

I put on a fake smile. "Sure. Dinner sounds great."

We took separate cars, me riding with Jesse.

"So what are you going to do now?" he asked, watching me struggle to get my robe off from over my white dress.

"Find a job."

"When?"

I shrugged. "Monday, I guess."

He was quiet as he took a left hand turn. Then he sighed and said, "Please don't work in the emergency room."

I looked over at him. He pretended to concentrate on driving.

"Why not?"

"I just don't think you could handle it."

"Jesse, I can--"

"No," he interrupted. "You can't. I can barley, sometimes. I can't wait until I've finished my hours so I can leave."

I watched his face as he parallel parked in front of the restaurant - some fancy place where the prices were sure to be though the roof.

"Do you just not want me to work with you? Because I totally understand."

Finally meeting my gaze, he smiled. "Of course not, querida. I hope one day we can have a family practice together. I'll need someone to keep me organized." He reached out and tucked my hair behind my ear.

"So it's not about me?"

"Absolutely not. Feel free to apply, but I just don't think it's right for you."

A loud knock on my window made me jump. I looked over at Andy, leaning down to see inside the tinted windows.

"Come on, love birds!" he yelled. "We'll lose our reservations!"

"Reservations?" I asked, stepping out of the car. It had started to rain, and Andy gave me his umbrella.

"Yeah. And we're going to lose them."

Jesse ducked under the umbrella with me, and we walked up the inclined walkway to the front door. My mom was already inside, ready to hurry us to a table.

Once our meal was over (steak with twice baked potatoes, asparagus, spinach dip, and chocolate cake) a few people started making there way to the dance floor.

I know. Dance floor.

Andy smiled at my mom, who sighed and gave in.

"Would you like to dance?" Jesse asked once they were gone.

I sighed and looked at the dance floor. "Why not?" I said with a shrug.

Jesse was wonderful to dance with. No complicated steps (like the one time Paul had convinced me to dance at prom. That dance was over before it started), no awkwardness. Just simply putting my head on his shoulder and letting him rock me back and forth.

"I have a surprise for you at home," he whispered in my ear.

I turned my head to see his beautiful eyes only centimeters from mine. "Really? Can I have a hint?"

He pushed his lips together, thinking. "I got off work early to make it perfect."

"A cake?"

He shook his head.

"A . . . clean house?"

He kissed my forehead as the song came to an end. "You'll see."

L7L7L7L7

Jesse blindfolded me with his hands as he led me thorough the house.

"This better be good," I told him. He laughed.

I heard the bedroom door squeak open - a sure giveaway.

He leaned down and whispered, "Are you ready?" in my ear.

I nodded. I could smell candles - vanilla candles. I remember reading in the _Cosmo_ I had left in the bathroom that vanilla was the ultimate sensual smell.

Had Jesse been reading my _Cosmos_?

He took his hands away.

Oh yeah. He had defiantly been picking through his fair share of my magazines. But in a good way.

There were candles everywhere, and all the lights were off. The bed had been made to look warm and inviting, and a bottle of champagne sat in a holder beside the bed.

"Don't laugh," Jesse said, a little shame faced.

I hit his arm. "Why would I laugh? It's wonderful. You did a great job."

"Wait," he said, and went to the radio/alarm clock. A quiet bluesy-jazz came on. "Music? Or no music?"

"I like the music, actually."

He came back and, with one quick motion, picked me up.

Those three seconds between him picking me up and him setting me on the bed were beyond words. My heart pounded so hard I could hear it in my ears. My stomach erupted into butterflies, going all over my body. Everywhere he touched me was so sensitive, all my nerves endings lit on fire.

"I'm so proud of you," he whispered, and kissed me.

L7L7L7L7L7

My job hunt started Monday.

I first put in my application at a private practice in Carmel. The nurse that took it form me snapped something about "The boss being so cheap he probably wouldn't hire anyone", so I didn't get my hopes up.

A had an interview at a pediatrics practice next.

I had been a little turned off by the idea of working with kids - but a job's a job right?

I was being interview by the HR guy, a kind of strict looking man in his forties.

"Why do you think you're right for his job?" he asked.

"Well, I really like nursing. And I like kids, too."

Lie, lie. Could he tell? He looked kind of skeptical.

"Any other reason?" he asked.

I shook my head.

He gave me my resume back. "I'll let you know if you get the job," he said. Now he was lying.

My next interview went along the same lines. But that didn't discourage me from the interview I was waiting for - at the hospital.

I know. Jesse was going to kill me. But, one day, he would be grateful. I just knew it.

My interviewer - an older woman trying to hard to be _my_ age again - smiled when I came and took a seat in front of her desk.

"Are those the new Steve Madden pattens?" she asked.

I looked at my shoes and nodded.

"I have been wanting a pair just like those! They are gorgeous!"

"Thanks," I said with a smile.

She looked at my resume. "Very impressive," she said.

"Thank you."

She looked at it again, then at my hand. "It says 'miss' here. Did you recently get married?"

I looked at my ring. "Oh, no. I'm engaged."

She smiled. "Really? How wonderful."

The interview process continued, and by the end I felt like I had gotten the job.

"So," she said. "What does your fiancé do?"

"Oh, he's a doctor."

"Really? Where?"

Oops.

"Um, um . . . here."

"What department?"

"Emergency room."

Her eyes got wide. "YOU are Dr. Jesse's fiancée?"

That's what they called him? Dr. Jesse?

"You know Jesse?"

She whipped the shock off her face. "Well, we'll contact you if you get the job, Miss Simon. Thank you."

"Um, thanks."

_L7L7L7L7L7_

I went to the cafeteria and got a crappy cup of coffee.

But hey, it was still caffeine, right?

I was going over the interview over and over in my head when a brown hand sat a cup of Starbucks down in front of me.

I looked up to see Jesse's smiling face as he sat down across from me.

"How was the interview?"

"You knew?"

He laughed. "You would be surprised how fast gossip travels around here."

I sighed and put my head in my hands. "It sucked. Totally."

"How?"

"She found out we're engaged. So I'm _so_ not getting the job."

"You don't know that."

I looked up at him. "Yeah. I do."

He reached forward for his own Starbucks - black, with one shot of expresso - and, after taking a long sip, said, "You will find the right job."

"Yeah right."

He smiled and looked at his watch. "Well, I heard you were around and thought you might like something better than the coffee they serve here, but I wasted most of my break." He leaned forward to kiss my forehead. "I'll see you later."

I sighed and nodded.

I took my resume and my purse and walked down the hall to the elevator.

There was a woman wearing one of those white doctor's jackets when I got on. She smiled at me.

"You wouldn't happen to be looking for a job, would you?"

I almost let my mouth drop open. "Um, yes. Actually, I am."

"Well I'm looking for a nurse. My name is Jackie Fraser. I'm in a private OB/GYN practice in the professional tower. My nurse just moved, and I'm really desperate to find someone to fill her shoes."

"I . . . I'm a nurse."

She smiled. "Wonderful! It's a great job - you get to work one-on-one with patients, and I'm only open Monday through Friday, nine to four. Plus, full benefits and two weeks payed vacation."

I sounded like _she_ was trying to sell the job to _me_!

"That sounds wonderful," I said, still astound. I handed her my resume. "Please call me if you, you know, want to hire me."

The elevator stopped and Jackie took my resume. "I will, um," she looked at the paper, "Suze."

The doors shut and I sighed, leaning against the wall.

As soon as I did the lights in the car flickered. I looked up, thinking it was just a bulb.

They flickered again, and the car jumped to a stop and started again. Ok. So not a bulb.

I pressed the button for the next floor, but the car kept going, and suddenly the power went off completely. The car screeched to a stop.

I screamed in the pitch black.

_Stay clam! _I told my self. _You aren't going to die._

_Yeah right!_ the other part of my brain argued. _It's going to be just like the Tower of Terror in Disney World . . . only this time you don't have a safety bar. _

_Oh, and you're not stopping either. _

Oh God. What should I do?

_Call Jesse_, both sides of my head agreed.

Good idea.

I felt around until I found my phone in my purse. The little bit of light it cast was a reassurance.

I hit the speed dial for his number.

"Hello?" he answered quietly. He must have been working.

"JESSE!" I screamed. "I'm trapped on an elevator!"

"What?"

"THE ELEVATOR! I'M TRAPPED! THE POWER'S OFF! I'M GOING TO DIE!!"

"Susannah," he said. "Stay calm. The elevator by the cafeteria?"

"YES!"

"Just stay calm and don't move. I'm coming."

The line went dead.

I sank into a corner of the elevator. Using my little bit of light, I looked for the emergency phone. I wasn't surprised to see the cord had been cut.

"You aren't going to win!" I yelled into the dark. "You aren't going to kill me!"

The car creaked.

I could feel her there, somewhere. Reaching back up for the emergency phone (which would be an excellent weapon) I felt a prink on my arm.

Then the feeling of another presence in the elevator car was gone.

Suddenly, the power cut back on. The car started moving up this time, and stopped on the fifth floor.

Jesse was there when the doors opened, as well as a maintenance man.

I wrapped my arms around him.

Jesse. Not the man.

"You're a very lucky girl," the guy said. "Thankfully it was just the power. Another minute or two and that cab would have--"

"Thank you very much," Jesse said, "for saving her."

He smiled and turned away.

"Why are you bleeding?" Jesse asked me.

"I'm bleeding?" I looked down to see my arm had a small gash in it. "I must have just hit it on--" It suddenly caught my eye. Two words written on the opposite wall in blood.

My blood.

DEAD BRIDE

Looking at my arm, and back at the wall, may head started to spin. Luckily, Jesse was there to catch me.


	14. Chapter 14

This chapter was written by the following music:

kelsey by metro station

paper planes (!) by MIA

pressure by paramore

change by taylor swift

free falling (redone) by john mayer (originally by tom petty)

let it rock by kevin rudolf

i don't care by fall out boy

love story by taylor swift

hero/herione and thunder by girls like boys

flashing lights by kanye west

sex on fire by kings of leon

I woke up to someone stroking my hair. It felt so good, I closed my eyes again.

"No, no," Jesse said gently, and the bed raised. I groaned. "Keep you eyes open if you can, dear."

I opened them.

Jesse was sitting on a doctor's stool beside me, a little smile playing on his lips. He pulled out a small flashlight. "Get ready," he warned, and shined it in each eye.

I groaned again.

"How do you feel?" he asked. "Any thing hurting?"

"Just my pride," I whispered. I _never_ fainted.

He just smiled at me again.

I looked down at myself - I still wearing the black dress for my interviews. My Steve Maddens were in the corner. No IVs. No machines.

I tried to sit on the side of the bed, but Jesse stopped me.

"Easy, Susannah. You might be a little dizzy." He steadied me until I was sitting up. I _was_ dizzy.

It cleared soon enough, though, and he helped me stand. I put on my heels - Jesse looked a little disapprovingly on that, but they were the only shoes I had.

He helped me to his car (thank God we took the back way out, and I wasn't seen by any of his colleagues), and I fell asleep on the way home. It turns out that passing out makes you very tired.

L7L7L7L7

The next week passed with no further "warnings" (if you could call it that) from Lea.

Jackie, the doctor I meet on the elevator, held true to her promise. I had a job as her (one and only) nurse, starting the Tuesday after I came back from New York.

I told Jesse this news when he came home, and he immediately picked me off my feet and kissed me. Then, still holding me bride-style, he turned a little shamed faced.

"I have a little bad news."

"WHAT?"

He smiled a little. "Not that bad, _querida_. I just can't come to New York until Friday night."

"Why?"

"I have to work. I'm sorry, Susannah. I promise to make it up to you."

I shook my head. "They work you too much, Jesse! What do they expect of you?"

He sighed. "I'm a resident, Susannah, and that's just how we're treated. It will pay off very soon."

I rolled my eyes.

He smiled and kissed my neck.

"You better make this good, Jesse."

He looked into my eyes and smiled. "Oh, don't worry," I whispered. "I've been thinking of you all day."

L7L7L7L7

Thursday morning came sooner than I expected. I had packed all my bags the day before (one very large one, plus a carry-on with all my toiletries. And let me tell you, it isn't easy fitting everything into a bottle under three ounces, in two quart size zip locks. Not at all.)

Jesse made the long drive with me to the airport at five in the morning, for which I was very appreciative. I mean, it took a pretty deep love to drive one hour - both ways - from Carmel and back. Not to mention having to go to work afterwards.

He pulled up at the unloading zone by the doors and helped me get my bags out of the trunk.

I wrapped my arms around him.

"You can just say you got the flu or something, you know. They would totally believe you."

He chuckled and stroked my hair. "I will be there tomorrow night, Susannah. I promise."

I looked up at him. "But you've never flow before. What if you get lost and end up in, like, Mexico?"

He looked over my shoulder, through the glass windows of the airport. "I think, with all those people, I can find someone to follow."

I pouted. He laughed.

"It's either now, or our honeymoon."

"I know," I mumbled.

He kissed my forehead, then my lips. "Call me as soon as you land, alright? And _please_, no shopping sprees until I'm there to supervise."

"I can take you on a shopping spree?"

He pursed his lips. "Maybe."

I hugged him tight again. He kissed me. "Go," I told him, "before you're late."

He gave me a kiss I felt to my toes, then whispered, "Call me, please," into my ear, and started for his car.

I stood on the sidewalk and watched him pull away with a final wave. He waved back, and I blew him a kiss.

The line for bag check-in was - at least - twenty feet long. I thought I was going to die, but luckily another line opened up, and I pounced on it quickly.

The lady behind the desk smiled at me. "Can I see your conformation and ID?"

"Yeah," I said, rooting around my Coach tote for it. I sighed with relief when I found it, and gave it to her.

I watched her look though it all, then check my face a few times to make sure it was me and not a terrorist dressed as a twenty-something woman in a Free People baby doll dress and Tory Burch flats.

That would be one fashion-forward terrorist.

Her fingers flew over the keyboard.

"What day will you be returning?"

"Um, Monday."

She nodded, doing some more typing. "Would a nine-thirty AM or a five AM flight be better?"

"Um, nine-thirty, please."

She did some more typing. This seriously reminded me of that scene in _Meet the Parents_ where Ben Stiller's character is trying to get a flight out of New York.

"Okay," she said with a smile, and handed me my papers back. "Your flight leaves from terminal five."

After making my way through security, I stopped by the Starbucks and bought a grande coffee with caramel and cream, as well as a oatmeal cookie.

Next I stopped by the little gift shop and bought a _People_ and a _Cosmo_ (thankfully, both of the new issues had come out today).

Terminal five was full of busy business people types, but I was able to find a seat close enough to the boarding lines, so that when they announced that section A (to which I belonged, thankfully) could board, I jumped to my feet and was first in line.

I got a window seat in the middle of the plane put my carry-on in the overhead compartment.

Someone bumped into me, and I turned around to look into a pair of gorgous blue eyes.

Not that they rivaled Jesse's or anything. But they were nice.

The guy smiled at me. He was wearing a button-down shirt and suit pants, and his suit jacket was thrown over one arm.

"Is this seat taken?" he asked with a smile. I shook my head. He smiled and, after putting his laptop into the overhead, too, sat in the seat next to me.

"Are you going to New York for business, or pleasure?"

The way he said pleasure made my heart flutter. This guy was _hot_.

BUT I'M ENGAGED!

"Um, pleasure. To visit my grandmother." (AND PICK OUT MY WEDDING DRESS! WHY CAN'T I SPIT IT OUT!?)

He smiled. "Are you originally from that area?"

I smiled and nodded.

We were interrupted by the stewardess, who told us what to do in case we crashed into water, yada, yada, yada.

I couldn't get over how I was flirting with the guy beside me! I was so ashamed of myself!

Finally, we taxied to the runway and took off. The hottie beside me remained silent until we had reached a decent altitude, then he started with his questions again.

I had been wrapped up in my _Cosmo_ (an article called_ 25 Things To Do To Your Man TONIGHT_) when the hottie said, "I'm Mark, by the way."

Mark? That wasn't a hot name. Jesse was a hot name. Mark was creeper-ish.

"I'm Suze," I said with a smile.

He smiled back. "Suze. I like that. Is it short for something?"

"Um, Susannah."

"Oh," he said, like it wasn't that pretty or something. "What do you do?"

"What do you mean?"

He smiled again. "For a living."

"Oh, I'm a nurse."

"That's cool. I'm a marketing communications manager."

"What is that?"

He laughed a little. "I pretty much just do marketing stuff for a pharmaceutical company."

"Oh," I said. "That's cool."

"Yeah, it's pretty easy. I make seventy-thousand on staff level."

Okay. Mr. Braggie was getting on my nerves. "Well," I said. "My fiance makes eighty-thousand as a resident doctor."

His face got a little red. "Oh . . . you're engaged?"

"Yeah," I said with a big smile. "To a doctor, too."

"Damn," he whispered. "I should have gone to medical school."

We didn't talk the rest of the trip - I acted busy reading my magazines or deleting messages from my cell phone.

We finally landed, and, grabbing my carry-on, I followed the rest of the passengers off and into the chaos of La Guardia International Airport.

The walls were dirty. The people were crabby.

I was _home_.

It was a revelation to me, as I waited for my bag, how much of my life this city had _missed_.

I realized I hadn't stepped foot in the most amazing city in the world since before I had meet Jesse - the man who had changed my life singlehandedly.

And to think that, in just forty-eight hours, he would be here . . . well, it was like the two parts of my life - the old, crazy Suze who spent everyday by her best friend's side in this huge metropolis, and the new, still crazy Suze who never left the man that was soon to be her husband's side in the quaint little beach-town of Carmel - were finally colliding. Becoming, not whole, not one, but . . . _familiar_ with each other.

And that was _weird_. Life before Jesse had been awkward and strange . . . life with him was natural and . . . just normal.

Just _me_.

A taxi took me to my grandmother's house - a roomy, two story place in a neighborhood where all the houses had been built right next to each other.

I knocked on the the door and, after no answer, opened it . . .

. . . only to be bombarded by Gina and confetti.

"Surprise!" she yelled.

I wrapped Gina up in a big hug. "God, girl, I've missed you!"

"Where's the latin lover?" she asked, hugging me back.

I sighed and pulled away from her. "He couldn't get off work, so he's coming in tomorrow evening."

"Well, I guess that's the problem with being a doctor." My grandmother came out of the kitchen, carrying a glass of champagne for me. She hugged me after she put it in my hand.

"Yeah," I said with a laugh.

My grandmother held me at arm's length and and looked me over. I hadn't seen her since I had left for Carmel . . . what, eight years ago?

It hit me that she had never met Jesse, either. Everything seemed so weird.

I drank some of the champagne.

"Go on," my grandmother said to Gina, who was standing behind me. "Just don't be out too late. You two have dress shopping to do tomorrow."

Gina grabbed my hand and my bag and hauled me upstairs, to the room Jesse and I would be sharing.

I was relieved to see the twin bed had been traded for a queen-sized one.

"Where are we going?" I asked Gina as she rooted through my bag. She pulled out a strappy blue dress and threw it at me. I put it on, then the heels she had thrown my way as well.

"Out," she said with a smile.

I sighed and rolled my eyes, but followed her back down the stairs and through the living room, where my grandmother was watching _House_.

"Don't be too late!" she told us with with a laugh.

Gina put her arm through mine and led me to the subway station three blocks up. The train wasn't very crowded, and we got seats easily.

I sighed and collapsed into the plastic seat.

"Tired or something?" she laughed.

"Yeah," I said bitterly. "What time is it?"

"Six," she said. "I thought we would get some dinner before we go to a club."

"See, it's like three in California."

She rolled her eyes. "I knew that place would make you soft, Simon."

I smiled. "You can't call me that much longer, you know."

"De Silva," she said in the same tone, and shook her head. "Naw. You'll always be Simon to me."

The subway came to a screeching halt, and we filled off with the small crowd of people that had got on at previous stops.

Gina hooked her arm through mine and we walked up the stairs of the station and onto the sunset-strained street. Gina let me to an Italian restaurant, where we ate at a table overlooking a still bare courtyard. No matter how warm it was in Carmel, it was still freezing in New York.

"So," she said after the waiter brought us our drinks and bread and had taken our order. "I've been dying to tell you."

"What?" I asked, breaking off a piece of bread.

"I met a guy."

"Really? Where?"

She leaned back in her seat. Gina had never had any fat on her, - I mean, it was just _impossible_ for her to gain weight - so she could pull off tiny dresses and heels wonderfully. Her hair had changed since the last time I saw her - she had traded in her classic copper curls for mocha-colored waves.

"Work," she answered, with a smile.

"Co-worker?"

She shook her head. "Boss."

"Gina!"

She laughed. "He promoted me to be his _personal_ receptionist. So I get to see him, like, all the time now."

"Is he married?"

"Um, no. What kind of person do you think I am, Simon?" she laughed. "He's, like, twenty-nine, I think. And he is _beautiful_."

"So are you going to ask him to the wedding?" I asked.

"I'm working up to that," she said with another smile.

Our food came out, and we finished it quickly, both starving. We got back on the subway and went to a club next.

It was a pretty nice place . . . I mean, as nice as a club can be. But there were no random stains on the floor, and no overly drunk people.

"I'll get us a drink, since you paid for dinner," I yelled in Gina's ear. She nodded and made her way into the sea of people.

I pushed my way up to the bar and ordered two Cosmos.

"Hey," I heard a male voice say beside me. I turned to see a tall, handsome man.

"Hey," I said back, and pushed my hair behind my ear with my left hand. He noticed my ring and, after giving me a little nod, looked the other direction.

Wow! This thing really does work.

Gina came up to the bar and turned me around. "He's here!" she hissed.

"Who?"

"Tom," she whispered. "My boss."

"So? Go say hi." The waiter put our drinks on the bar, and I handed them both to Gina. "Here, give him one."

"No! Guys don't drink Cosmos!" She got the bartender's attention and ordered a margarita.

"Where is he?" I asked, scanning the crowd. She pointed to a handsome man in jeans and a button down shirt, sitting alone at a table.

"Maybe he's here on a date," she said, worried. "Oh, God. I'm going to embarrass the hell out of myself."

Her margarita was up; I took my Cosmo back and pushed it into her hand. "Go, Gina. This might be it." I pushed her forward.

She made her way through the crowd and to her boss's table. He invited her to sit, so he must have been alone. He also took the margarita.

I watched them chat for a while, finishing my Cosmopolitan. Suddenly, I just wanted to go to bed. It must have been jet lag.

I sat down my glass and went back out onto the cool street, and walked slowly to the subway station. It was so wonderful to be back home.

No, that wasn't right. This wasn't home. Carmel was home. My and Jesse's little beach house was home.

This had been home once, but, sadly, it wasn't any more.

The sub ride was a quick one, and I let myself in with the key my grandmother kept under her mat. She was already in bed.

I put on a pair of Jesse's boxers and a t shirt, then collapsed into the little-used bed. I grabbed my phone and, after looking through my contacts, hit the number that said home.

"Hello?" Jesse answered, and his deep voice sent chills up my spine.

"I miss you," I said back, only it was kind of muffled by the pillow my face was mushed into.

"I miss you, too," he said with a chuckle.

"What are you doing?"

"Just eating dinner."

I looked at my clock. It was ten . . . so seven in Carmel? "I'm so confused on time," I said. "It feels like it should still be light outside . . . but I'm so tired." I sighed. "I think it will be better when you're here, though."

He chuckled again. "I'm counting down the hours."

"I'm going to buy the sexiest outfit you've ever seen tomorrow."

"You're not wearing something sexy right now?"

The tone in his voice made me wake up a little. "Well, maybe. Just some panties. That's all."

He groaned softly into the phone. I heard him set his plate down, - in the sink? - and then the creak of our couch as he laid down. "That's all?"

"Hm-hum," I said. A little white lie wouldn't hurt. "That's _all_."

"Oh, Susannah," he whispered. "You-"

The phone went dead. I looked at my bars - I had full signal. I tried to call back, but the operator's voice told me that the line wasn't working.

Curious, I turned on the TV.

EARTHQUAKE NEAR SAN FRANCISCO the screen read.

DEATHS ALREADY REPORTED


	15. Chapter 15

IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE WINNING WEDDING DRESS FOR SUZE GO TO:

www.maggiesottero .com/dress.aspx? showAll1&pageSize8 &styleS5112

(no spaces, of course)

THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO VOTED!

I came downstairs as soon as the light started to show through my windows.

I had been trying to call Jesse all night, but all the lines - house, cell, even work - were dead.

So were my mom's, Andy's, my brothers, Father D.'s, Kristen, or anyone else I could think to call.

The news didn't say much, other than that the epicenter was right outside of San Francisco, and the waves had been felt all the way past Carmel.

When I got to the kitchen I saw my grandmother was already up.

"I guess you heard," she said, noticing my phone held tight in my hand. "Have you been able to get ahold of them?"

I shook my head. She gave me a hug, and I collapsed into a chair.

"Let me make you some crepes, huh? You like crepes, right?"

"Grandma, I like anything you cook."

She kissed my head and went to work. I stared down at my phone, thinking the worst - he was dead. He was going to show up any minute as a ghost again and we would never get married.

Or worse. He wouldn't show up. He would move on.

My phone lit up, and almost vibrated off the table. I grabbed it and, without looking at the number, said, "Hello?"

"_Querida_," I heard his voice say.

"JESSE! You're alive! Oh my God, Jesse, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. All the phone lines have been down for a while."

"Is our house okay?"

"Yes, yes."

"Did you talk to mom? Andy? Father D.?"

"Yes, everyone is fine. Well, I take that back. Andy sprained his wrist, but your mother assures me that the brace will be off before the wedding."

"Wait . . . is my car . . . ?"

"Your car is fine, dear."

I let out a deep breath, then was worried again. "Your flight . . . "

"I've already called. Everything was fine at the airport, and I'll still be there at seven."

"Good," I said, relaxing. "Wait . . . it's like three in the morning there. Why are you up?"

"More like two. And I was called into work. But that means I get to go home and sleep before my flight, which I'm very happy about."

"Good," I said again.

Jesse chuckled. "Sounds like you need some rest. Please go back to bed." His voice turned into a whisper. "I don't think we will be getting much sleep tonight."

I laughed tiredly. "Probably not. Call me before you leave, okay? I love you."

"I love you, too," he said. "Goodnight."

I sat down my phone and put my head on the cold table.

"Is everything okay?" my grandmother asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Andy just sprained his wrist. I'd call, but it's like two there."

"Why don't you go back to bed, dear, and I'll make those crapes when you wake up."

I nodded and pulled myself out of the chair and up the stairs. I don't even remember hitting the bed.

L7L7L7L7

By the time I woke up, it was well past time for crepes.

I made my way to the kitchen again, only this time to find Gina had taken my place in the chair.

"I heard about the earthquake!" she said when I sat down. "How awful. Is everything okay?"

I nodded. My grandmother sat down a plate with a reuben sandwich in front of each of us. I dug in.

"Don't eat too much," Grandma warned. "You don't want to be bloated for when you try on dresses."

Dresses. I had forgot all about that.

Gina smiled at me. "We are going to go everywhere until we find your dress! Even if it takes us three days."

"I hope we find it today," I said, rubbing my eyes.

Gina stood up and grabbed my arm. "Come on," she said. "Let's get you dressed so we can find you some Starbucks."

I nodded and followed her upstairs.

She found some of my skinny jeans and a deep purple light-knit scoop neck sweater.

"You want me to straiten you hair?" she asked. "I'll tell you all about my night . . . "

"Yeah!" I said, then yawned. She pulled the chair out from under the desk in the corner and had me sit in it while her straightener heated up.

I fought another yawn and asked, "Did you go home with him?"

She parted my hair into three sections after brushing it through, then clamped the first section between the hot metal plates. "Mm-hum."

"Did you go all the way?"

She nodded, meeting my eyes in the mirror in front of us.

"Was it good?"

"Wonderful. Best ever. I think I'm going to marry him."

"Really?" I laughed.

"Seriously. I'm in love already."

"So you asked about him being a date for the wedding . . . ?"

She bit her lip. "Well, it's still a little awkward, you know. But he wants to meet me for dinner tomorrow. Oh, and he said me would 'miss me' today, since I was taking a day off."

"_Ewww_," I said, but not in the gross way. More in the juicy-gossip way.

"I know, right? So I think something's there." She finished with my hair and turned off her straightener.

"Totally," I agreed, and got dressed, then threw on my Tory Burch flats for yesterday. You can never go wrong with couture.

We started our search in Manhattan, on Fifth Avenue to be exact. Gina had to practically pull me away from all the shops. She promised me we would come back, though.

The first shop we tried was called _Brides of Manhattan_. It looked pretty swanky, even on the outside.

The inside was even nicer. There were chandeliers and coffee and chocolates and big, comfy looking couches.

A very happy looking blonde woman was standing at the door when we came in, and she smiled and said, "Welcome! Welcome! What can I do for you two ladies?"

"Well," Gina said, "she is looking for a wedding dress. The _perfect_ wedding dress."

I shot Gina a look that said,_ I can handle this one on my own, thanks_.

"What kind of wedding?" she asked.

"Um, a beach wedding."

"Oh, New England?"

"Um, no. I actually live in California." Great. Now she thought I was some kind of tourist.

"California! My sister lives there! Do you live near LA?"

"Um, no. Carmel Beach, actually. It's close to San Francisco."

"Oh!" she said. "With the earthquake, right? God, is everyone okay?"

"Yeah," I said. "Everyone's fine. So I'm kind of looking for a strapless dress, something very summer-y."

"Right, right," she said. "Are you a . . . "

"A six," I said, a little sadly. "But I might can fit into some fours."

She pursed her fat lips. "I don't know. Wedding dress designers cut pretty true to size. But we can try, we can try."

I sent her a hard look, but the comfy couch she ushered us to kind of made up for it.

She disappeared, and we were offered cookies and coffee by another employee. Gina took advantage, but I didn't. I was still kind of stung from the "true to size" remark.

The lady came back, this time pulling a rolling rack of dresses.

"All these are sixes. I think I pulled one four . . . "

I got up and came to feel the material of the first dress. It was silky and frail.

"Can I try this one?"

"Of course!' she said, and ushered me into a changing room. She hung several of the dresses she had pick out on the wall before pulling the green fabric curtains to.

I started with the first dress. There was no mirror in the changing room - I had to go outside to the triple mirror.

I stepped on the little box in from of the mirror while the saleslady pulled and tugged in various places on the dress.

I shook my head to Gina, who had come up behind me.

She nodded in agreement.

I went back for a second time. And a third. And a fourth. Finally I let my frustration build and we left.

The pattern continued all day. Every place we went the dresses sucked.

It was nearing five o'clock when my grandma called to remind me that we were supposed to meet Jesse at seven.

"I know!" I said. "I just have one more shop, and we're on our way."

"Okay," she said. "Don't be discouraged if you can't find anything."

"I know," I almost snapped, and hung up the phone.

Gina smiled at me in the waning light. "Maybe we can try tomorrow."

"No," I said. "This one more, then that's all."

We had stopped in front of a little wedding boutique. The door was painted pink and pink drapes hung in the windows. Not my cup of tea, but I would try.

A little bell went off when we walked through the door. The gray-haired lady at the desk looked up from her bills and pursed her lips.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said. "I, um, wanted to look at some dresses."

She put her watch close to her eyes and sighed. "Well, I'm about to close. But I guess we can make it quick. What's your size?"

"Um, four."

"That's too bad," she said.

"Why?"

She stepped around her desk and to a door to her left. She went through it, then came back with the most beautiful dress I had ever seen.

"I only have this in a six," she said.

"No!" I said. "I lied! I'm a six! I really am!"

She smiled and shrugged. "You can try it if you like, sweetie."

My clothes had never came off so fast.

Well, I take that back. Let's just say _I_ had never taken my clothes off so fast.

I stepped into the dress and pulled it up, then came out of the tiny dressing room to have Gina lace up the back.

Then I went to the triple mirror.

It was like it was made for me. The strapless corset hugged me perfectly. The slim A-line made me look so thin and perfect. The sweetheart neckline was adorned with lace and crystals and pearls and sequins.

I turned around to see the corset-like lace up. God, did my butt look great!

I turned around again. I was almost crying.

"Do you like it?" the gray-haired woman asked.

"I _love_ it," I whispered.

"Good," she said. "I've been trying to sell it for weeks. Last dress from the Spring collection I had."

"How much?" I asked.

She looked up at me, then took the pen out from behind her ear and wrote on the pad she had in her hands.

"Well," she said, "with it being discounted . . . and the last one . . . Let's just say eight-hundred even."

Eight hundred. Jesse was going to flip.

"I'll take it," I said. "But only if you can hold it until tomorrow. My fiance had to see it."

"Honey, I can hold it all week as long as I get rid of it."

I was sad to take it off. The ivory silk felt so wonderful as it slid off my body. I hung it perfectly and returned it to the lady.

"Gladice," she said, offering a hand. "And I'll hold it till Friday."

"You have a deal, Gladice," I said, shaking her hand.

L7L7L7L7L7

Seven o'clock inched closer.

I went back to my grandmother's and freshened up. My grandmother gave us some cab money and apologized for not being able to come.

"It's bingo night," she said. "They raised the pot to five-hundred."

"We understand," I said. And I did. She was paying for our honeymoon.

We flagged down a cab a block or so over.

The ride to the airport was torture. Every little mile, getting closer and closer to Jesse. It was killing me.

Finally, though, we pulled up in the loading zone of the airport. I happily jumped out, while Gina yelled behind me she would stay and hold our cab.

I walked through the double doors leading to the place where all the luggage comes out. There was a ramp that led to the actual airport, where passengers filed through, some in business clothes, some looking like lost tourists.

And then, coming around the corner, was one confused man who could never be considered a stupid tourist. He was much too cute.

As soon as he saw me I started running to him, and we met halfway, his arms wrapping around me.

He smelled so good. I had forgotten how me smelled in one day.

And his arms felt so wonderful around me . . . so warm and strong. So great.

I looked up into his eyes, which were burning down into my own with all this . . . this fire. Sexy, beautiful fire.

I pulled his lips down on mine and gave him a good, wet kiss. And, for once, he didn't seem to mind the PDA.

He pulled away to say, "I need to get my luggage."

"Right," I panted.

We went to the baggage carousel and waited on his bag.

"How was your flight?" I asked.

"Good," he said with a smile. "Very good."

"Good," I said. The sexual tension was killing me.

Gina did us the courtesy of sitting in the front when we got back in the cab. She also chatted with the cab driver, giving us ample time to talk.

Well, okay, kiss and cuddle. But we talked a little, too.

The cab came to a halt in front of my grandmother's once again. It had started raining, and we grabbed Jesse's bag out of the trunk and ran for the door.

My grandmother wasn't home yet, but I found the hidden key and let us in.

Gina wouldn't leave, even though I dropped several hints. I ended up making us some grilled cheeses for dinner.

No sooner had Gina started out the door did my grandmother come home.

"Did you win anything?" I asked, giving up hope that we would be left alone long enough to do anything.

"Only fifty dollars. Who is this handsome man?" she asked, seeing Jesse for the first time.

"This is your future grandson," I said, then made introductions.

"Well," my grandmother said. "I'd send you two anywhere." Then she got this look on her face and said, "Well, I'm beat, and I'm sure you two want some time together. I'll see you in the morning!" and disappeared to her room.

I eyed Jesse. "Is she in on the whole surprise honeymoon?"

"Actually, it was her idea."

"I should have guessed," I said.

Jesse surprised me by picking me up. "Where's the bedroom?" he asked happily.

L7L7L7L7L7

It's amazing how much you can miss someone over twenty-four hours.

It was like we had been apart for months, I thought when he pulled me into his chest later that night. God, he smelled so good. I can't believe I had forgotten how he smelled!

He started whispering sweet Spanish nothings (or, for all I know, they could have been somethings) in my ear.

I sighed and took my hands over his amazing chest, then vowed in my head to never leave him again.

Ever.

ONCE AGAIN GO LOOK AT THE DRESS X0X0


	16. Chapter 16

I stared at the calender at work. One week.

We had been home from New York for a few weeks now, and I had started my job. The wedding had inched closer and closer, but I was so busy with working and planning I had hardly even noticed how close it was.

Until now. Now all I could do was stare at the calender and gape.

Today was Friday. Tomorrow, Saturday, was the Bridal Shower. Final fitting this Tuesday, Jesse's last tux fitting Monday. Wednesday I take pictures for Cee Cee's story in the_ Pine Cone_. Thursday we go pick up the legal stuff, and I fill out the papers to change my last name. Then the rehearsal dinner. Then the bachelorette party.

Then the big day.

I tore my eyes from the calender and grabbed my keys. I was ready to get home.

Jesse was asleep in the hammock downstairs when I got there. He had worked a double shift and a half of another shift, and was so tired he didn't wake up until I had climbed in the hammock with him.

"Hum," he grunted, and stretched and wrapped his arms around me. "What time is it?"

"Three," I said. He didn't ask why I was home early. "When did you get off work?"

"Eleven," he said, eyes closed. "Came home, ate, showered, and fell asleep down here." He opened his eyes and kissed my nose. "And dreamt about you, _querida_."

"Really?" I asked. He kissed me again, on my neck. "What did you dream about?"

"Taking off that eight hundred dollar dress I wasn't allowed to see."

"It's worth it," I said. "Trust me."

"I do," he whispered, kissing me all the way up my neck, chin, and to my lips. "Or I would have never bought it."

His kisses got a little more playful, and his hands a little more frisky.

"Jesse," I said.

"What?" he asked between kisses. "You shouldn't have woken me up."

"Do you not remember who I have to go pick up today?"

He pulled away. A flash of annoyance went through his eyes as he remembered. "So can we have sex before she comes?"

I fought the sudden heat all over, and laughed. "We can tonight, Jesse."

He pouted. "But then I can't make you scream."

I blushed.

It wasn't a secret that I could get a bit loud when Jesse hit just the right note. Not that he minds. He actually just feeds off it.

But it was a little embarrassing.

He smiled playfully. "See what I mean?"

I sighed. "Only if it's a quickie. And I mean _damn_ quick."

"You won't be disappointed," he said, then rolled out of the hammock and picked me up in his strong arms.

I wasn't.

Five minutes later he rolled off of me with the same ease he had rolled out of the hammock with.

I snuggled close to him while we both tried to calm our breath down. He held me close to his chest, and I took my fingers through the silky black hair on it. He was _so_ sexy.

"I have a proposition," I panted.

"What?" he asked. His breath was a little more even - it was probably all those push ups he did.

"How about we take up a policy of abstinence - until our wedding night, I mean."

He pulled away and gave me a look. "Now you want to take up abstinence?"

I rolled my eyes. "Come on, Jesse. This will work. I read about it in - "

"_Cosmo_?" he finished with me. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Come on," I said.

"It's fine with me," he said. His accent was thick, like it always was after we have sex. It was just one more thing that I loved about him. "But don't start complaining - this is your idea."

"Please," I said, rolling my eyes. "I waited eight years. I think I can last a week."

"I waited one hundred and fifty years," he bragged.

"You didn't even know me."

He shrugged, and closed his eyes. "Can I go back to sleep now?"

"Sure. Sleep tight."

When I came back - fully dressed and clean - I crawled in bed beside him and gave him a few kisses on the ear. He mumbled something - probably in Spanish - and I got up.

Gina's flight came in at five. She was, mysteriously, toting two bags behind her. One of them was a Kate Spade set in purple.

"Where did you get that?" I asked.

She smiled. "I'll tell you in the car."

She flipped when she saw my car, and we put her bags in the trunk and got in.

"So," I said. "Spill."

She laughed. "Well, I got fired."

"Gina!"

"Hold on, hold on. I got fired but . . . Tom got me a better job."

"Oh," I said. "Things getting a little hot and heavy for the office?"

She laughed. "Totally. So now I'm a clothes buyer for Bloomingdale's, and I get all kinds of free stuff."

"Not fair!" I yelled.

She shrugged. "You get the husband, I get the job. Want to trade?"

"You wish," I whispered, and tilted my hand back in forth so my ring caught in the sun.

It had started to rain when we pulled out of the parking lot of the airport and started the long trek back to home. As we drove the rain came down harder and it got darker.

I wasn't paying much attention by the time we had got to Carmel, and when I pulled into the median to cross into our neighborhood I could hardly see from the rain.

But it was no big deal. I had crossed this intersection a hundred times, and the rain didn't really bother me.

I squinted, trying to see the on coming cars better.

"Are we moving?" Gina asked.

"What?" I looked away from the cars. We _were_ moving.

But that was impossible! I pressed down on the brake harder.

Then, suddenly, my foot was knocked off the brake by some unseen force. In the next second I watched the gas petal go to the floor, and the engine of my car squealed.

To my left a pair of bright lights came closer. And that's all I remembered.

L7L7L7L7L7

I woke up on bed. I knew it was a bed because I could feel the sheets and mattress under me.

But both were too soft to be a hospital bed. Was I at home? Had I dreamt it all?

I felt beside me - no Jesse. Just the end of the bed.

I opened my eyes. Everything around me was white and very bright.

I sat up strait quickly. No vertigo.

Oh, God. This wasn't good.

I swung my legs over and lowered one foot towards the smokey floor . . .

"Hey," I heard a slightly familiar voice say. "Don't even try it."

I looked to my right, where the voice had come from.

No, he couldn't be here. He had moved on. Right?

"Dad?" I asked.

He walked closer to me. He looked the same - only the outfit was different. No more hoodie and shorts. Now he was in white - very comfortable - looking pants and a white tee.

"In the flesh. Well, not really."

I sucked in a breath. "Am I . . . _dead_?"

He laughed. "No, no. Just conked out."

"Huh?"

He pointed to the smokey ground. I could see me - the real me - in a hospital bed. Jesse was beside me, on his knees, holding my hand. I could faintly hear his Spanish - it sounded like he was praying.

"Oh," I said. "Am I dying?"

"No, you'll be fine. Just a bruise or two. Should be back to normal by the wedding."

I looked away from the pitiful sight of Jesse and me and up at him. "Oh, you know?"

"Of course I know. I know everything."

I flushed red. Did he watch us? Had he seen us earlier, when Jesse had had his rare little urge?

Well, they weren't so rare, I guess. But it had been a little random.

"Oh," was all I could say.

He smiled. "You excited?"

"Um, yeah. I am."

"Good," he said.

I looked back down, but the scene looked the same.

"Do you approve?" I asked, nodding to Jesse.

I looked back up. My dad shrugged. "He's dedicated."

"_Dad_," I groaned.

He laughed good-naturedly. "Yeah, I guess. I certainly couldn't have found anyone better."

I smiled. I knew he approved. Or, at least, I knew he had to. The reason he had moved on was because I had had Jesse to take care of me.

So he must have known - that it was going to last, I mean. Jesse and me. Which gave me piece of mind. I mean, I had known, deep down. But sometimes I had had some serious doubts.

"He's a good guy," Dad said. I could tell it took a lot for him to say that.

"He's wonderful," I agreed.

My dad stood up a little straiter, then sighed. "You've got to go back, I'm afraid."

I tried to say something, but I couldn't. My voice was gone.

"I know," he said. "It's fine. And by the way, when you walk down the isle? I'll be there. Even if you can't see me."

My eyes filled with tears, but before one could roll down my cheek, I fell back into a black sleep.

L7L7L7L7

This time, when I felt the bed, I knew it was a hospital bed. I could hear the machines beep beside me. I could feel the IVs in my wrist and at the bend in my arm.

And, most importantly, I could hear Jesse's steady prayers beside me. They were rhythmic, like a song, in the deep Spanish that I had learned to love. It was very comforting, even though I couldn't understand it.

I opened my eyes - it was bright, just like before, but it wore off and I could see the little hospital room around me.

I squeezed Jesse's hand. His prayer dried up, and he looked up at me. Then he sighed and kissed my forehead.

"How do you feel?"

"Worried," I croaked, and cleared my throat. "How bad do I look?"

He grabbed a hand mirror off the table beside me and held it up. I was glad to see that my face was clear. I sighed.

"But," he said, and pulled the covers off me. He lifted up the hospital gown to reveal a deep bruise on my left hip.

"Ouch," I said. "I'm glad I can't feel it."

"Unfortunately, you will tomorrow." He pressed a button on the machine beside me and, very gently, took the two IVs out of my arm. Two Band-Aides came from no where, and he put them over the tiny places left.

"Aw, come on. Can't a have a little morphine to go?"

"Tylenol will work just fine."

I was relieved that he had brought me some sweats - had he had enough time to go home and get them?

I looked up at him in question.

"Your mother brought them."

"_You called Mom_?" I growled.

"I'm sorry. Someone had to sit with Gina. She was hysterical."

"Is she okay?" I gasped.

"She's just fine. Not a scrape."

"Lucky." Jesse helped me sit, then helped me dress with very gentle fingers.

"I love you," he whispered.

"Do you know what happened?"

"Let's not talk about it."

"No," I said. "Let's do. It was her."

"Who?"

"Lea."

"Susannah, we all make mistakes."

"No! It was her!"

He looked at me, then sighed.

"Okay. Whatever you say."

I took a deep breath and left it. He helped me stand.

"How am I going to have the Bridal Shower tomorrow?"

"You aren't. Your mother has called everyone and it has been moved to Sunday."

"But Jesse - "

"No buts. You're staying home tomorrow, and I'm going to take care of you."

Hum. That sounded like fun.

He helped me into a wheelchair - with much protest from me, of course.

"Susannah, please. Tonight has been horrible enough."

I pouted and sat down. He rolled me into the hall of the Emergency Room and to the nurses station, where he signed something and told the nurse goodbye.

"We can do this? Just leave?"

"Well, I am a doctor."

We had reached the waiting room - my mom and Gina practically ran to me when we came around the corner.

"Oh, sweetie," my mom said, hugging me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, I was so worried."

Gina stood behind her, peering down anxiously. She sighed after she had a good look at me.

My mom continued to hug me. "Don't worry about the shower, honey. I'll take care of everything."

"Yeah," Gina said. "We're going to set it all up tomorrow. You don't have to worry about anything."

"Thanks," I said. I was feeling a little grumpy. Not enough personal space, I think.

"Okay," Jesse said, sensing my mood. "Ready to go?"

My mom back away. "Yeah," I sighed.

Jesse lifted me into the car, which was parked in a "doctors only" spot. Gina got in the back seat.

"Get a good night's sleep, okay?" my mom said. "Don't worry about anything."

"Okay," I said.

Jesse shut the door and walked around to the driver's side.

Jesse's car seats were so comfortable. Almost as comfortable as . . .

"My car!" I gasped.

"I told you she'd remember," Gina said.

"Jesse!" I yelled, sitting up strait and grabbing his arm. "My car! Where's my car?"

He looked over at me and sighed. "You'll get it back by the end of the week."

"No! It got hurt? How bad? How bad!?"

"Not very," Jesse said.

"It just tore the bumper off, and smashed the door," Gina said. Jesse shot her a look, and she leaned back in her seat, away from me.

Jesse put his hand on my thigh - very gently, of course. "It will be as good as new. I promise."

I felt my eyes fill with tears. I couldn't help it.

My car.

Jesse kissed my hand and whispered, "It's okay, _querida_."

Gina patted my shoulder. "At least it wasn't your face."

Jesse shot her another look in the rear-view mirror. She leaned away again.

I sniffed. We came to the intersection where the wreck had been - there was glass everywhere.

I got really cold all of the sudden, and started shivering. I hoped it wasn't shock.

"Susannah, you're fine. Everything is fine, _querida_," Jesse whispered. I knew he was thinking the same thing. He sped across the two lanes to our neighborhood with ease.

I felt a little better, but still cold.

Jesse lifted me out of the car when we got home and carried me inside, Gina opening doors along the way.

Jesse laid me down in the unmade bed, then got an extra blanket. I instantly felt better under our warm blankets.

"Well, goodnight," Gina said, a little hesitant, and left. I only assumed she knew she was sleeping in the middle room, where I had borrowed and made up my mom's spare twin bed.

Jesse leaned over me and pressed a hand to my cheek.

"Stop," I whispered.

He sighed, then kissed my forehead. "Never scare me like that again, alright?"

I smiled in spite of myself. "I won't. I promise."

He produced a big blue pill and a bottle of water, then helped me sit up so I could take it.

He went to change clothes, and when he came back I could hardly keep my eyes open. I wondered in the back of my mind what he had slipped me.

"Go to sleep," he whispered, and kissed me again. All I could do was nod.

L7L7L7L7

The next morning I woke up to a rough kiss on the cheek. It wasn't necessarily the kiss that was rough - just the 5 o'clock shadow from the kisser.

I opened my eyes and looked at Jesse, who was laying beside me.

He smiled. "You need to wake up and take some medicine."

I nodded and stretched a little - only to be paralyzed by the pain in my leg.

"Ow," I whispered.

He helped me onto my back, then helped me sit up against the pillows.

"I'll be right back," he said, and walked quickly out of the room.

I looked around. It was daylight - the clock said ten. The windows were open, and I could hear the ocean outside. Spike was laying at the end of the bed, giving me the evil eye.

Jesse came back, carrying a tray with food.

"Breakfast in bed? How sweet."

He smiled and sat it down. My stomach agreed loudly. Eggs, bacon, toast.

"Are you trying to keep me out of my wedding dress?"

He smiled. "I don't think one little meal will hurt. Besides, you need some protein - it will help with the bruising.

I dug in. Delicious. "Where's Gina?" I asked, my mouth full.

"She left to help your mother. She told me to tell you 'Not to worry'."

I rolled my eyes.

"Cee Cee called," he said. "She wanted to come and interview us today. I told her I didn't know - "

"Why? What else do I have to do. Give me the phone!"

"Are you sure?" he asked. "Don't you want to wait just a little while?"

"I need to get something done," I said.

He sighed. "I told her you would call if you were up to it. Why don't you wait a little while and decide?"

I rolled my eyes.

"And the wedding planner is coming sometime this evening."

"Wonderful," I said, chewing my first piece of bacon. "Everyone wants to see me today."

Jesse smiled. "Of course they do. You're the bride right?"

I smiled at him, even when he stole the last of my bacon and replaced it with some Tylenol.

"We will have to order room service on our honeymoon," I said. "I like this whole breakfast in bed thing."

He smiled and nodded.

"Can I know where we are going yet?"

He frowned and shook his head.

"I hate you," I whispered.

He kissed my cheek. "After I cooked you this wonderful breakfast and everything?"

"Yes."

"And bought you that dress?"

"Well . . . "

"That's what I thought."

I pouted, and he took my empty tray and replaced it with a _Cosmo_.

"Okay," I said. "I love you."

He laughed. "I love you too, _querida_."

The next two hours could have been called heaven. We just laid in bed, watching TV, reading, playing footsie. Aside from what happened yesterday afternoon, it was the best thing we had done in bed in a while.

But everything has to come to an end, I guess.

"Susannah, you know I'm going to have to scold you."

"Why? About what?"

He dropped his magazine and sent me a look. "About driving like that."

"No!" I yelled, angry, then regretted it. Jesse had told me earlier that I had a bruised rib or two. "No, Jesse, it wasn't me okay? It wasn't!"

"Susannah, don't - "

"No! I _swear_ to you. I swear up and down - it was her. She wants me _dead_."

Jesse folded his arms across his chest. His face still looked doubtful, a little smirky . . . it made me want to hit him.

"You don't believe me, do you?"

"Call her."

"What?"

He shrugged. "If you want me to believe you, call her here and have her tell me that she hates you - that she wants you dead."

"Jesse, you know how I feel about that calling business. Besides, just because I do it doesn't mean she'll come."

"When you call someone they have to come."

"How do _you_ know?"

He raised and eyebrow. "From experience.

Oh. I had forgotten about that. "Jesse," I whispered, exasperated. "Please . . . just believe me. I'm going to be your _wife_, Jesse. You have to trust me."

"Why won't you call her?"

"Because," I said, laying against my pillows. "I don't won't to see her, okay?"

He looked at me, his face serious, then it softened. "Alright. I believe you."

"No you don't," I whispered. I couldn't even look at him. A tear rolled down my cheek.

He sighed and pushed off his pillows, then came and knelled if front of me. "Susannah," he said, whipping away the tear. "Of course I believe you. I'm sorry I didn't before."

I still didn't believe _him_, but I just nodded. He would get it back.

L7L7L7L7

I woke up the next morning with a serious headache. I think it was from Barbie, who had come by at six last night to stress me out even more about the wedding.

I opened my eyes to the bright sun coming through our windows. I could hear Jesse in the shower.

I laid in bed until he was out. I felt his face - soft, just shaved - against my skin as he kissed my shoulder and cheek. I turned over and smiled at him. His hair was still wet and his bare chest was warm.

"Good morning," he said gently.

"Good morning," I whispered back. "How do I look?"

"Beautiful. Every little piece, love." He stepped away and pulled on a t-shirt. "Gina is dying to get in here."

"Oh," I sighed. I had forgotten my bride duties. "Let her in, I guess."

He opened the door and slipped out, and Gina came rushing in, wearing a very cute dress. It looked like Juicy Couture.

"What are you still doing in bed?" she asked frantically. Before I could answer she had pulled me out and pushed me into the bathroom.

"Hey," I said. "Calm down. It's only ten."

She flipped the shower on. "Um, you have to help us put some last-minute things together. And people start coming at one! Do you think you have all day? Besides, it's going to take me for ever to curl your hair."

I rolled my eyes. "I thought _I_ was the bride."

"Whatever," she said, backing out. "I'm going to finish getting ready and heat up the curling iron. I hope you know what you're wearing."

"Um, of course."

"Good," she said, and left my bathroom. I took in a deep breath and started undressing. People stress me out to much.

After my shower, and forty minutes of hair curling, I put on my dress and looked in the mirror.

"I look fat," I said.

"God," Gina said, rolling her eyes. "You so do not. Now come on, we're going to be late."

"Just let me change - "

"No!" Gina said, pulling my arm to the living room. "Come on!"

Jesse was in the kitchen as I was being pulled hostage-style to the front door.

"Wait!" I said. Gina stopped. "Do I look fat?" I asked him.

He smiled. "Of course not."

That made me feel a little better. "Can we take your car? I'm carless, you know."

He shook his head. "I'm on call until five. I might have to go to work."

I rolled my eyes. This work thing was getting on my nerves. "Well can you drive us?"

"Of course." He put the sandwich he was about to eat in the fridge and grabbed his keys.

The car ride to my mom's was uneventful. Except for Jesse's pager going off, and his colorful swearing in Spanish.

"When do you think you will get off?" I asked when he parked in front of my mom's. There were white and gold balloons on the mailbox that I couldn't ignore.

"Five or six."

"Can you pick us up?" I made a sad face.

"Of course," he said.

I blew him a kiss. Gina made a gagging noise behind me.

"Shut up," I said. "I'm trying to save us from a ride with my mom."

"Sure," she said, sarcastically. "It's okay to admit to it."

"To what?"

"That you're crazy over him."

I laughed as we started up the stairs to the front door. "I've always been crazy over him."

Before I could grab the doorknob Gina grabbed my hand. I looked up at her with surprise.

"Before you get married . . . you owe me an explanation."

"About what?"

"Jesse."

I swallowed. "What are you talking about?"

She smiled at me. "You know. Don't lie."

My mom opened the door before I could come back with a witty comment.

"Thank God!" she said. "Suze, it can't get this punch to stay cold - I hope you can fix it. And Gina, here, take these and hang them on the rail." She handed Gina four balloons, two white, two gold.

My mom dragged me into the house. "You have to see what I got yesterday." We stopped in front of the dining room. A massive chandelier hung from the ceiling.

"Wow," I said. "It's gorgeous."

"I know!" she said, and hugged me. "Now go work on that punch."

The next few hours were swamped with putting out pastries and answering the door as all thirty-five of my guests arrived.

Everyone loved the lace cookies and the little mint things. Somehow we all ended up at the dining room table together talking and laughing - even though I didn't know half of the people around me.

I worst fears came true when my mom stood up and clinked her knife on her glass, and everyone got quiet. Oh God. Time for embarrassment.

"Well," she said. "I wanted to thank everyone for coming. This has been so important to us. And, also, I wanted to make a little toast." She turned to me. "To the bride, my daughter, and to her future husband. You know, I never thought that their relationship would last," she said to a smiling group of women around her. "But it has. And through so much too. I should have never doubted you, I guess." She smiled, fighting back tears. "To the bride!"

"To the bride!" everyone said. I smiled, then noticed my glass was shaking.

No, everything was shaking. Especially . . . Mom's new chandelier.

Before I could scream to clear the room, it came down on us.

L7L7L7L7

"Do you believe me now?" I asked as Jesse took the little pieces of glass out of the cut on my hand about thirty minutes later in the ER.

He was quiet for a second, then sighed and nodded. "I think I have to."

L7L7L7L7L7

ok so taylor swift's new cd FEARLESS comes out today.....its is so amazing. go buy it. now.


	17. Chapter 17

It was five.

We were on the beach, then sun was a huge orange ball sinking into the water.

Jesse stood closer to the shore line, and the wind pulled on his hair and his shirt. It made me breathless, it made me want to cry I was so happy. I walked closer.

"Stop, stop!" Barbie cried. "Suze, you have to go slowly. You'll get there, I promise."

I sent her a look that she didn't get, since she was critiquing the bridesmaids about how they should hold their bouquets.

Oh well. She couldn't ruin my moment. Andy took my arm again, and I walked a little slower, counting steps in my head.

"Okay," Barbie said. "That's a little too slow . . . okay that's good. Hurry it on up, you know what to do now."

I bit my lip from saying anything. Jesse, who was now only a yard away, smiled at me. I smiled back.

Barbie pushed me from behind until I had reached Jesse.

Father Dom opened his Bible.

"Okay," Barbie said, closing it for him. "We don't have to go through all that. So, you take her and she takes you, you're married, now I want you to turn a quarter of the way to the right - "

I grabbed Jesse and kissed him. He seemed a little surprised - but hey, we needed to practice, right?

When I let him go, Barbie was staring at me with a fake smile. She kind of looked like a real Barbie, actually.

"Did you get that out of your systems?" she asked. I nodded. "Good," she said. "So, turn around and the flower girl - where is the flower girl?"

The flower girl had been hard to find - we had settled on my cousin's daughter, Madison, a blonde headed seven year old. She was making a sand castle beside the bridesmaids.

"Okay," Barbie said, lifting her up. "Honey, you go that way," she pointed up the isle, "and throw your flowers, okay?"

Madison stood up and threw her "practice flowers" into the air.

"No!" Barbie called after her. "On the ground, honey! On the ground!" She sighed and turned to us. "Next you two come," she said, pointing.

We started down the isle, my arm wrapped tight around Jesse's. "By this time tomorrow we'll be walking down the isle for real," I told him.

"I know," he said back. "We'll be _married_."

We got to the end of the isle and I kissed him again. But no sooner had I put those wonderful lips to mine did I feel a thump on the head.

I looked up, and another came to my cheek. Then, suddenly, rain started coming down everywhere.

L7L7L7L7L7

"It will stop," I heard Jesse whisper. He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed.

I just kept looking out the window. A crowd of people were behind us, around the corner. The rehearsal dinner.

I should be out there playing hostess, but I couldn't. The rain made me want to cry.

"No it won't," I whispered back. "It's going to rain all day tomorrow."

Jesse spun me around and took my hands. "Then we will just go to plan B."

"Getting married in the church? Ugh."

He smiled. "Listen, Susannah. I don't care where I marry you. As long as I do."

I smiled. He kissed my forehead.

I felt a tug on my shoulder and turned around. All my bridesmaids were behind me.

"Can we borrow her for tonight?" Kristen asked with a dark smile. "We promise to bring her back in the morning."

"Of course," Jesse said, and let go of my hands.

"Really?" I asked. "Are we spending the night somewhere?"

"Of course!" Gina said. "Now come on before it gets too late!"

"Um, okay," I said. "Just, one minute to say bye, okay?"

Most of them rolled their eyes, but left. I flung my arms around Jesse's neck.

"I love you," I whispered to him.

"I love you too," he said back. "Be good. Not to much to drink, alright? And to tattoos."

"Tattoos?" I laughed. "I would be more worried about strippers."

"None of those either, Susannah."

I laughed again. "Okay, Jesse. I promise." I kissed him. "See you . . . at the alter, I guess."

He hugged me. "I might have to sneak in tomorrow and see you before."

"Okay," I whispered. Because I didn't think I could do it without seeing him.

Then my bridesmaids hauled me off to the car. I was just glad I had escaped without being seen by my mother.

"So," Gina said. "Drinks first?"

"Sure," I said. The rain was coming down heavier now.

"Cheer up," Gina said. "It's your bachelorette party."

The margaritas did cheer me up a little. And the Cosmos did even more.

In fact I was so cheered up I hardly even noticed when they hauled me into the tattoo parlor.

"Hey," I said when we sat down in the waiting room. "No tats. Sorry."

"Did he say anything about a belly button ring?" Kristen asked with a smile.

I smiled back. I had always wanted one.

So I guess that's how I ended up on the exam-style table in the back with my shirt up and Kristen holding my hand. She had hers pierced and swore it didn't hurt.

She lied.

After _that_ was over we went back to the hotel room they had rented.

"Jesse's going to kill me," I whispered, running my hand over my belly button and the new stud that was in it.

Gina made a noise. "You've gotta have a little freedom."

"You should have gotten a tattoo," Summer said. I had learned that, with a few margaritas in her, Summer is pretty cool to hang out with. I don't think I'll mind having her was a sister very much.

"Then he _really_ would have killed me."

I closed my eyes. What was Jesse doing now? Sleeping? Watching TV? Worrying about tomorrow, too?

It thundered loudly outside, then I drifted off to sleep.

L7L7L7L7L7

I woke up with a bad headache. It was dark outside. I looked at my phone - it was two in the morning. I hadn't been asleep that long.

I struggled to my feet and to the bathroom, where I emptied my very full bladder. Then I washed my face, hoping I hadn't already jinxed myself by falling asleep with my make up. I would probably wake up with a huge zit.

I dried off my face and looked into the mirror, and jumped when I saw her behind me.

Lea.

"What do you want?" I asked rudely. But hey, I was tried, I was slightly hung over . . .

She was getting on my nerves.

"You," she said, a glimmer in her eyes.

"Don't creep me out," I said, and went to open the door. It was locked. "Very funny," I said. "Please, just let me out and I promise we can continue this later."

She laughed. "Oh, Suze. You don't get it, do you? You're not leaving. That is, you're not leaving alive."

"Good one," I said, jerking the door open. It slammed back.

I turned around and was face to face with a hung knife and a piece of rope.

What is it with ghosts and knifes, anyways? They're _so_ original.

She pushed it up against my throat and pulled the rope tight around my neck.

"Not so fast," I whispered. She sneered at me.

But, before she could realize, I was putting those self-defense classes to work, and she was on the ground, the knife thrown out of her hand and the rope no where to be seen.

I had my hands wrapped around her neck, and she was making choking noises.

"Stay away from me, bitch," I whispered to her. "Stay away from me and my friend."

"Never," she whispered, and disappeared.

I fell to the floor with a thud.

I lifted up my head in the sudden silence. The knife was gone.

I sprung to my feet and jerked the bathroom door open. Nothing. Just darkness and cheep carpet.

All my bridesmaids were still asleep. I found a pen and notepad and scribbled a rough message in the dark.

_I have to see Jesse. I have to spend the night with him, or I don't think I can do it. I'll see you in the morning. _

There. Sweet and to the point. I laid it down by Gina's head and, grabbing my phone and purse, walked outside into the vacant hall.

I pressed the home contact on my phone. Jesse picked up quickly.

"Jesse," I whispered. "Come get me."

"Why? What's wrong? What have you done?"

My fingers went to my belly button automatically - I pushed it out of my head. "Nothing. Well, I didn't do anything. Lea's back, Jesse. She tried to hurt me."

"Susannah, don't be - "

"Jesse!" I yelled, then quieted down. I probably sounded hysterical to him. "Please, just come get me."

"Okay," he said. "I'll be right there."

I waited for him in the vacant lobby. The receptionist was too busy with late night business people to notice me leave when Jesse's car came into view.

Jesse turned on the overhead light when I shut the door. He gently touched my neck. I opened the mirror to see a red indention around it.

"Perfect," I mumbled.

"What did she do?" he asked.

"She had a knife, and a rope - "

"A rope? She tried to - " he took a deep breath. "She tried to strangle you?"

I realized, with sudden horror, that was the exact way he had died. Lea had to have known.

I nodded. Jesse's eyes turned to ice. He sneered in Spanish.

"No!" I said as we started to drive away. "Jesse, I don't think I can . . . Look, we have two options here."

He looked at me.

"One, we can exorcise her."

He nodded.

"Or, two, we can bring her back."

He stomped on the breaks. Luckily we were at a red light.

"No, Susannah. I'm not putting you through that again."

"_I_ wouldn't have to."

"Then who would?"

I smiled. "I know someone who's willing."

Jesse laughed. "No. You are not involving _him_."

"Jesse please. Aren't you the one always telling me to do the right thing?"

"She tried to kill you. _I'll_ exorcise her, if you want."

"Jesse," I whispered. "Just think."

"How will we explain this to Ben?"

I shrugged. "We'll just tell him."

"Susannah - "

"And Paul can get the body from the wreck - right before she died. Then everyone will just think she is missing."

Jesse sighed. "I highly doubt this will work_. I_ barely made it, and I wasn't in a car crash beforehand."

"But she'll be traveling through less time."

He made a face, then was quiet.

It didn't surprise me when he pulled into Ben's driveway instead of ours.

"You're explaining," he said meekly. I kissed his cheek.

To say Ben was surprised was an understatement. As soon as he saw us he wanted to know what was wrong - he probably thought it was his girlfriend.

"Nothing's wrong," I said cheerfully. "In fact, everything is great. You want to go sit down?"

"Why?" he asked, still apprehensive.

Jesse sighed. "We just need to talk with you, Ben. It will be quick."

We went into Ben's living room, and he sat down on the couch. I pulled up a chair, and Jesse just stood beside me.

"Ben," I said. "What if I told you . . . that I can see ghosts."

"I'd think you were crazy." He sent a look to Jesse.

"I can see them too," Jesse said quietly.

Ben's eyes got huge. Then he put his hand over his mouth and tired to say something.

"What?" I asked.

"You . . . can see her, can't you? She's been around here, hasn't she? Oh my God, I thought I was going crazy but . . . it really is her."

"Yeah, well she isn't supposed to be here. There is something keeping her here."

"Me," he whispered, hanging his head.

"Maybe," I said. "But we had an idea. We thought that, maybe, we could bring her back."

"To _life?_ That's impossible."

I shrugged. "It worked with him," I said, and pointed to my fiancé.

Ben looked up at Jesse, his eyes huge. "How old are you?" he asked, like it was something he had wanted to ask for a long time.

Jesse sighed. "Right over one-hundred and seventy."

Ben let out a deep breath. "It makes more sense now," he whispered.

"Jesse was haunting my room, when I moved here when I was sixteen," I started. "Only, he wouldn't move on . . . because of me. So I went back in time to get his body and brought it back here and, well, stuck his soul in it."

Ben had turned white at that point.

Jesse cleared his throat, embarrassed. "Now, it's very risky. Very. I almost didn't make it."

I nodded.

"How did you die?" Ben asked, still a subject behind.

Jesse sighed. "It's a long story, and I'll have to tell you sometime. I was murdered, ultimately." Ben shook his head. "But," Jesse said. "It all turned out for the better." He patted my shoulder.

"When?" Ben asked.

"1850. The day before California was admitted to the Union."

Ben put his head in his hands. I reached out to pat his shoulder, but Jesse stopped me. He just needed time, I guess.

Finally he lifted his head and sighed. "So how are we going to do this?"

"Well," Jesse said, pacing. "We are going to need to go to the hospital. And Susannah, you need to call Sla - _Paul_."

"Okay," I said, seeing a opportunity to make an exit. I headed out the front door and heard Ben ask who Paul was as I left.

Paul answered on the second ring. "Cold feet?" he asked.

"Funny. Actually, I have a favor to ask you. And, no, not a sexual favor."

"Hum," he said. "Shoot."

I told him about Lea, which he already knew about, of course. I also told him about Ben and how I was pretty sure she wasn't going to be leaving any time soon.

"So why don't you just exorcise her?" he asked.

I sighed. "Because, Paul, I think . . . yes, I'm pretty sure that somewhere deep inside me is a heart."

He laughed. "Just get rid of her."

"Paul!" I said. "Please do this! For all the times I've had put up with your crap."

He sighed. "I guess I did give you a lot of crap in high school," he said with fake sincerity.

"Yeah," I said. "You did."

"Fine." He seemed a little excited. "Where should I meet you?"

"At the hospital, on the fifth floor. Jesse said it will be the emptiest."

"_He'll_ be there?"

"Um, duh. Meet us there in half and hour, okay?"

"Okay," he sighed.

I closed my phone. Jesse slipped outside.

"He'll meet us there," he said. I nodded. It felt like we were about to get away with murder - then, I realized, that that might happen. She might die. What would we do then?

I asked Jesse as we drove. He sighed. His face was in the dark, and I squinted to see him. "Slater can take her back, I guess. Then everything will be back to normal."

"Will Ben remember?" I asked.

"I don't know," he snapped, irritated. Then he sighed and apologized.

We had arrived at the hospital by then. Jesse parked on the bottom floor of the newly built parking deck, where there weren't many cars. I got out and shut my door, then jumped when I heard a scream. I came around to get a better view of the elevators, and saw a pregnant woman being pushed into the elevator by her husband.

Jesse smiled down at me. I breathed a sigh of relief.

We waited for the elevator to go up, then pressed the up button. It had started raining again, and the drops were big and loud on the metal siding and falling from the gutters. Jesse put an arm around me. "It will stop," he whispered. I hoped he was right.

When we go on the elevator he pressed the button for the fifth floor, and we started going up. The doors opened to the floor, and Jesse pulled me to the right, away from the nurse's station, where I could here a TV going.

He pulled me into an empty room around the corner and shut the door behind me. I was surprised to see Ben already there, wheeling a big machine into place beside the bed.

"Um," I said, getting that murder feeling again. "Let me go see where Paul is."

I let myself out and called his number. I heard him answer - on the phone in my left ear and also in my right.

"Paul," I hissed. "Shush! You are so loud. Come around the corner to 519."

He came into view, closing his cell phone. When he saw me he smiled a bright smile. I groaned inwardly. I shouldn't have done this.

"So what's new?" he asked. Then he looked concerned. "What happened to your neck?"

"Lea tried to . . . hurt me," I said. No use in getting him worked up about it too. "Come on, Paul. Let's get this over with."

"Lead the way," he said, and his eyes fell to my hips. I looked down and realized I was still in the sweats I had changed into at the hotel - they made my butt look huge. I groaned out loud and opened the door.

Paul was cold to Jesse, who made quick introductions and asked him if he was ready.

"You got something?" he asked. "Of hers, I mean. Lea's."

Ben pulled out a small diamond ring and let it fall into Paul's open hand. "She was wearing it . . . when it happened."

Paul nodded, then sighed and closed his eyes. He started getting lighter, like a ghost disappearing, then he was gone.

Ben was staring with his mouth wide open. "Can you both do that?" he asked.

"Just me, that we know of," I said. "Jesse has never tried."

"And you aren't supposed to," Jesse said, his eyebrows pulled down. "It can kill you, eventually."

"I don't, after you," I said. The fact that I had a headache for a month kept me from doing it.

"Why does he do it, then?" Ben asked, and nodded to were Paul had been.

"He's stupid," I said.

"His morals are a bit different," Jesse said a second later.

Paul was back - it was like a comet crashing into the room, only it was soundless. He had Lea in his strong tan arms - she was bloody, limp, and blue. I stood back as Jesse and Ben went to work - she was lying on the bed and hooked up to IVs in three very long minutes.

"Lea," I whispered.

She was there, staring at me with all the outrage she could possibly hold. Her hands were in fists and her perfectly mascaraed eyes were narrowed. I took a deep breath and charged at her, into her, and she flew back with a scream and landed onto her own lifeless body. She melted into it, and it jolted.

I just stood in the background at first, staring. Paul was beside me. The signs weren't good - her heart rate was low, and the only reason she was breathing was the ventilator.

"She's stable," Jesse finally whispered.

We stood in silence for two minutes, and I was about to ask something, but the monitors went crazy with beeps and hisses. We all looked at Ben. The hand over his mouth was shaking.

"Let's shock her," he said quickly. They started ripping off her dress and someone got out the electric paddles.

I grabbed Paul's arm and pulled him into the hall. Outside of the room it was a different world - calm and with only the sound of the TV at the nurse's station. "I can't take it," I confessed after I had shut the door.

Paul shrugged. "Should've got rid of her."

"Oh, God, Paul, are you totally heartless?"

He shrugged. "You used to think the same way. Seems like hubby in there has made you soft."

I started up at him, clutching my stomach. I wondered, out of no where, if the lady I had seen had had her baby yet.

"I'm going to go scout the perimeter," he said with a wicked smile. "Text me if you need me."

I put my head on the wall as he walked off. The door opened beside me.

Jesse smiled at me. He was bloody and looked tired. He shut the door and wrapped his arms around me. "It won't be much longer," he whispered.

"What?" I croaked, holding back tears.

"We resuscitated her again, and she's stable, but her heart rate is declining. She's awake, though, and talking. They're saying goodbye."

An epiphany hit me like a softball to the head. A goodbye. Could that have been all she wanted? Could I have done the right thing?

"Jesse," I whispered. "Do you think I did the right thing?" I looked up at him. He nodded, and kissed my forehead.

We stood in the hallway for a who knows how long with Jesse holding me. It was nice, to think I had done the right thing, here on the eve of my wedding. I tried to think about tomorrow, but couldn't. It was like another life.

Eventually Paul came back and, after making a smart comment about Jesse and me, said the "area was clear".

The door creaked open. Ben stood in the frame, his face red from crying. He just nodded and let Paul and Jesse in.

"Um," he said, taking his hand through his hair. "She said to tell you thanks. She said that . . . " he took a deep breath, and his eyes filled with tears again. "That she was sorry for being a bitch, but you really helped her. You gave her what she wanted. What we wanted."

I nodded. "You're both welcome."

He looked into the room, then asked, "That's it, isn't it?"

"Yeah," I said. "She's gone."

_Stay tuned for the weddddinnnnggggg chapter!!!!! then new story - the honeymoon! it will be short, but cute! _


	18. Chapter 18

_See You In My Nightmare by Kanye West featuring Lil Wayne. This song is amazing_

I woke up in my own bed, the sun warm on my face. I felt the pillow beside me, and when my hands came up empty, opened my eyes. There was a small piece of paper folded in half on the vacant pillow. I grabbed it quickly, expecting a beautiful letter about our wedding day, but saw the message was a bit shorter than that.

_We are going to have to talk about that piece of metal in your stomach._

My hands went to my new piercing. He must have seen it this morning, since my shirt had worked its was up my torso. I pulled it back down and wadded up the note. Stupid.

I sat up and, for the first time, realized the weather. I got out of bed and ran to the window, which was open. It was warm, but not hot, and the sun was bright in the cloudless sky. I squeaked with joy.

"Well," I heard someone say. I turned around to see Gina, her arms crossed. Her voice had been harsh, but her expression was light. "Look who's up."

"It's not raining!" I sung.

She looked out the window behind me and nodded, her expression simple, like she was agreeing with someone mentally handicapped.

I came and grabbed her hands and swung her arms. "It's not raining, I feel great, and my - " I let go of her and went to the mirror in the bathroom. "MY FACE LOOKS GREAT!" I yelled to her.

She came into the bathroom and pulled me out. "That's great," she said, towing me to the living room. "But we have to go! Everyone else is already at the salon."

I was given the "bridal package" - manicure, pedicure, and, with much convincing on Gina's part, a complete wax job.

Ugh.

Then all my bridesmaids, my mother, my aunt, and I loaded into a limo Andy had rented for us and headed to Pebble Beach, where we were ushered into a big room called the Bridal Suite.

"The Clinique lady will be here in an hour to do your make-up, and the hair stylist will be here after that," my mom told me after I had checked on my dress, which was hanging in the corner of the room. It was as perfect as the first time I had seen it.

"An hour?" I asked.

"Yes, an hour. We are running a little early. But you can go check on the wedding and reception, if you want."

"Is Jesse here?" I asked excitedly.

My mom pursed her lips. "Not yet."

"What is he doing?"

She sighed. "He had to get some things settle about the honeymoon, and I think he was picking up your car."

"Really? My car's fixed? Wait," I said, grabbing her shoulder. "The honeymoon. Do you know where we're going?"

She smiled. "I'm not supposed to tell you."

I groaned.

Gina went to check on the wedding with me. They where pulling chairs out of a trailer that wore white cotton covers on their backs and had a lavender bow, reflecting the colors we had finally decided on. There was a white cotton tent being set up on at the beginning of the isle, where I would make my grand entrance. They were just now unloading the wooden platform that would be the alter.

"Let's go look at the food!" Gina said, taking my arm. We walked up the boardwalk and to the restaurant, which was busy with lunch time golfers.

"Suze!" I heard someone yell, and turned to see Barbie, her hands on her hips. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Um, I just wanted to see how things were coming." I cleared my throat and added, "It's my wedding, you know."

She roller her eyes. "Let's not be a bridezilla, now." She pushed me into the next room, which was empty of customers. "We're working on the tables, but we are going to arrange them in a circular order around the buffet. And they will have the same colors, of course. The orchids came in this morning." She made a face. She didn't like my idea of orchids - which I had insisted on.

"So everything is ready?"

She nodded. "All under control. Don't you worry your pretty little head."

I went back to the Bridal Suite. All my bridesmaids were talking, eating, and texting their boyfriends. I stared out the window. Jesse had promised to come see me, and we were running out of time.

Someone knocked on the door. I jumped up to answer it, but Kristen was faster.

"May I speak with the bride?" I heard Jesse ask. His sweet, distinctive voice made my heart speed up.

Kristen looked at me, then back through the door. "I don't know . . . "

"No!" Gina said. "No seeing the bride before the wedding. Are you crazy?"

"Gina!" I walked over to her. "Please? Just ten minutes."

She crossed her legs. "Bad luck . . . " she sung.

I rolled my eyes.

"Five minutes," she said. "And no fooling around."

"Come on," I said as they started to leave. "We're not going to have _sex_."

I went to the door after they had filed out and looked up at Jesse. He smiled back at me, and I pulled him in and locked the door.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and put my head on his chest. He lifted up my chin and gave me a long kiss. His fingers fell down over my collarbone, boobs, ribs, and to my stomach, when he broke the kiss.

"Really?" he asked, fingering the diamond stud.

"Oh, come on, Jesse," I said, playfully pushing on his chest and pouting. "You know I would do something bad."

"I said - "

"You said nothing about piercings."

He pursed his lips. "What if it gets infected?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'll take it out."

"But . . . what if it's too late? What if it . . . infects your uterus, and we can never have children?"

I raised an eyebrow. He raised one in return. "Well," I said. "I guess we will just adopt one of those cute kids from Korea."

He sighed.

"Look," I said, raising my shirt. "Isn't it cute? And totally infection-free."

"It doesn't hurt?" He took his fingers over it, and the feeling they left kept away all the sting of the newly pierced skin. I shook my head with a smile.

"Two minutes!" Gina yelled from outside the door.

I grabbed the front of his black t shirt. "You have to tell me where we are going."

He pouted and, taking his hand down my back, shook his head.

"Can I have a hint?"

"No."

"Is it some place warm?"

He looked at me. "Do you think I would take you somewhere cold?"

I laughed. "Really? Okay, will we be in a different time zone?"

He shook his head. He wasn't telling me no, just that he couldn't tell me. I sighed.

"When will I find out?"

"Tomorrow, when we get on the plane."

"Wait, we're leaving tomorrow?"

He sighed, not liking giving out this kind of information. "I couldn't get a flight out that late at night."

"Hum. So where are we staying tonight?"

He pointed out the window, across the parking lot, to the Pebble Beach Resort. "They offered us the honeymoon suite because we booked the wedding here."

"Seriously?" I squeaked.

He smiled and nodded.

"Open the door!" Gina yelled, pulling on the knob.

I sighed and Jesse grabbed me up in one more wonderful kiss, leaving me hungry for our wedding night.

"Alright, alright," he said when he opened the door. "You can have her back." He gave me one more smile and disappeared around the door.

A woman wearing way too much blush came into the door and smiled at me. She was toting a huge case, and I could only imagine all the color combinations and eyeshadows in there.

"Hi," she said. "Ready for make-up?"

"Yes!" I said, and went to sit in front of the mirror. While my make-up was being done the hairstylist came and rolled my hair up in big rollers, then sprayed it with enough hairspray to deplete the ozone.

The whole process, documented by the photographer, who had arrived after the hairstylist, took the rest of the afternoon, and before I knew it it was four. One hour until the wedding.

My make-up looked so good I had to strike a pose when no one was looking. The hair stylist unrolled my hair to show the full, glossy waves it had made. Then more hairspray.

Finally I was pulled out of the chair by three different people pushed behind a changing screen.

"Here," Gina said, handing me a Victoria's Secret bag. "Compliments of me."

The all lace, white, and matching strapless bra and panty set was so sexy it gave me a thrill up my leg to put them on. I couldn't wait to see Jesse's face.

When I walked around the screen three different people grabbed me and pulled me to the full length mirror. The dress was unzipped and lower to the floor so I could step in. I put each foot delicately into the skirt, then it rose around me to hug me.

"Oh," Kristen said beside me as Gina zipped it up. "It's so beautiful. You're so beautiful."

"And Jesse's gonna go crazy over that bra!" Gina whispered to me.

My mom had come in, and when she saw me she chocked and covered her smile with her hand. Andy was right behind her, looking a little awkward.

"Oh, honey!" she cried. "You look so beautiful!"

"Thanks," I said, fixing my hair so it hung perfectly.

"Oh, I don't want to hug you, but, oh Suze!"

I smiled at her. "You look great too, Mom."

She straitened her lavender dress and shrugged. Andy handed her the two small boxes he had.

"Oh, Suze, this is from us. I hope you like them."

I opened the smallest box she had, and chocked when I saw the pearl earrings surrounded by diamonds.

"Mom! Andy!" I yelled. "They're beautiful! You shouldn't have - the wedding is enough of a present!"

"I'm glad you like them," she said. Then she handed me the longer box. "This is from Jesse. He wanted me to give it to you."

I sighed - he bought me too many things. Not that I minded, of course.

I opened the velvet lid and ran my fingers over the silver chain that held the single pearl, suspended by a piece of sliver with diamonds. I chocked again.

"I'm going to kill him," I whispered while a few people crowded around and oohed and ahed.

"Isn't it beautiful?" my mom asked. "He picked it out and thought the earrings would look good with it."

I put on the earrings and the necklace, then sighed. They looked perfect with my strapless dress and full waves of hair.

"OK!" a voice I, sadly, had to identify as Barbie's sounded over the room. "Let's get the wedding party into the tent! Come on, come on!"

We lined up at the door, and headed down the hall and the sidewalk, where people pointed and smiled at me. It tried not to give them any bad looks, but it was hard. When we walked down the boardwalk I tried to raise up even taller, but I couldn't see. My high heels would have to wait until the reception - no heels in the sand.

I heard the music for the wedding party start and my chest rose quickly. I tried to see around the tent, but couldn't. I just wanted to see him.

The wedding party filled though the tent, leaving only Andy and me.

"Ready, kid?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said, as loudly as I could.

"Breathe," he laughed. I took a deep breath.

Then the music was playing, and I was walking out of the shade of the tent and into the colors of the sunset. And there was Jesse, the most beautiful, wonderful man in the world, on the alter with the orange ball of sun at his back.

I smiled at him. His returning smile touched my heart like nothing ever had. A sob welled up inside me.

The sand was like clouds to my feet. I couldn't see anyone, anything, but Jesse. He was so handsome in his suit, his hair being tugged on in the wind, the beautiful, ridiculous smile on his tan face. I had never wanted him more.

We had reached the alter. Everyone sat down. Andy kissed my cheek and gave my hands to Jesse, who helped me up onto the alter. His touch was even better than his smile. I felt my eyes water.

He smile at me. He knew I was about to cry.

Father Dom, standing beside us, said something. If fact, he went on for a while, but I couldn't really concentrate. The tears had started coming, and I had to try not to sob out loud. Jesse turned - he had my ring. I turned and grabbed his. We slipped then on each other's fingers.

Finally I heard it -

"Do you, Susannah, take Jesse to be your husband? To love and respect, to have and to hold, until death do you part?"

A sob broke through. I couldn't help it. "I do," I managed to choke out. I wondered if everyone could understand it. Jesse looked like he did.

"And do you, Jesse, take Susannah to be your wife - "

Jesse's face was priceless. This was the face I would always picture of, I vowed. This would be his caller ID in my head.

"Of course I do," he said.

I laughed. I probably looked like an idiot, but I didn't care. I was married.

"And now," Father Dom said, and I looked at him for the first time and smiled even bigger, "I am very happy to pronounce you husband and wife. Finally."

"_Finally_," we both agreed.

Everyone was standing and clapping. The flower girl threw the rest of the flowers into the air - I knew it made Barbie steam, but I didn't care. My wedding had been perfect.

Now I just needed some food, some wine, and then I wanted to shut the world away for a week and never leave the bed.

Everyone clapped when we went into the restaurant, and Jesse led me strait to the "dance floor", which was the dining room cleared of tables and chairs. Some song started playing - I don't know which. All I know was when Jesse pulled me into his arms, his left hand wrapped around mine, and I saw those matching silver bands on our hands - mine with a circle of diamonds, his a little scratched, since it was originally my dad's - I started to cry again.

God. Why did I keep doing this? I never, ever cried. But Jesse put his hand behind my head and I laid it on his chest.

"You look so beautiful," he whispered.

I smiled up at him. "Thanks. You look great, too. _So great_," I sighed.

He chucked. "Are you ready for tonight, too?"

"_Yes_," I said, exasperated. "I can't wait for tonight."

He hugged me tighter. "Susannah," he started, and I looked up at him. "My sister . . . moved on this morning. She wanted me to tell her how happy she was for us, and that she was glad to have you as a sister."

"Really?" I whispered. To receive approval from one of Jesse's sisters was unthought of to me.

He smiled again and nodded.

We chatted for the rest of the dance, but I couldn't concentrate yet again. It was still trying to process that Jesse was _married_. To _me_.

The song eventually ended, and everyone clapped and several people told me how beautiful I was. I smiled and thanked them, but never let go of Jesse.

We danced some more, and ate some of the delicious food. Jesse met all my relatives, which he endured with a smile. I never loved him more.

"Did you know," Jesse asked in the middle of one of our dances, "that Slater is here?"

"He is?" I looked away from Jesse, a hard thing to do, and around the room. And there he was, standing by the door, like he was about to leave.

"Go ahead," Jesse sighed, and let go of me. I made my way though the dancing couples - where I spotted Summer and Jake, looking like they were actually enjoying themselves, and Ben and Kristen, looking more goggly-eyed at each other than usual.

"Paul!" I called out when he reached for the door. He turned and smiled at me as I got closer.

"You look great," he said with a sly smile.

"Thanks," I said. "Do you want to dance before you leave?"

"Yeah," he said. "That'd be nice."

We went back onto the dance floor. Jesse had started dancing with Gina, and they were talking intently about something. The honeymoon? What I wouldn't give to be closer to their conversation.

But I looked back at Paul, who obviously looked a little wounded, and knew I should concentrate on dancing with him. He was the loser in this story, sadly. We both knew it.

"So," he said, a little awkward. I had only danced with Paul a few times - at several high school dances where he would ambush me away from Jesse. "Where's the honeymoon?"

"I don't know," I said, a little bitter. "It's a _surprise_."

He laughed, then looked down at me again. "Suze . . ." he started, then stopped.

"What?" I asked quickly. I didn't know if I wanted him to go on or not.

"Well, I just don't want you to think that I still . . . like you or anything. I mean, you're my friend, and I wish it had turned out different between us, but I have realized, very recently, that I'm a grown man and, well, I . . . I'm over you, Suze."

"Wow," I said, stunned.

"Yeah," he whispered. "And I'm glad you're finally married. You and Jesse go pretty good together."

I smiled up at him. "Paul, you realize that _I_ realized this about eight years ago, right?"

"I know," he said. "And, it's not like I have been, you know, stalking you since we graduated. I have actually had a few good relationships. Things just didn't work out, I'm afraid. They never do," he added bitterly.

"Paul," I sighed. "You'll find someone. Someone perfect for you. And, if it happens to be someone of the, well, undead variety, then I will be glad to help you there, too."

He laughed. "That won't happen."

The song ended. He let go of me. "Thanks, Paul. For the dance. And for . . . everything. If it wasn't for you . . . " I looked towards Jesse, who had found my mom and was dancing with her. "Well, we won't be here today."

"I know," he said, and I couldn't read the expression on his face. "And you look great. Let me know when you get back - maybe we can have lunch or something?"

"Yeah, that would be nice."

He nodded awkwardly, and I hugged him. Then he was gone.

"Suze!" I was hugged from behind, and immediately tried to get out of the grasp. "_Great_ open bar, man."

Brad. The last person I wanted to see. "I'm a girl," I reminded him.

"_Sooooze_," he said, blowing alcohol-tainted breath into my face. Then he let go and started chasing after Summer for a dance. "Sister!" he was calling out. "Come dance with your _brooooo_!"

Jesse came back up behind me and squeezed my hand. "Ready for the cake?"

"Yes!" I said. Everyone was already crowding around it. My mom handed us a knife when we got to the center of the crowd and we sank it into the white icing. We took two pieces and I held mine out for Jesse. "I swear," I said. "If you put this in my face . . . "

"I won't," he promised.

I brought the cake closer to his face. He brought his piece closer to mine, his eyebrow raised. He put his piece in my mouth and I swallowed it in one bite - then I pushed my piece in his face.

"No!" he yelled as I laughed, then grabbed my face with his caked hands and kissed me. It was the same effect as him smashing it in my face - it got all over me. Everyone clapped.

"I'll get you," I said, whipping the cake off with a napkin. He just laughed.

"Bouquet!" someone yelled. "Throw the bouquet!"

I was pushed into the center of the room and all the single - well, unmarried - girls gathered behind me. I throw the flowers over my head with a laugh, and turned to see Kristen, in the back, and caught them. She screamed and held them up in victory, then threw them at Ben, who caught them with a smile.

Next came the guarder. Kristen, glowing since she caught the bouquet, grabbed a chair for me and pushed Jesse in front of me. He got down on his knee and looked up at me with a shy smile. I was glad I didn't see my mom around.

"Which leg?" Jesse asked as lightly as possible.

"Um," I said, turning a little red. "Either."

"Either?"

I nodded. "Both," I said quietly.

He sighed, smiled, and lifted up my skirt. I tried to find something to look at while his fingers inched up my left leg.

His fingers wrapped around it and he came out with it, smiling. He threw it into the crowd, then hugged me.

"Ready to leave?" he asked. "_I_ sure am."

It was well into the night by now - close to nine, probably. "Yeah, just let me tell my mom . . . "

My mom had, luckily, been in the bathroom. "Ready to leave?" she asked with a smile.

"Yeah," I said shyly.

"Okay, let's go get everyone together, then!"

They really didn't have to throw rice - it got all in my hair and went down my dress. But it was fine, I guess. Especially when I saw my car, shining in the flood lights of the restaurant, completely fixed. It looked as good as new.

Jesse opened my door and went to the drivers side. I waved out the window until everyone was out of sight. Jesse drove across the parking lot and in front of the Pebble Beach Resort.

I looked over at him. He smiled at me.

"It's so quiet," I whispered.

He nodded, pushing my hair back. "You look so lovely," he whispered.

I smiled. My stomach was all butterflies.

Jesse had already checked us in, so we didn't have to wait for our key. We went strait to the elevator, which opened immediately, and then to the top floor.

Jesse opened the door with the swipe key and picked me up in his arms. I laughed and he carried me through the door. "Oh my God . . . " I whispered.

There was only one lamp on, and it's light was low. There was a bottle of champagne in a chiller and candles everywhere. The bed was scattered with rose petals.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

"You did this!" I squeaked. He nodded. "Jesse . . . " I wrapped my arms around his neck. "You are just perfect, aren't you?"

He laughed and carried me into the room, where he gently set me down. "I'm not perfect, _querida_. But you make me feel pretty close right now." He kissed my lips and I helped him shrug out of his jacket and undid his tie.

I broke the kiss and turned around. "Unzip me," I said. He did. "Now," I said, turing around and wrapping my arms around him. "I have a surprise for you, and you are going to _love_ it." I took his tie and put it around my neck.

"You're leaving me?" He pouted.

"Only for a minute," I said, patting his cheek. "I couldn't keep that face waiting very long."

I went into the bathroom and, as gently as I could, took off my dress and hung it up. I brushed out my hair and shook it out a little so it was in a sexy disarray. I scrutinized myself in the mirror, then tied Jesse's black tie loosely around my neck. I pulled the remaining guarder up my thigh. Perfect.

I flung the bathroom door open and leaned against it's frame. Jesse, who had opened the bottle of champagne and undid a few buttons of his shirt, looked up and shook his head, a smile on his lips. He poured two glasses halfway full of the champagne while I walked over to him.

"What?" I asked. I wondered if he was going to lecture me about the bellybutton ring again.

"You are very bad," he whispered when I threw my arms around him. He buried his face into the bottom of my neck and kissed me again and again.

"You can be bad, too, you know."

He pulled away and smiled up at me. "I can be?" He reached behind him and handed me my glass of champagne.

I nodded. "In situations like this, I mean."

He shrugged and whispered in my ear, "I like being bad with you."

I downed my glass. It fizzed down my throat. He had started kissing me down my collarbone and on my chest. I dug my fingers into his back.

He lifted me up in his arms again and laid me down on the bed. Then he sat, gently, on top of me and took off his shirt. We both wrestled with his belt, then his pants.

He finally laid on top of me and went to work on what I was wearing. The last thing he took off was the tie, which he took off very slowly, letting it drape over places it didn't need to drape.

"Jesse," I breathed. "Please. I've been waiting all day."

"No teasing?" he asked with a smile. I shook my head. "Oh, I see," he whispered. "You're going to cry again."

"Am not," I managed. He laughed and kissed me.

"Don't worry, _querida_," he whispered, finally throwing the tie on the floor. "I'll take care of you."

And he did.

It was close to midnight when I rolled on top of him and kissed every bit of skin I could find. "Alright," I growled to him. "I gave you your surprise. Now where is mine?"

He sighed. "Tomorrow."

"No! Jesse, this is killing me!" I propped myself up on his chest and played with his wonderfully thick hair. "I hate surprises," I reminded him.

He looked at me for a long second, then roll his eyes and pointed behind me. "It's in your suitcase, if you want it so badly."

"Really? Ah, I love you!" I hopped up and went to the big Kate Spade suitcase. "Wait," I said, pausing at the zipper. "This is mine?"

"A present from Gina," he said. "She wanted me to tell you she wants something just as wonderful when she gets married." I looked back at him. He had sat up and had his arms wrapped around his knees. He nodded for me to go on.

I unzipped the sides and stared, open-mouthed, at all the clothes. I remember she told me she got a lot of designer stuff for free because of her job, but she never mentioned they came in a _six_.

I tried to remind myself of the honeymoon, and saw the envelope with Delta written on it in the mesh zip-up compartment. I pulled it out and went back to the bed to sit with my husband, - God, that was so weird to think - who wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head.

"I know it's not where you wanted to go," he said when I pulled out the tickets. Our flight was to Hawaii. "But we are staying in the honeymoon suit of a four-star hotel, and we have a wonderful view of the water, and-"

"Jesse," I said, throwing the tickets on the end of the bed and wrapping my arms around him. "You could take me to freaking Disney World, for all I care. Hawaii sounds wonderful. Especially with you."

"Really?" he asked, smiling. I hugged him tighter._ This is my husband_, I told myself, and laughed out loud.

"Really," I said, and pushed him back on the bed.

_Ok, so thanks to all my faithful readers and reviewers, and please look out for the sequel to this lovely story called NEWLYWEDS....its about the honeymoon and what kind of trouble Suze gets into in Hawaii. It will only be about 5 chapters long, but it should be fun! Thanks again! _


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